Sexual Denial, and Sin

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

Actually, no. I have intentionally stayed away from anything even remotely close to compulsive or addictive. I do not use drugs or tobacco, and I drink alcohol only occasionally. I do not gamble or spend excessive amounts of money. And I could afford to lose a few LBs, like most middle-aged men, but I do not consider myself a compulsive eater.

My father, mother, and sister all had (or have) some form of substance-abuse problem. My father drank himself to death. My mother was addicted to Oxycontin pills, while she was dying in the nursing home. And my sister is presently a drug user, living in a small town in Idaho. So addictive behaviors have taken an enormous toll, on all the members of my family of origin. That is why I have consciously tried to avoid them, throughout my adult life.

How have I survived all these years in these circumstances? Prayer. I pray every Sunday, before high mass, for God to open my wife’s heart. It never happens, but that doesn’t mean that it won’t happen tomorrow. Or the next day. Or next year.

So I keep praying and praying. I just pray that God someday answers my prayers.

You probably don’t feel like one, but you are an inspiration. Even though it has taken you some time to realize that you need to act, you have spent long long years staying strong in your faith and not allowing yourself to become destructive with any form of addiction. You are the only stable role model your children have…God bless you…and keep praying for a miracle. I will too.

 

[Kepha15]

Here is the latest update on my situation. My other thread, “Marriage is Misery - bottom line” - was forcibly closed. I think I said something in that thread, to anger the administrators, so they shut it off. Somehow, they interpreted my statements as suicidal (which I am not.) Here is that thread:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=286458

Yes, I did try to take back my bedroom, as one of the previous posters in this thread suggested. No, that did not have the desired effect. In fact, it had the opposite effect. My wife is even more angry with me than before.** I now sleep on a couch, in the family room of my own home. ** I am learning the fine art, of how to make a couch comfortable enough to sleep on.

I continue to sink more effort into this failed marriage. It is like trying to bail out the sinking Titanic with nothing but a Sham-Wow towel.

The latest method I am using is the “Love Dare” approach. This method was popularized by the “Fireproof” movie that was released earlier this year., This was recommended to me by my marriage counselor (whom my wife still refuses to see.) It is not having much effect so far. It is a 40-day program, and I am only about 20% complete with it, so far. I will see what happens with this approach.** Perhaps God can work a miracle. **

I have seen the clergy in my parish.Their recommendation: 1) my marriage is dead; 2) I have solid grounds for annulment; 3) I need to preserve my own faith life, at all costs; 4) ultimately, I must do what is best for the faith life of my children, as well.

I will see a family lawyer next week. I am not ready to file for divorce yet. But I am convinced my wife is. If I am served papers, I will ask for my lawyer to have a response.

That is my update. More information soon…

Thank you all for your prayers and support.

Although of course I don’t know the situation as well as you do, and I can only go off of what you are saying here, I don’t see how taking back your bedroom could have failed. You have to go in there with the idea of not caring what she thinks, says or does to you because of it. The idea is not to get her to suddenly warm up to you because you went back in your room. The idea is to send the message that you won’t be bullied around any more. You don’t even need to say anything to her. Just simply go into the room, and don’t leave when she tells you to. The only way you should leave that bedroom is if she physically tries to harm you (then by all means, leave the room and call the police).

By going and not leaving no matter what she says, you are sending a very powerful message to her. If she doesn’t want to sleep in the same room as you, SHE can be the one to go sleep on the couch. You have to endure this fight, and be prepared that it’s not going to be easy, or pretty. But if you go in with the stubborn attitude that nothing she can say or do will get you to physically leave that room, there is no reason you should end up sleeping on the couch. I pray that you have the strength to do this.

 

[mrpathetic]

How did it fail: by my mother-and-law coming over to the house the next day, so she and her daughter can tag-team me. That is why I caved in. They gave me a scream-down like you wouldn’t believe. I had to sit there for two hours and take it.

My mother-in-law produced evidence that she had bought the bed. She had actually purchased it last summer - not my wife. Ergo, she demonstrated that it belonged to her, and that she could decide who slept in it, or not. (Naturally, I was not informed of this transaction, until I actually tried sleeping in the bed.) I suspect that my MIL paid for the bed, because my wife has destroyed her credit rating (more on that later.)

