PMS, arguments and mood swings

  • Thread starter Thread starter gardenswithkids
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Most men are as dumb as a box of hair when it comes to understanding hormones and the effect on the mind and body. I wish all those who believe we’re acting poorly on purpose could experience what it’s like for just one hour. Of course, that would probably result in the destruction of the world, so I’d settle for them cracking a book and doing some research, instead of ignorantly speculating on the many flaws of the weaker sex :rolleyes:
 
Find the book Fertility, Cycles, and Nutrition. You can get it from the CCL website. It will help termendously for you to be in good health and not suffering too much from PMS (the book also has good hints for nutrition during pregnancy and nursing).

For the arguements, you really need to decide what bothers you enough to try and fix and what you can let go of. If you decide you can let go of something, then that means all the time–not just when you are sunny.

If you want to deal with it, then you need to call the offenders on it all the time. You need to discuss the behavior with your kids and/or husband, tell them what bothers you, discuss how it can change, and back it up. Just like you would with anything else.

We all have moods, and I know PMS can be particularly bad, but we NONE of us have the right to lash out, whine, cry, make others miserable just because we don’t feel well. And that includes all not feeling well.
 
Back to the original post, as I wrote while the arguments and tears are not effective, what bothers me most during that time are things that always bother me. I normally simply put up with them without saying anything. I wonder if the situation might be improved if spoke up before the emotions hit?
Absolutely! Just like with your kids. It always helps to talk about it when you are calm. Pick a time during your cycle when you feel good and discuss stuff with your husband. If it isn’t worth talking about it then, then it isn’t something you should take out on him when you aren’t feeling well.
 
I used to have horrible mood swings, especially around my menstrual cycle changes. However, when I mentioned these mood swings to my doctor, she said that medication really does the trick. I went on Abilify and haven’t gotten mad at my husband since, period or no period. Try it, it works.
It is worth it to have a peaceful, tranquil home, and I have noticed NO side effects.
 
This has been one amazing side effect of my hysterectomy–no PMS!!😃 I swear, I haven’t been this even in my moods ever. It’s so wonderful. A bit extreme, so I don’t recommend it, but still, I’ve got to look at the bright side!

I used to get really mad at DH and at my coworkers for little things. Things that normally I could brush off or ignore, because they weren’t a big deal and I could handle, but that time of the month would just get to me.

The best thing I found was realizing that I was being irrational, that 25 days out of the month whatever didn’t bother me, so I needed to calm down. It didn’t help how I felt, but I found I could control my reaction to situations.
 
Wanna know what I think???:eek: Sometimes it is not a hormone thing… people are so annoying spometimes they DESERVE to be chewed out!! Heehee!!👍 :rolleyes:
 
This has been one amazing side effect of my hysterectomy–no PMS!!😃 I swear, I haven’t been this even in my moods ever. It’s so wonderful. A bit extreme, so I don’t recommend it, but still, I’ve got to look at the bright side!

I used to get really mad at DH and at my coworkers for little things. Things that normally I could brush off or ignore, because they weren’t a big deal and I could handle, but that time of the month would just get to me.

The best thing I found was realizing that I was being irrational, that 25 days out of the month whatever didn’t bother me, so I needed to calm down. It didn’t help how I felt, but I found I could control my reaction to situations.
Exactly! This is what I always strive for and what I’m taeaching my dd. This is the lesson we teach in almost every other situation–just because you are tired, hungry, mad at something else–so I applied it to PMS also. And as I said before the suggestions in Fertility, Cycles, and Nutrition madke a world of difference!
 
Not true, especially when you admit that you can get emotionally out of control and you lash out at him, how can he be responsible for the fight if you start it :confused:
**
It takes TWO people to have a fight. If he was being rational and in control then it would not be a “fight”.

