Parents say priest told mourners that son may be kept out of heaven over suicide: report

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A Philippine Priest use to say Mass at a Parish here that was largely made up of people from Southeast Asia here but not so much those from the Philippines.

There could be a chance, this is all a misunderstanding, an innocent misunderstanding, cultural clash, language barrier but not so much as malice on the Priest’s part. He could have been saying what he understood was correct.
 
emilysue said:
The NY Times story has more details about the homily than I’ve seen previously, even some quotes from the homily:
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This does look like it could go either way and the NY Times piece is helpful as it cites Catholic teaching both ways. If the Priest did not care to honor the family’s wishes, they could have gotten another Priest. However, we clearly do not know that anything was agreed to. This could set a precedent in the future. Likewise, it could go against the Priests beliefs to say different. Then, he might object.

The article mentions India, maybe they see similarly in the Philippines and that is also informative that suicide has gone up 25% per the article since 2000. Coincidentally, that is also a time of the rising popularity of the internet and social media.

Unfortunately, I’ve read a few cases, where teens have killed themselves and it is almost as much about social media as real life.
 
The quotes don’t seem bad at all to me. Of course I prefer the thinking of the Church back when they thought Dies irae made sense at a Requiem Mass. When I die I hope they are as interested in my and my family’s wishes. But what you tend to find with the modern orthodoxy is that it’s insistence on bending to people only works in certain directions.
 
CYA from the diocese. It almost always in in these scenarios.
 
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JulianN said:
The Archdiocese has apologized. The priest in question is temporarily banned from celebrating funerals, and future homilies will be reviewed by a mentor priest.
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I don’t see why. If the following is his homily, then I don’t see anything wrong with it and so this is nothing but fake news.

cdn.cnn.com
 
That homily didn’t seem inappropriate at all. It’s focus was entirely upon the hope of God’s love, mercy, and forgiveness. The priest seems to be trying to assure the family that suicide isn’t a one way ticket to hell, as some people believe it is.
 
Wow, I think that was a great homily (if it is the homily given) for the funeral of someone who committed suicide. He explains exactly how despite his having committed this sin, he is not ipso facto barred from Heaven.

If that is the homily, I think that maybe the problem was that what he said was different from what the parents wanted and/or expected. The parents seem to have not understood Church teaching on the Last Four Things, and thus seen this positive message as negative.

(I do wish dioceses and archdiocesess would stand behind Church teaching and the priests who preach or act in accord with Church teaching.)
 
13pollitos said:
The priest, also an adult in a mentor role, said things during his funeral that amount to bullying and continued doing so after being asked by his dad to stop.
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I just read through the homily. I think it was actually a very good homily given the circumstances of the boy’s death. It was more about asking for God’s mercy than condemning the boy. I would be happy to have this priest celebrate my funeral Mass.
 
If that was the homily then the diocese should be ashamed of itself for not standing with the priest. The family should also be ashamed for lying and smearing a man’s reputation.

The family had a dust up with the football coach at the funeral. These bits of evidence lead me to wonder if the family has serious problems.
 
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exnihilo said:
…wonder if the family has serious problems.
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The family is seriously hurting. Grief is not a rational thing. The two threads currently running on this topic have opened my eyes to the fact that the family’s behavior is understandable. Their response is a sort of reflexive lashing out, and though it may be disproportionate, unproductive, and wrong, it is also understandable. Let us pray for all who are grieving.
 
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It is understandable that the family may be acting irrationally. But, people shouldn’t give in to that. Being understanding doesn’t mean we yield to it.
 
bible.usccb.org

Ecclesiastes, CHAPTER 3

Daily Bible Readings, Podcast Audio and Videos and Prayers brought to you by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.
bible.usccb.org bible.usccb.org

1 There is an appointed time for everything,

and a time for every affair under the heavens.

2 A time to give birth, and a time to die;

a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant.

3 A time to kill, and a time to heal;

a time to tear down, and a time to build.

4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn, and a time to dance.

5 A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them;

a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces.

6 A time to seek, and a time to lose;

a time to keep, and a time to cast away.

7 A time to rend, and a time to sew;

a time to be silent, and a time to speak.

8 A time to love, and a time to hate;

a time of war, and a time of peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Bolding is mine.
 
I have to say, I agree. I went to a young man’s protestant funeral once who had committed suicide. The sermon was, IMO, worthless. It had all of the (paraphrasing) it doesn’t matter how he died, he had been saved as a young man and is now in heaven. That does nothing to help a family, or the man who died. So one protestant preacher is of the opinion he is saved. So much better to explain God’s mercey, the need for prayers for the dead, give the family a means of still helping their son. What do you want in your grief? The knowledge that you can still help the family member who has died.
 
An old school southern baptist funeral might be different. There they tend to see the funeral as an opportunity to talk about how important salvation is. They tend to actually preach and see funerals as an opportunity to reach the unsaved while they have time. Of course they get it wrong with the idea of faith alone. But at least they try.

In my social circle I find most people find the southern baptist funeral abhorrent. Almost everyone has the opinion that funerals are the place to talk about how great the person was. God is mentioned but it is presumed that He has welcomed the person into Heaven. At several funerals I’ve known the person actually rejected the Christian Faith. Apparently that doesn’t matter to God.
 
From the homily . . . .
yes, there is hope in eternity even for those who take
their own lives.
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Thank you Father for holding out hope in your excellent homily in such a terrible situation.

God bless.

Cathoholic
 
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