She actually kep the receipt from the purchase, so she could document that it was her property, and she could do with it, as she wishes. She is adamant that I should not sleep in the same bed as her daughter. (My mother-in-law blames me for her daughter’s fallaway from the Catholic faith - although I don’t see how that can be true. My wife decides not to attend church, or pray, or do anything required by the Catholic faith.)

I tried a logical, rational, open-minded discussion with these people. I tried negotiating straightforwardly with them. I tried asking for some portion of the bed - after all, I pay for the home where it is located. No good. They are both insistent that I go nowhere near the bed where my wife sleeps. I tried a similar negotiation that morning on other points - with no results.

======================================

Now here’s one of the ironic parts: One of the exercises from the “Love Dare” book is the following:

“Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you.”

Guess what was the #1 item that my wife put on the list? Me going near her bed.

=======================================

Bottom line: I am facing an insane, dysfunctional, hopeless situation here. I am trying to pray my way out of it. I am trying to take constructive action, to make things better. I am trying to be patient, and hope for the miracle to come. I don’t know how much longer I can hold out.

 

[Galnextdoor]

Have you thought about buying two twin beds to put in the master bedroom? Remove her bed if you feel uncomfortable about sleeping in a bed purchased by your mother-in-law. If you get two twin beds, you will probably sleep much better than sleeping on the couch. Your entitled to sleep in the master bedroom since you are the master of the house.

When my husband and I were together, it came to the point where he didn’t want to sleep with me. At first, I slept on the couch. Then I decided that since I wasn’t the one with the problem, he could sleep on the couch. He wouldn’t sleep on the couch. He took my young son’s bed. I didn’t like my son sleeping on the couch, so I purchased two twin beds. I slept in one and my young son slept in the other. Eventually, my husband decided to sleep in the same room with me in a twin bed. Everything was okay, as long as I didn’t show skin and stayed in my twin bed. I wasn’t flat chested and skinny anymore and that grossed him out.

Since she’s the one with the problem, you should try what I did and see what happens. Don’t let her know what you are going to do, just do it. If she brings her mother over to tag team, just say you are entitled to sleep in the master bedroom. Don’t respond to any of the ugliness or blame they try to put on you. Just say what you have to say and walk away.

 

[Black_Dog]

I’ve just read all of this thread and I dont know whom I’m angrier with the OP or is wife. It reads like a bad plot from a TV soap opera. That’s not a marriage - that’s living hell you’re describing. Your wife is systematically and deliberately destroying you. Walk away from it. It’ll be tough to begin with but with the right kind of support you will be able to rebuild your life and more importantly rebuild your self esteem. Your kids are old enough to understand the reasons why you and your wife can no longer live together and you’ll probably be able to build a much better relationship with them once you are by yourself.and not being treated like a door mat.

I know that is all very easy to say but it is based on personal experience. I too was in a marriage very similar to the one you’ve described where my spouse, whilst constantly adopting the high moral ground, seemingly took a malicious delight in breaking me bit by bit over the years. Believe me it’s better to live a chaste life on your own than go through daily hell and humiliation.

 

[TLDenmark]

Dear kind and patient Husband

My mother-in-law produced evidence that she had bought the bed. She had actually purchased it last summer - not my wife. Ergo, she demonstrated that it belonged to her, and that she could decide who slept in it, or not. (Naturally, I was not informed of this transaction, until I actually tried sleeping in the bed.) I suspect that my MIL paid for the bed, because my wife has destroyed her credit rating (more on that later.)

She actually kep the receipt from the purchase, so she could document that it was her property, and she could do with it, as she wishes. She is adamant that I should not sleep in the same bed as her daughter. (My mother-in-law blames me for her daughter’s fallaway from the Catholic faith - although I don’t see how that can be true. My wife decides not to attend church, or pray, or do anything required by the Catholic faith.)

Tell your mother-in-law, that you want her bed out of YOUR bedroom. Inform her that she have X number if days to remove her bed from YOUR property, or you will do it for her (consider getting legal advice before going trough with the treat). Buy a new bed, so your “wife” can either move back to her parents (I wonder what her mom will say, when she realize her daughter is a lesbian), sleep on the couch, or sleep in the same bed as you.