Malia**
 
Maybe this is off topic, but I find if I exercise and take my good vitamins, I’m much better! —KCT
 
Maybe this is off topic, but I find if I exercise and take my good vitamins, I’m much better! —KCT
Me, too, KCT. I’m just having a lot of trouble finding time to exercise.

I agree with the ladies who are finding that their pms symptoms get worse as they age. I’m 38 and I don’t remember ever having these problems when I was younger. But, like Gardens, I’ve spend a significant number of years pregnant and breastfeeding with no cycles.

One of my friends told me that menopause is wonderful because now she is on an even keel. Maybe we should view menopause as a gift from God after years of hormonal shifts.

My poor dh. When I’m pms(es) or even on my period, he’ll say things with great sympathy like “Aunt Flo getting you down?”

That makes me so mad!!!:mad:

He can’t win.
 
Dont be rude…unless YOU menustrate, then you really can’t put your condesending two cents into this can you??? Women have to deal with this normally every month, some of us have it easier , some harder. I think we try to help ourselves as much as possible and we dont really need someone who cant (or if you are female and dont have this issue) menustrate basically saying “its your fault”. Get a grip…hubbys CAN be annoying at times ya know???
Oh Pleeease! Are you seriously saying that unless I menstruate my opinion about this doesn’t count? Everyone around the female who is menstruating has to deal with this. I have two teenage daughter plus my wife and all of them seem to think that just because of this monthly occurance it gives them license to make life hell for the rest of the family. Obviously I can be annoying at times (like right now) but why would differing levels of pain be metered out as punishment for my offenses solely based upon what part to her cycle is controlling our lives at the moment. I have already started (with my DW’s approval) educating my daughters in the fact that when they are adults they cannot lay in bed and do nothing for one week out of each month so learn to deal with it. I will admit limited success with this approach so far but its either that or the entire household would shut down most of the month waiting for the limited time that its OK to be around them.

I would be the first to admit that guys can be and are jerks sometimes. I would also admit that my DW has to put up with many of my habits that bug her. But isn’t that normal in a marriage? Also does anyone really think that women have no annoying habits that bother their husbands other than PMS and related grumpiness?
 
**
It takes TWO people to have a fight. If he was being rational and in control then it would not be a “fight”.

Malia**
I disagree. It does not take two people to fight. If one person is set on fighting and is going to interpret everything in an antagonistic manner, it really only takes one person. If the other person is being rational but at the same time not going to say the sky is orange when they know it is blue, there can still be a fight. Even if the calm rational person doesn’t want to argue about it, they can still be bullied and yelled at and called names if they do not agree to the irrational person’s point of view.

I think as women, we need to know where in our cycle we are, and we really need to just back off whenever possible. I mean it is great if those around you are understanding, but just because one is PMSing is not a blanket excuse to be mean and argumentative. It’s not any more of an excuse than when an abusive husband is angry because he thinks his wife means something offensive when she is just saying dinner is ready. Just because he might be somewhat insane, it does not excuse his behavior and the way he treats those whom he should love. And really we should just be thankful that our bouts with such extreme emotion are short-lived, go away, and when they do return it is at a time that we can completely predict.
 
Oh Pleeease! Are you seriously saying that unless I menstruate my opinion about this doesn’t count? Everyone around the female who is menstruating has to deal with this. I have two teenage daughter plus my wife and all of them seem to think that just because of this monthly occurance it gives them license to make life hell for the rest of the family. Obviously I can be annoying at times (like right now) but why would differing levels of pain be metered out as punishment for my offenses solely based upon what part to her cycle is controlling our lives at the moment. I have already started (with my DW’s approval) educating my daughters in the fact that when they are adults they cannot lay in bed and do nothing for one week out of each month so learn to deal with it. I will admit limited success with this approach so far but its either that or the entire household would shut down most of the month waiting for the limited time that its OK to be around them.

