Six reasons NOT to send your daughter to college

[Burt_Macklin]

Since you know these guys, what do you think of their statements? I, myself, find it ridiculous.

They don’t have any official standing in my parish and their ideas aren’t really coherent enough to attract any of my attention. I’ve just ignored them. Considering most of their videos had only 20-100 views before Jezebel posted to their website so did everyone else. They’ve just attracted attention because the poorly written articles and cheap polyester suits fit into the stereotype atheists like to hold of conservative catholics.

 

[fpt]

In catholicism, God gives some personal gifts (natural faculties) to each person, and each person has to use them, in the good way. For that, the parents are morally obliged of educating, of forming, of instructing, of making to grow up those faculties via the school and co.

**Thus, the simple fact of saying, " you are a girl (female human being), there are many reasons for not going to college " means that there is an ontological inferiority of the woman. That is not catholic. It is very awful. **

A monstrous intellectual approach is existing in those writings.

 

[Burt_Macklin]

And what about women who find out 20 years later they are not called to marriage? Live with mom and dad until they die and leave an inheritance? This presume everyone is called to marriage, which is not the case. And often, people do not know until later in life where they are called.

She would live with her parents and submit to her father until she could find a husband. If she doesn’t find a husband then she can become a religious and submit to her bishop. If she isn’t called to either one then she would still live with and be supported by her nearest male relative until her death. It’s very close to Bedouin Arab culture in that regard. Women are not to usurp the role of a man and it is always necessary that a woman have a man to submit to.

I’ve seen the idea come from Mr George Gil, Have our daughters been deceived? (spoiler, yes they have)

Dr. Baucham is a renowned Bible scholar as well as an author. In a televised interview he stated, “Scripture does not command the woman to become independent—it commands women to be submissive. Why, because part of the curse in Genesis chapter 3 was that Eve would have the desire not only for her husband, but also for her husband’s position. It was part of the fallen nature which was a result of what happened with our first parents that women would have this desire against the order which God ordained toward independence. So for me to foster that in my daughter is really for me to flirt with that very same thing that brought Eve down. So what I need to foster in my daughter, is not the sin to which she is prone, I need to foster the Biblical pattern that she must learn.

Instead of pursuing an independent career, Jasmin’s new objective is to join her family in fulfilling her new career of serving her father while waiting for the man God would send her. Her free and loving submission to her father is great preparation for her eventual submission to her husband.” Some young man will be awfully fortunate to get this young lady.

The idea seems to come from the Botkin family, Return of the Daughters

 

[Cat]

Hmmm…maybe it is not gender-specific and whoever does the author’s office sprays it around? The guy does seem to be in a foggy dream state when it comes to women!

No kidding. Let’s not forget the Your-House-Isn’t-Good-Enough Channel, speaking of the “domestic arts”, not to mention the dangers of listening uncritically to all the media-pushed fashions in parenting and family life!

I’m guessing that people who have the mindset of the blogger in the OP probably don’t have televisions or any other secular media in their homes.

I’ve seen this in some extreme separatist Evangelical Protestant homes. They don’t believe in secular media, so they don’t have televisions, radio (other than Protestant Christian stations that don’t play Christian rock music), newspapers, magazines (other than select Christian magazines), and very few books other than the classics. Not sure about computers–I converted to Catholicism around the time since the internet became so common in homes. Computers must be a tough one for some of these more extreme-believing families–it’s getting to the point where a computer is necessary to be involved with society.

 

[marymary1975]

I am so glad that both I and my mother had good college educations. I grew up in a home where I learned how to take care of a home, cook, clean, do yardwork, care for a farm and farm animals, and generally how to be a well-rounded individual with the ability to take care of all kinds of different things. MY BROTHERS LEARNED THE SAME THINGS. My mom is also a nurse, so we learned a lot about first aid and general medical terminology and basic medical care, which has come in handy so incredibly often in life. She taught us to be capable individuals, and her college education paired with her teaching about life skills have been invaluable to us. Going into college, so many of my friends had no clue how to do laundry, keep a dorm room actually clean, how to do basic cooking, how to organize… I was doing all of that by age 7! By the time I got to college I was more than prepared to be on my own.

Now that I’ve graduated and have decided to go back to school for a nursing degree, I am realizing just how valuable my education from my mother prepared me for completing college successfully and also for the real world. My husband was kind of sheltered growing up, so I was able to get him up to speed quickly for doing everything he needed to know how to do as far as running a household goes haha.