I tried a logical, rational, open-minded discussion with these people. I tried negotiating straightforwardly with them. I tried asking for some portion of the bed - after all, I pay for the home where it is located. No good. They are both insistent that I go nowhere near the bed where my wife sleeps. I tried a similar negotiation that morning on other points - with no results.

That is the reason why you failed, it is impossible to reason or negotiating with that sort of people. You must insist that you own the bedroom, and force them into negotiating with you.

God bless you
TL

 

[dianaballein]

Hello. In no way would I advocate divorce, but please realize that your wife has abandoned you. Just because she lives in the same home as you does not mean that she isn’t acting like your marriage is over.

I think at this point, if you were to physically separate it would be to protect your assets and your self. You are not obligated to stay in an abusive situation, and she is emotionally abusing you.

Please discuss this with your priest.

I am so sorry that you are going through this.

AMEN

 

[Salonika]

mrpathetic:

How did it fail: by my mother-and-law coming over to the house the next day, so she and her daughter can tag-team me. That is why I caved in. They gave me a scream-down like you wouldn’t believe. I had to sit there for two hours and take it.

Two against one won’t work - two brains can come up more ways of ensuring their success and one can think while the other talks. Just because they won this round doesn’t mean that they are correct or will win long term.

My mother-in-law produced evidence that she had bought the bed … Ergo, she demonstrated that it belonged to her, and that she could decide who slept in it, or not.

This is what a child would say not an adult.

My mother-in-law blames me for her daughter’s fallaway from the Catholic faith - although I don’t see how that can be true. My wife decides not to attend church, or pray, or do anything required by the Catholic faith.

Totally agree

I tried a logical, rational, open-minded discussion with these people. I tried negotiating straightforwardly with them.

Probably one of the hardest lessons that those of us who try this approach have to realise is that only works with those who are seeking the best outcome for all involved.

Also those of us who use this approach can be vulnerable because we consider what others wouldn’t consider - like the ownership of the bed - people using another approach might just laugh and say “you must be joking”.

Continuing to use logic with those who have an agenda of winning at all costs backfires on us - at least we become depressed and anxious and at worst fatalisitic.

Bottom line: I am facing an insane, dysfunctional, hopeless situation here. I am trying to pray my way out of it. I am trying to take constructive action, to make things better. I am trying to be patient, and hope for the miracle to come. I don’t know how much longer I can hold out.

This came to me out of the blue so to say - is there a way that you could go on a retreat (not a weekend but a a couple of weeks or more) so that you can have some time where you feel safe and can think about talk things over in a safe environment.

Suggest this because our ability to see solutions is affected by the type of battering you have been undergoing for so long.

Also please remember the progress you are making - it likely that the battering you are getting is a reflection of this progress - after all your wife had to get reinforcements this time.

 

[dianaballein]

Here is the latest update on my situation. My other thread, “Marriage is Misery - bottom line” - was forcibly closed. I think I said something in that thread, to anger the administrators, so they shut it off. Somehow, they interpreted my statements as suicidal (which I am not.) Here is that thread:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=286458

Yes, I did try to take back my bedroom, as one of the previous posters in this thread suggested. No, that did not have the desired effect. In fact, it had the opposite effect. My wife is even more angry with me than before.** I now sleep on a couch, in the family room of my own home. ** I am learning the fine art, of how to make a couch comfortable enough to sleep on.

I continue to sink more effort into this failed marriage. It is like trying to bail out the sinking Titanic with nothing but a Sham-Wow towel.

The latest method I am using is the “Love Dare” approach. This method was popularized by the “Fireproof” movie that was released earlier this year., This was recommended to me by my marriage counselor (whom my wife still refuses to see.) It is not having much effect so far. It is a 40-day program, and I am only about 20% complete with it, so far. I will see what happens with this approach.** Perhaps God can work a miracle. **

I have seen the clergy in my parish.Their recommendation: 1) my marriage is dead; 2) I have solid grounds for annulment; 3) I need to preserve my own faith life, at all costs; 4) ultimately, I must do what is best for the faith life of my children, as well.

I will see a family lawyer next week. I am not ready to file for divorce yet. But I am convinced my wife is. If I am served papers, I will ask for my lawyer to have a response.

That is my update. More information soon…

Thank you all for your prayers and support.

I will pray for you and for your children OP. Get the annulment…and find a nice Catholic woman who appreciates a good Catholic husband…and all that comes with it. She is out there just waiting to love and respect you, and to love and accept your children.

