Practical modesty

[EasterJoy]

And what if my husband tells me, while i’m wearing an outfit that is modest and that he likes, “hey, you look great today.” Shouldn’t that be a good thing? Or should I go dress in a potato sack so he won’t notice me?

Ideally, we should dress modestly enough that our neighbors won’t be tempted to covet our bodies, and nicely enough that if we ask our husbands how we look, they won’t have to choose between honesty and kindness!!

 

[Brenda_V]

Or should I go dress in a potato sack so he won’t notice me?

I can just see that sweet neighbor of yours trying to say something nice with you in a potato sack!

I never thought of layering my t-shirts with tanks but only recently have I been able to even buy the tanks in my size (I tend to the large size everywhere, and am well proportioned no matter my weight). I have thought of using Cami’s but then on another thread on the same topic one of our male posters asked what we thought we were trying to do wearing those lacy cami’s because they are very sexy.

I do like Target’s Merona and Cherokee shirts which is what I tend to end up with mostly because of the low-cut problem!

Brenda V.

 

[SeekerJen]

I never thought of layering my t-shirts with tanks but only recently have I been able to even buy the tanks in my size (I tend to the large size everywhere, and am well proportioned no matter my weight). I have thought of using Cami’s but then on another thread on the same topic one of our male posters asked what we thought we were trying to do wearing those lacy cami’s because they are very sexy.

I was wondering about that. So now we’re no longer allowed to wear lace, huh? I’m assuming this includes even the camis that have a little bit of lace trim at the top. I think that’s very pretty and feminine, but apparently it’s inappropriate.

 

[kage_ar]

I kind of like this one:
http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/yhst-14955292251721_2003_6369976

from this web site:denimskirts.com/tafllojesk2.html

Ugh - looks like something from Project Runway that would just not be practical in real life.

 

[SeekerJen]

Ugh - looks like something from Project Runway that would just not be practical in real life.

Yeah…it’s cute, but only tall, thin women could pull off that style. I’m 5 feet tall and curvy, so there’s no way. I’d have to hack several inches off the bottom, and to get it to fit my hips it would be too big in the waist.

 

[kage_ar]

If you receive compliments because of your clothes, change them. Try to pass unnoticed.

Actually, Christ taught us to be a light in the darkness, to be salt to the earth - we are SUPPOSED to be noticed! We are taught to wash our face and anoint our heads (old fashioned speak for looking well groomed and put together) when we fast.

Where did Christ or His Church tell us to be unnoticed?

 

[SeekerJen]

If you receive compliments because of your clothes, change them. Try to pass unnoticed.

If being noticed was a bad thing, I doubt the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist would wear the habits that they do. Their motherhouse is in the same city as my school, and I’ve ridden the bus with sisters from this convent on a few occasions. You can’t help but notice them. They look so pure and holy in their spotless white habits; they are truly beautiful to behold. You almost expect to see halos over their heads.

 

[SarahR]

Love that skirt!
I prefer longer jeans too, I just pair them with tallish (4") wedges or thicker heels. That puts me at a whopping 5 9", and the hem of my jeans just skims the ground. Plus it makes me look a little thinner, yay.
Same problem mentioned as someone above, with the scoop neck tops, same solution with a tank top or cami underneath.

Lace trimmed camis bad ? I must have missed that thread.

Anyone else struggle with having some God-endowed extra up top? I can’t find a solution that doesn’t make me look like I’m trying to ‘put it all out there’…that’s the problem I wish I could find a modest solution for. Even a large sized top looks conspicuous…and then frumpy to boot.

 

[Brenda_V]

Love that skirt!
I prefer longer jeans too, I just pair them with tallish (4") wedges or thicker heels. That puts me at a whopping 5 9", and the hem of my jeans just skims the ground. Plus it makes me look a little thinner, yay.
Same problem mentioned as someone above, with the scoop neck tops, same solution with a tank top or cami underneath.