Funny, what you say makes me think about my mother in law who is also a registered nurse, has always been a working and has a large family. All her children have education passed bachelors’ degree, all her kids including her sons learned cooking, how to do laundry, housekeeping and all kinds of domestic skills. All her kids are practicing catholics, her daughters are happily married with practicing catholic men and have very stable households, and her two married sons who (my fiancee is the only one of her kids who is not married yet) are very involved dads, do their share of housework and they are also happily married (to women with professional degrees) with practicing catholic families and my fiancee is exactly the same way as his brothers.

Yep, what a horrible thing women with College education and working catholic moms can do to catholic families, don’t you think? (Obviously I am being sarcastic )

 

[fpt]

Hey, what do ya’ll think of this?

fixthefamily.com/blog/6-reasons-to-not-send-your-daughter-to-college

I would like to know their moral views, in doxa and in praxis, about:

The equality and the equity of dual humanity;
The modesty of garments of the baby girl, of the female teenager, of the single adult woman, of the bride, of the wife, of the wife and mother, of the wife, mother and grandmother: trousers, skirt, dress, underwear, bikini on beach, in the swimming pool, veil or hat at church, veil or hat during mass, veil or hat in the street;
The female sports, the female leisures, the female arts, the female sciences, the cultural activities of females;
The female rights, the female obligations and the female duties in function of the state life, in general;
The rights of the wife, the obligations of the wife and the duties of the wife, in the marriage;
The mutual, reciprocal, bilateral, equal and equitable submission, within the marriage, between wife and husband;
The articulations of ends of marriage: the primary anti-personalism, the personlism, the primary anti-morality of happiness, the only morality of the obligation, the theoritical providentialism of the procreation, the conjugal fideism of the procreation, the conjugal quietism of the procreation, the quiverfullism at the catholic sauce, the N.F.P., the responsible procreation;
The conjugal privileges of wife on her husband, in the marriage;
The fact that the family is not a seminary and is not a monastry;
The fact that the family is not a pre-seminary and is not a pre-monastry;
The fact that the wife is not a nun, a sister, a female sacred lay person;
The fact that the wife is not a baby, a child, a teenager, and is not in ontological inferiority toward her husband;

 

[on_the_hill]

From a practical standpoint, I will agree that many fewer women should be going to college. And I’ll add that many fewer men should be going to college.

Basically, too many people are going to college, and I’m not being facetious. 40, 50, 60 years ago, college was ‘the dream.’ It’s not anymore. A college education doesn’t guarantee worthwhile employment afterward. But that’s a whole 'nother ball of wax.

 

[Kamaduck]

From a practical standpoint, I will agree that many fewer women should be going to college. And I’ll add that many fewer men should be going to college.

Basically, too many people are going to college, and I’m not being facetious. 40, 50, 60 years ago, college was ‘the dream.’ It’s not anymore. A college education doesn’t guarantee worthwhile employment afterward. But that’s a whole 'nother ball of wax.

This is reasonable- it’s just that it isn’t a gendered issue.

 

[fpt]

Six reasons NOT to send your son to college;
Six reasons for not going to to college, for everyone;
Six reasons or more for living in an isolation bubble;

I know, I am and can be a little bit provocative!!!

 

[titoRoberto]

Wow what a great article.
Most catolic don’t make a link with working out woman and problem in society, because it affect family.

What about a man than can’t make enough $ to sustain a family? What should he do?

 

[fpt]

Does it mean that their daughters will not go to college, because they are females (female adult human being)? If yes, I hope not, that is very awful, is very sad, is very unfair, is very irresponsible, is non christian, is really discriminatory, in the noble sense, is immoral and thus that is not very catholic.

Their intellectual approaches seems poor, seems crazy, does not seem in link with the true catholicism, in the details and all the subtelties.

 

[fpt]

Does it mean that their daughters will not go to college, because they are females (female adult human being)? If yes, I hope not, that is very awful, is very sad, is very unfair, is very irresponsible, is non christian, is really discriminatory, in the noble sense, is immoral and thus that is not very catholic.

Their intellectual approaches **seem poor, seem crazy, do not seem **in link with the true catholicism, in the details and all the subtelties.

Be careful, on the web there are many moral false views concerning: the catholic doctrine and the catholic practices (doxa and praxis).

The strong reactionism and/or the simplism and the simplicism in the reaction are dangerous

 

[dixieagle]

They don’t have any official standing in my parish and their ideas aren’t really coherent enough to attract any of my attention. I’ve just ignored them. Considering most of their videos had only 20-100 views before Jezebel posted to their website so did everyone else. They’ve just attracted attention because the poorly written articles and cheap polyester suits fit into the stereotype atheists like to hold of conservative catholics.