 

[Black_Dog]

I will pray for you and for your children OP. Get the annulment…and find a nice Catholic woman who appreciates a good Catholic husband…and all that comes with it. She is out there just waiting to love and respect you, and to love and accept your children.

Even if you dont go down the route of annulment it’s still possible to have a relationship with a good Catholic woman. I have exactly that. We discuss God and everything else under the sun. She is an amazing woman whom I would never have encountered had I stayed with my wife. It’s a big wide world out there - come and join us!

 

[chevalier]

Your boundary setting techniques did not backfire. They just brought everything out into the open. Our religion allows divorce;

I am sorry if I come across as pedantic or uncharitable, but our religion does not allow divorce. A civil divorce has no effect whatsoever on the sacramental marriage. The sacramental marriage exists and is not reduced to just an impediment from any future marriage.

 

[chevalier]

Dear Opening Poster,

You have been very loving and charitable and I agree with the view that you have been an inspiration as well.

The amount of pain you have been through must have been terrible, but you are in no way pathetic. Do not ever allow anyone to call you that, let alone yourself.

Put your foot down.

You basically need to tell her the abuse ends here and now. Here and now is as good as anywhere and any time.

You also need to take a solid role in your children’s lives. And you need to take control of your house and your money. You don’t need to help your wife do any jobs or do any other things that hurt you. You can help her in house chores if she does any and in her private matters, but not in things which are a part of her frenzy.

And once again, you do not need to accept that kind of conduct from her. What she does is not only immoral but also big time illegal.

Find a good lawyer. You may need to face a lot of bad things in the divorce court. You will need to fight for your children, at least for the daughter, since I understand the son is independent.

As for the validity of the marriage, I would be surprised if it proved valid. It would need to have been a complete change after marriage and I doubt people change like that, although there is always a possibility. You will need to talk to your priest about this - he will be able to point you to the right people. Canon lawyers such as the judges or the advocates sometimes give free advice and at any rate, they should be available for a meeting.

 

[Lost_Found]

I have seen the clergy in my parish.Their recommendation: 1) my marriage is dead; 2) I have solid grounds for annulment; 3) I need to preserve my own faith life, at all costs; 4) ultimately, I must do what is best for the faith life of my children, as well.

I will see a family lawyer next week. I am not ready to file for divorce yet. But I am convinced my wife is. If I am served papers, I will ask for my lawyer to have a response.

Thank you all for your prayers and support.

Dear Mr Patience -
Congratulations on finally glimpsing REALITY. You will eventually realize that reality is a better - not worse - place than you’ve been dwelling.
Your supernatural gift of patience should be used more constructively than you have been using it.
(Just as a matter of procedure you should ask your lawyer whether he intends to play goaltender or will there be any offense.)
You’re in our prayers brother. Keep us in yours - I know this sounds wrong to you, but you sound like a Saint!

 

[mrpathetic]

I am no saint. I am a sinner, just like every other member of this thread.

What sin have I committed? Not one of commission, but of omission. I should have taken a stand for my marriage, a long, long time ago. I was extremely weak and passive, to the point of being utterly spineless.

I rationalized the situation as follows. If I allow my wife to have virtually anything she wants, she won’t leave me. If she denies me sex year after year, that’s fine. If she spends us into the poor house, that’s fine. If she openly humiliates me in public, it’s fine. Having sexual relations with another woman? It’s all fine.

I just looked the other way, turned the other cheek - whatever it took, to prevent my marriage from ending.** I was so pathologically afraid of being lonely, and ending up single and miserable, that I tolerated the intolerable, year after year. **

What is the result of this weakness and passivity? Now my wife has given me “the ultimatum”. Either I can leave in two years, when the last of my children are grown, or I can leave now. I chose option A, because this gives me more time, to salvage this nearly hopeless situation.