I would be the first to admit that guys can be and are jerks sometimes. I would also admit that my DW has to put up with many of my habits that bug her. But isn’t that normal in a marriage? Also does anyone really think that women have no annoying habits that bother their husbands other than PMS and related grumpiness?
ughhh~Never said we wanted to lay around and not function for a week…You can have 20 daughters, you still would not understand what WE are feeling emotionally and physically…yes we try our very best to function even though our bodies are out of wack for a few days, so dont act like every woman uses pms as a handicap 'cause we dont…a little understanding wouldnt be out of order ya know???:cool: 🤷
 
**Guilty of the PMS/mood swing thing. :blushing: And I need my one WHOLE ENTIRE week of it too! So…everyone watch out! 😉 😛 😃 **
 
I have already started (with my DW’s approval) educating my daughters in the fact that when they are adults they cannot lay in bed and do nothing for one week out of each month so learn to deal with it.
My dad was a jerk in a lot of ways, but I’m so glad he never educated me on why I couldn’t lay in bed while hemmoraging and literally passing out from the pain, even while on vicodin.
 
Oh Pleeease! Are you seriously saying that unless I menstruate my opinion about this doesn’t count? Everyone around the female who is menstruating has to deal with this. I have two teenage daughter plus my wife and all of them seem to think that just because of this monthly occurance it gives them license to make life hell for the rest of the family. Obviously I can be annoying at times (like right now) but why would differing levels of pain be metered out as punishment for my offenses solely based upon what part to her cycle is controlling our lives at the moment. I have already started (with my DW’s approval) educating my daughters in the fact that when they are adults they cannot lay in bed and do nothing for one week out of each month so learn to deal with it. I will admit limited success with this approach so far but its either that or the entire household would shut down most of the month waiting for the limited time that its OK to be around them.

I would be the first to admit that guys can be and are jerks sometimes. I would also admit that my DW has to put up with many of my habits that bug her. But isn’t that normal in a marriage? Also does anyone really think that women have no annoying habits that bother their husbands other than PMS and related grumpiness?
I do not blame my husband for my PMS issues. Nor do I “lay around” unless the pain is extreme. It’s hard to explain to people who can not or do not experience it. It’s like someone gave you are drug that makes you feel foggy, out of sorts, weepy and short tempered. I am an easy going, generally mild person. It is upsetting for me to feel so out of sorts.

Honestly I’m so glad my husband is much more compassionate than the men that have posted on this thread. Ofcourse I have annoying habits. What most of the women are saying is those annoying little things that normally we’d over look as spouses generally do, inexplicably feel magnified causing an (unwanted and unintended) over reaction. I always end up apologizing. And my hubby just has learned to be more sensitive to my feelings during that time.

It really isn’t helpful to basically say “get over yourself”. If you can not contribute in a positive way to the OP’s situation maybe you should be helpful and refrain from posting on something you can not relate to.

God Bless.🙂
 
You guys better watch out!! If you aren’t compassionate to us pms women, you might have to spend your purgatory pmsing. 😛

Just kidding!

stupid Eve. I blame her for all this nonsense. :mad:
 
Really!! The male posters have been way less than “Christian” with their responses…They really should button it up especially when they have absolutely no idea what we go through…🤷
 
Really!! The male posters have been way less than “Christian” with their responses…They really should button it up especially when they have absolutely no idea what we go through…🤷
I am a female poster and I “go through it” too–although I admit not every month. I still say that it gives us no excuse to shout, be pouty, or otherwise ugly to the people around us. Women who have PMS should do all the can nutritionally, with exercise, etc to improve the situation. And maybe you’ll still need a ‘red tent’ day or two. But, it is better for all to say, “I’m really not feeling well, let’s have take out for dinner, I’m going to lay down” then to snap and snarl and then excuse this because “I’m PMSing.” God calls us to be loving and charitable at all times–even when we have PMS, even when our car broke down, even when we are dying of cancer. Ask Mary to help you. She was only pregnant and nursing once in her life–and while I don’t think she suffered from PMS–I’m sure she understands about womenly issues!!!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top