You’re exactly right about why this has attracted attention.

I have no patience with those who attempt to put the “Catholic” stamp on such utter drivel, playing into the hands of those who are aggressively anti-Catholic.

Now, I must go and speak with my sweet, Catholic husband (the one I met freshman year in college in our Theology class…)

 

[fpt]

For information, in order to understand their own manner of seeing the female human nature.

Missy’s Happy Notes—Should He Correct Me?
fixthefamily.com/citabelles/missy-s-happy-notes-what-does-god-think

In the Garden of Eden, Satan tempted Eve. He went to her first. What if Adam would have been a man and corrected her and protected her from the snare of the devil? He would have felt like a man for doing so, even more so if she would have listened to him and did what he said. Don’t we all wish this would have happened!! Phew, what a mess! “No Eve, God said not to eat the fruit of this tree, but from all of the others here in this beautiful garden. Come away. We are going to listen to Him because He loves us and we love him. We are going to obey Him who created us.” Eve in turn, I think, would have fallen more deeply in love with him for doing this. To be corrected by a husband is not a demeaning thing. Because we obey God, it becomes a wonderful thing. Many blessings and graces flow from this exercise of obedience, of human nature. This is the way God designed it.

A playing out of this exercise is illustrated in Jane Austin’s Emma. The fallen human nature of a woman is displayed in Emma as she is a busybody in matchmaking and manipulation. She talks behind Mr. Knightly’s back, her pride surfaces, and she interferes in others’ lives. She causes chaos and she worries as she gets herself in trouble. Hearts break and tears fall. Her friend Mr. Knightly scolds and corrects her. At the end, when they reveal their love, he tells her that she has borne his rebukes better than any other woman in London would have borne it! He is so debonair. Isn’t it something that she has loved him all of that time and realizes it when she almost loses him because of her own fault. He saves her from herself, her faults and she loves it and him for it! Of course, she had a good attitude about it and understood what he was doing. This is an understanding of human nature.

There is something deeper than the correction which many seem like a childish thing. This correction of a woman by a man was always meant to be back in the Garden of Eden. Look what happened when Adam didn’t correct Eve. Did she love him as deeply as she should have, the way God intended after this? He let her and all of us down letting her have her own way. Then, back to the movie: Emma cried when Mr. Knightly rebuked her mouthy jokes and comments at a picnic. Then she cried when she thought she had lost him and when she had made a mess of things. So many times we are tempted to think like a human. Maybe some are tempted to think, “No man is going to tell me what to do or correct me!” Remember when Jesus rebuked Peter telling him that he was thinking like a man, not like God. He said, “Get behind me Satan!” I am glad that my husband is not scared of me. I am glad that he is man enough to make sure I keep my own spoon in my own pot! He protects me from myself, my fallen human tendencies as a female. Otherwise, it can get hurtful and kind of embarrassing! God bless you. Love, Missy

And to Adam he said: Because thou hast hearkened to the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldst not eat, cursed is the earth in thy work; with labour and toil shalt thou eat thereof all the days of thy life. Gen. 3:17

 

[LightBound]

Wow what a great article.
Most catolic don’t make a link with working out woman and problem in society, because it affect family.

What about a man than can’t make enough $ to sustain a family? What should he do?

“a great article”?

Oh, I see. forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=11192050#post11192050

Please realize that your wife having an education isn’t the reason she has an aversion to cleaning house. College or a career doesn’t “cause” a woman to dislike housekeeping. There are plenty of women who haven’t finished grammar school and don’t like cleaning their home.

 

[marymary1975]

For information, in order to understand their own manner of seeing the female human nature.

Missy’s Happy Notes—Should He Correct Me?
fixthefamily.com/citabelles/missy-s-happy-notes-what-does-god-think

In the Garden of Eden, Satan tempted Eve. He went to her first. What if Adam would have been a man and corrected her and protected her from the snare of the devil? He would have felt like a man for doing so, even more so if she would have listened to him and did what he said. Don’t we all wish this would have happened!! Phew, what a mess! “No Eve, God said not to eat the fruit of this tree, but from all of the others here in this beautiful garden. Come away. We are going to listen to Him because He loves us and we love him. We are going to obey Him who created us.” Eve in turn, I think, would have fallen more deeply in love with him for doing this. To be corrected by a husband is not a demeaning thing. Because we obey God, it becomes a wonderful thing. Many blessings and graces flow from this exercise of obedience, of human nature. This is the way God designed it.