So please, don’t call me a saint.** I have sins of omission that rivals the sins of commission of any arch-villain. **

I listened to one of Fr. Copapi’s sermons on EWTN last night. He talked about the 9 ways we can be accomplices to sin. One of the 9 ways is silence. I was silent, as my wife sinnrf, and continues to sin. A saint would put a stop to this. I am still trying to find the courage to do that. *So I am no saint. *

 

[Lost_Found]

Yeah sure, that’s what all the saints say

Alright, alright, you’re not a saint. But could you allow me to at least say you have the PATIENCE of a saint? Is that acceptable to you? Patience is part of the virtue of temperance. Could you not say that is your forte, that you put so many to shame in that department?
Mr Patience, I’m glad you spoke to clergy and therapists about this. I’m glad you are finally beginning to glimpse the light. Your question is finally about whether you are actually married - does your situation sound like what God intended as the sacrament of marriage? You shouldn’t take the Church’s position lightly on this matter, and it’s just beginning to appear that you are not married. Pray for the virtues of prudence and fortitude, you will build these since these are protected by your temperance.
Remember even with all of Jesus’ example and preaching, Judas and others still went off and did what they did so don’t think you can necessarily change others if it’s not in their hearts.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

Yeah sure, that’s what all the saints say

Alright, alright, you’re not a saint. But could you allow me to at least say you have the PATIENCE of a saint? Is that acceptable to you? Patience is part of the virtue of temperance. Could you not say that is your forte, that you put so many to shame in that department?
Mr Patience, I’m glad you spoke to clergy and therapists about this. I’m glad you are finally beginning to glimpse the light. Your question is finally about whether you are actually married - does your situation sound like what God intended as the sacrament of marriage? You shouldn’t take the Church’s position lightly on this matter, and it’s just beginning to appear that you are not married. Pray for the virtues of prudence and fortitude, you will build these since these are protected by your temperance.
Remember even with all of Jesus’ example and preaching, Judas and others still went off and did what they did so don’t think you can necessarily change others if it’s not in their hearts.

**I agree:thumbsup:

A saint wouldn’t just be able to “put a stop to it”. Like Lost&Found stated, even Jesus couldn’t (wouldn’t?) stop others from sinning…we all have free will. Your “wife” is exercising hers and now you will be doing the same. How do you know that the catalyst to her “changing” won’t be you finally leaving her? We have no idea what God has planned, only that we should cooperate. Seek His will and all will be ok. Prayers for you, and your whole family Mr.P(atience)**

 

[Kepha15]

I am no saint. I am a sinner, just like every other member of this thread.

What sin have I committed? Not one of commission, but of omission. I should have taken a stand for my marriage, a long, long time ago. I was extremely weak and passive, to the point of being utterly spineless.

I rationalized the situation as follows. If I allow my wife to have virtually anything she wants, she won’t leave me. If she denies me sex year after year, that’s fine. If she spends us into the poor house, that’s fine. If she openly humiliates me in public, it’s fine. Having sexual relations with another woman? It’s all fine.

I just looked the other way, turned the other cheek - whatever it took, to prevent my marriage from ending.** I was so pathologically afraid of being lonely, and ending up single and miserable, that I tolerated the intolerable, year after year. **

What is the result of this weakness and passivity? Now my wife has given me “the ultimatum”. Either I can leave in two years, when the last of my children are grown, or I can leave now. I chose option A, because this gives me more time, to salvage this nearly hopeless situation.

So please, don’t call me a saint.** I have sins of omission that rivals the sins of commission of any arch-villain. **

I listened to one of Fr. Copapi’s sermons on EWTN last night. He talked about the 9 ways we can be accomplices to sin. One of the 9 ways is silence. I was silent, as my wife sinnrf, and continues to sin. A saint would put a stop to this. I am still trying to find the courage to do that. *So I am no saint. *

Wow, your wife is pulling out all the stops, eh? Getting her mother to argue you out of YOUR bedroom. That’s pretty childish.

Your wife gave you two options: leave now or leave in two years. Seems pretty obvious to me there’s a third option not being offered: You don’t leave at all. If what you’re saying is true about you paying for the house, she’s got no authority whatsoever to tell you to leave, either your bedroom or your house.

So mother-in-law wins round one. On to round two. Like the other posters have suggested, I highly suggest you don’t let your wife win this fight over the bedroom. If she’s going to go first-grader on you with who “owns” the actual bed, bring another bed into the room. If you want to go so far as to remove “her” bed and put it someplace else, that’s up to you, but at least don’t let her kick you out of the master bedroom that you paid for. You’ve GOT to send a message that she can’t win this way.