Lace trimmed camis bad ? I must have missed that thread.

Anyone else struggle with having some God-endowed extra up top? I can’t find a solution that doesn’t make me look like I’m trying to ‘put it all out there’…that’s the problem I wish I could find a modest solution for. Even a large sized top looks conspicuous…and then frumpy to boot.

I liked that skirt too I just can’t imagine working in it.

I can’t tell you when and even which forum the cami comment was made in but it did make me think - especially since I have seen some bras that look like lace trimmed camis so you don’t have to wear one.

Question for those of you who layer - doesn’t it get hot in the summers? I layer often in the winters and in the evenings here in the Southwest but in other parts of the US where it is more humid or the temps. are a lot higher than where I live I can’t imagine two layers in the summers! When I talk about layering in the evenings I mean I add a light button up sweater or hoodie because once the sun sets in the desert it does get cool to downright cold!

Brenda V.

 

[dixieagle]

Shirts are hard. I tend to find the most modest ones at Target, I think they’re the Cherokee crew neck t shirts. In fall and winter they have long-sleeved ones, which I love and wear as often as I can.

I LOVE the Cherokee brand shirts - really nice quality at a good price.

I have no problem with longer denim skirts, but jumpers
I vowed never to wear them after graduating from Catholic school and I have kept my word

 

[dove51]

It’s so hard trying to dress modestly these days. Long skirts are very hard to find, and it’s even harder to find ones that don’t look badly on me. And lately I’ve been really wanting to wear head coverings, but I would feel too strange and obvious. I just wish I lived in the days when this sort of clothing was common and acceptable.

visionsofjesuschrist.com/weeping584.jpg

That said, I think it’s going to be my summer resolution to try and find more skirts. Thanks for posting this thread and reminding me. I haven’t worn a skirt in months!

 

[EasterJoy]

I was wondering about that. So now we’re no longer allowed to wear lace, huh? I’m assuming this includes even the camis that have a little bit of lace trim at the top. I think that’s very pretty and feminine, but apparently it’s inappropriate.

Come, now! Who said no lace? What’s a mantilla, but a whole lot of lace? Did any of the ladies here make her First Holy Communion sans lace or anything else that one could describe as “pretty”?

There is nothing wrong with pretty, and there are many innocent uses for lace. Avoid provocative, avoid vain, avoid seductive, avoid too much self-indulgence, but don’t be afraid of pretty!

 

[ChooseLove]

some men can get turned on by anything dress how you feel comfortable. please NO potato sacks, lol, unless they have some lace on the edges, lol

 

[CarrieH]

Have any ladies here just worn skirts, no pants or shorts, for a long time? And do you find it’s hard to do all your daily chores? I’m a SAHM and homeschooler, and often am out gardening or doing other outside work.

I wear skirts almost all the time during the warmer-weather months. They are much cooler than pants or capris, and much more modest than shorts. I have bought several denim skirts at the thrift stores over the years. They are kind of hard to find in the regular stores, unless you shop online. I don’t find it at all difficult to do my daily chores, although I don’t have any little ones to keep up with. In fact, I’m more comfortable doing my daily routine in a baggy dress than I am in a t-shirt and jeans.

I have found the same reaction, that I am treated more politely out in public, esp. by men, when I am wearing a skirt or dress. I have noticed the same when my hair is longer, too.

When I first started wearing dresses again, I was in the grocery store one day when it was really hot. All around me were scantily-clad females, some wearing as little as a bikini top and shorts. I had on my favorite modest, baggy cotton dress. An elderly man stopped me and said, “I just wanted to tell you, it’s so nice to see a lady in a dress.” So people do notice these things.

 

[catherineajt]

I LOVE the Cherokee brand shirts - really nice quality at a good price.

I have no problem with longer denim skirts, but jumpers
I vowed never to wear them after graduating from Catholic school and I have kept my word

Oh, my high school didn’t have jumpers. We had an odd sort of dress with three box pleats down the front, made from nearly any material we wanted, with a Peter Pan collar attached with a pin, and a cloth belt.

