C
chevalier
Guest
Before reading what others wrote: You don’t “lose” anything by responding. In fact, you can practice polite writing even (or rather especially, depending on perspective) the content of your message is going to come down to thank you but no.So I was at a weekend retreat for Catholic youth…Right before the retreat ended this girl, who I hadn’t talked to all weekend, gave me her phone number and requested that I text her.
If this had happened anywhere else, I would have thrown the piece of paper away. However, it happened at a Catholic retreat. Part of me says since it happened at a Catholic retreat, I should at least get to know her (I wouldn’t actually start dating her until I had gotten to know her better). Just because she was at a Catholic retreat doesn’t mean she was there willingly, but according to her name tag, she had been there before. It’s not the type of retreat you go to again if you don’t like it.
I discussed this with two female friends. One said to ignore it; the other said that it would be “polite” to respond.
Thoughts?
Secondly, please note that at this day and age women need to be more active if they don’t want to remain single, Catholics in general need to be more active if they are to find someone with compatible beliefs (a while ago at least Protestants believed what we did about fornication, contraception etc.). And she only asked you to text her, in which she wasn’t excessively forward. (I certainly have engaged in more overt fishing as a man and I suspect you have also.
All in all, I am of the mostly unanimous opinion that you should write.
Now, after reading what others said: you can control the tempo in which the relationship (or non-relationship) develops. You can say you’re not comfortable sharing this information or doing that thing with her or talking about X. Women do that all the time.
Besides, it’s possible she has some common sense about her and isn’t promising herself too much too fast. Perhaps she saw you as a guy worth learning more about, not necessarily a fast-track to a relationship (especially if she’s a responsible girl).