I’ll keep praying for you, but please don’t give up. It sounds like you have a history of caving in when your wife puts you down, and this sounds like a classic example. YOU CAN’T LET HER WIN THIS ONE. If you do, you’re right back where you started.

 

[Salonika]

Congratulations, Mr Estimable, on the progress you are making about identifying why you have stayed in a marriage which has been so very, very unsatisfying for you for so long. We can’t change what we don’t acknowledge.

Think that sometimes recognising and acknowledging sins of ommission is harder than acknowledging sins of commission as we have to accept that we did not do anything. Also most societies are harder on people who do nothing than those who actively do something wrong.

Sometimes I think we are protected from home truths until we can handle them. Do you think that a year ago your could have handled realising that you were staying in your marriage because “I was so pathologically afraid of being lonely, and ending up single and miserable, that I tolerated the intolerable, year after year.”

As Christmas approaches I hope you will take some time to acknowledge the new life that is beginning to stir within you.

 

[RubyT]

Hello. In no way would I advocate divorce, but please realize that your wife has abandoned you. Just because she lives in the same home as you does not mean that she isn’t acting like your marriage is over.

I think at this point, if you were to physically separate it would be to protect your assets and your self. You are not obligated to stay in an abusive situation, and she is emotionally abusing you.

Please discuss this with your priest.

I am so sorry that you are going through this.

Mary nailed it, this is an abusive relationship. It is not healthy and she is draining you of your individual self. She sounds controlling and unloving. You deserve better treatment from her. IMO She is the pathetic one my friend, not you!

Don’t delay - Talk to the Priest.

It just burns my butt that good men are taken(married) by women who don’t appreciate them.

 

[mrpathetic]

Congratulations, Mr Estimable, on the progress you are making about identifying why you have stayed in a marriage which has been so very, very unsatisfying for you for so long. We can’t change what we don’t acknowledge.

Think that sometimes recognising and acknowledging sins of ommission is harder than acknowledging sins of commission as we have to accept that we did not do anything. Also most societies are harder on people who do nothing than those who actively do something wrong.

Sometimes I think we are protected from home truths until we can handle them. Do you think that a year ago your could have handled realising that you were staying in your marriage because “I was so pathologically afraid of being lonely, and ending up single and miserable, that I tolerated the intolerable, year after year.”

As Christmas approaches I hope you will take some time to acknowledge the new life that is beginning to stir within you.

Here is an update on my situation.

I had a series of blood tests done over the Christmas break. I normally do this, since I take some medications that require routine blood checks.

This year, I had the doctor include a testosterone check in the test. The results were startling. My raw testosterone count is 213, which is well below the acceptable levels for men in my age group.

My doctor has started me on testosterone replacement therapy, to address the situation. There are a number of serious, long-term health effects of low testosterone, including increased risk for diabetes, heart disease, Alzheimer’s, osteoporosis, and other serious effects. So this medical condition has to be addressed.

I watched my mother die in a nursing home, at a premature age, from 2 of these conditions. I have no intentions of doing the same. So I made the decision to start the hormone replacement therapy (HRT).

=========================================

The doctor was clear with me about one point: one of the culprits behind low testosterone is lack of sexual activity. When I told the doctor that I had not had sex in 15 years, he said that this was the obvious cause. (There could be other potential causes, such as pituitary tumor or a zinc deficiency, but he excluded those.) If you begin having sex, then stop in middle age, then the endocryne system simply shuts down production of testosterone - the endocrynologists call this “Andropause”. It is similar to menopause, but it occurs much more gradually in men.

My sexless marriage is ultimately the cause of all this. Now I am looking at the unfortunate consequences of this. Once you start HRT, you really cannot stop, or the hormone levels drop back down to the previous levels - or even lower. So barring some improvement in my sex life, I will be on this HRT regimen for years to come.

And even if I do enter into another marriage, and become sexually active again, there’s no guarantee that my body will begin producing these hormones again - once the endocryne system shuts off production of a hormone, it doesn’t necessarily start up again. So I could be looking at HRT therapy, for life.

==========================================

The moral of the story: ** do not allow your marriage to become sexless. **You too could experience the problems that I am facing. And it is no laughing matter. There are serious health consequences to this, and they cannot be ignored.

As always, I appreciate the support and prayers of the members of this forum. And if any of you have had similar experiences, and have learned to cope with them, please share them with me.

Thank you, and may God bless you.