Now it’s dresses I don’t like to wear. Jumpers aren’t a problem for me.

 

[TraderTif]

I’ve been struggling with this for months. I can’t seem to find anything in the dress/skirt/jumper category that doesn’t make me look…er…dumpy.

I’m tall, and quite “plus-sized”, so I’m not expecting to look like a runway model…but all the skirts seem to make me look so much bigger then I look in pants! Why is that?

Are there any particular styles that might be more flattering for a big person? Because I really want to add some “femimine” into my wardrobe, lol.

 

[Just_wondering]

One thing I like about Korea is that women wear dresses and skirts pretty regularly, so I’ve gotten in the habit of wearing them, especially in the summer. Some women’s skirts are a little short - :bigyikes: - but most of them are modest and pretty. Also, layered tops are all the rage, so not much cleavage. Still can’t get dresses that aren’t sleeveless, though, and it’s culturally inappropriate to show your upper arms.

I wear skirts and dresses three or four times a week in the summer, and once or twice a week in the winter.

 

[gettingthere]

I’ve been struggling with this for months. I can’t seem to find anything in the dress/skirt/jumper category that doesn’t make me look…er…dumpy.

I’m tall, and quite “plus-sized”, so I’m not expecting to look like a runway model…but all the skirts seem to make me look so much bigger then I look in pants! Why is that?

Are there any particular styles that might be more flattering for a big person? Because I really want to add some “femimine” into my wardrobe, lol.

I hear ya!
Personally, I think dresses are more flattering on me because they create the image of a smooth line. That said, it’s REALLY hard to find modest dresses!

If you want to wear skirts, don’t get clingy fabric. I tend to like heavier fabrics (but not thick, just a firm fabric) that is more a tulip shape or one that flutes out from the hips. Then wear a top that comes down to the hip area. It would create a smoother line, instead of breaking you up into “chunks” (at least that’s what I’ve found with my own body).

As for pants looking better than skirts, that’s just because pants create one long line from the waist to the feet, whereas skirts break you into pieces at the waist, then at the end of the skirt. I find if I want a skirt, I often look better in a dress… but pants are usually the way to go.

 

[gettingthere]

I never thought of layering my t-shirts with tanks but only recently have I been able to even buy the tanks in my size (I tend to the large size everywhere, and am well proportioned no matter my weight).

Brenda V.

I get my tanks from Old Navy. I wear an XL there and sizes go up to XXL. I find the tanks there are longer, plus they are cheaper than many other places. And they have tons of colors.

 

[Brenda_V]

I’m tall, and quite “plus-sized”, so I’m not expecting to look like a runway model…but all the skirts seem to make me look so much bigger then I look in pants! Why is that?

Are there any particular styles that might be more flattering for a big person? Because I really want to add some “femimine” into my wardrobe, lol.

I am a plus size and don’t look dumpy in skirts. I think the main thing is flowy skirts or a-lines work best for us and if you have a definite waste look for shirts that will hit you there as opposed to at the hips- it will accentuate your curves without being immodest.

You did get your answer about why pants are more “slimming” so to speak but like I said, I look good in skirts as well as pants .

I get my tanks from Old Navy. I wear an XL there and sizes go up to XXL. I find the tanks there are longer, plus they are cheaper than many other places. And they have tons of colors.

Unfortunately plus size generally means larger than Old Navy’s XXL - that is generally a Junior’s size and in Junior’s I am a XXXL, yup, there is such a size! Old Navy sometimes does have that size too but not always. My favorite stores are Lane Bryant and Target for IRL shopping and JMS (Just My Size) for on-line shopping but I can find some nice stuff at JCP too but have to be careful there as their Plus Size is as often styled to say “look at me, I’m fat!” The other places are stylish too - you know, there are many styles I can get by in that skinny girls wear too.

Brenda V.