Yes, treated as equals but also treated different. Men and women are equal but men and women are different.
Can you give me an example of “treated different”? If my daughter doesn’t want to be a mother, should I treat her differently? Should I admonish her? Is she defying her nature? Be specific here. I’m asking, because this sounds suspiciously like “separate but equal”, and some of the Church’s teachings seem to come close to this; as in, “oh sure, men and women are equal, but women are given the gift of motherhood, so that makes them different…” And from that seems to spin the notion that a woman who doesn’t want to be a mother is somehow defying her nature. She’s “equal”, for some subjective notion of equal, but it seems the preference is she be a mother.
Equal to me means that if a woman does not wish to be a mother, she should have exactly the same chance at outcomes in her working life as a man, that she cannot be discriminated against because someone think she should be a mother instead of, say, an engineer or a corporate executive.
The fact is that women are penalized for motherhood, if they have ambitions other than being a stay-at-home mom. They lose precious years of developing their career, while men have no such handicap, and this is where “they’re equal but different comes into play.” Motherhood is lauded, until the economic consequences are put forward, then suddenly a woman who either chooses not to have children or asks the question “Why should I be effectively punished for being a mother” comes up.
So let’s try to suss out what different means, beyond the obvious biological differences that two X chromosomes almost always leads to a womb.