A playing out of this exercise is illustrated in Jane Austin’s Emma. The fallen human nature of a woman is displayed in Emma as she is a busybody in matchmaking and manipulation. She talks behind Mr. Knightly’s back, her pride surfaces, and she interferes in others’ lives. She causes chaos and she worries as she gets herself in trouble. Hearts break and tears fall. Her friend Mr. Knightly scolds and corrects her. At the end, when they reveal their love, he tells her that she has borne his rebukes better than any other woman in London would have borne it! He is so debonair. Isn’t it something that she has loved him all of that time and realizes it when she almost loses him because of her own fault. He saves her from herself, her faults and she loves it and him for it! Of course, she had a good attitude about it and understood what he was doing. This is an understanding of human nature.

There is something deeper than the correction which many seem like a childish thing. This correction of a woman by a man was always meant to be back in the Garden of Eden. Look what happened when Adam didn’t correct Eve. Did she love him as deeply as she should have, the way God intended after this? He let her and all of us down letting her have her own way. Then, back to the movie: Emma cried when Mr. Knightly rebuked her mouthy jokes and comments at a picnic. Then she cried when she thought she had lost him and when she had made a mess of things. So many times we are tempted to think like a human. Maybe some are tempted to think, “No man is going to tell me what to do or correct me!” Remember when Jesus rebuked Peter telling him that he was thinking like a man, not like God. He said, “Get behind me Satan!” I am glad that my husband is not scared of me. I am glad that he is man enough to make sure I keep my own spoon in my own pot! He protects me from myself, my fallen human tendencies as a female. Otherwise, it can get hurtful and kind of embarrassing! God bless you. Love, Missy

And to Adam he said: Because thou hast hearkened to the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldst not eat, cursed is the earth in thy work; with labour and toil shalt thou eat thereof all the days of thy life. Gen. 3:17

This is quite a screwed up interpretation of the Adam and Eve story.

 

[fpt]

The " catholic chariarization " of some catholic lay persons is on the way. It is very sad, very awful and very dangerous. A new evangelization inside the Church would be very useful and helpful.

In the USA, the fundamentalist catholics are existing, it is very scary.

 

[Cider]

My answers to the list

1 She will attract the wrong types of men:

ok I see where they are coming from, but women are not slaves to who they attract. We are capable of saying no, and choosing not to date men that behave that way. Colleges also have young men that are working hard and have goals in life. It’s our job as parents to model good choices and to guide our daughters in choosing good men, before they ever become adults.

2 She will be in a near occasion of sin.

Their argument is mainly focused on dorm life of kids living away from home. There are ways to deal with their concern. Kids can go to a local college and live at home, but the best decision is picking the right school not just for their academics but also their culture.

1. She will not learn to be a wife and mother.

Shouldn’t that have already been modeled while the kids were growing up? Regardless, here is a link with a list of schools offering home economics degrees. Although I don’t see why a woman shouldn’t pursue whatever subject interests her for personal enrichment. English, History, Political Science, Art all enrich peoples lives and those that know them. At the very least she will a great resource for her children. educhoices.org/articles/Home_Economics_School_List_of_Schools_with_Home_Economics_Degree_Programs.html

1. The cost of a degree is becoming more difficult to recoup.

True. And the financial investment benefit ratio is something that needs to be decided by each family and the woman herself.

5 You don’t have to prove anything to the world.

true

6 It could be a near occasion of sin for the parents.

Yes parents shouldn’t use the excuse of it’s too expensive to pay for college as an excuse to avoid children. The answer to that isn’t that girls shouldn’t go to college but that each family will assist based on their own financial situation while at the same time following Church teaching.

7 She will regret it.

Love these blanket statement titles. Going to college does not mean that you have to buy into the two career family.

 

[LightBound]

Wow what a great article.
Most catolic don’t make a link with working out woman and problem in society, because it affect family.

What about a man than can’t make enough $ to sustain a family? What should he do?

As far as the man not making enough to sustain a family…I’m sure that the article’s author would fault the man for not making a good decision about his career and how if you followed “his” teachings and instructions, you should be wealthy and able to provide for a family of 20 if you just budget and live simply.

The Church teaches that a married couple are one flesh. They come together and stay together, in good times and in bad. In bad financial times, such as when a man cannot make enough money to sustain a family, the women should be able to assist by getting a paying job that will help the family. The Church has NO problem with that- women getting an education and working. What the concern from the Church is, based on encyclicals on the family, is when the priority of the wife working takes precedence over her role of wife and mother. If your wife is working so you can make your home payment, eat, and have the basic necessities of life, that’s not a problem. If your wife is working so you can “keep up with the Jones” or because she wants to constantly be away from the home and the children, that is a problem. Usually things like this have an underlying concern that needs to be addressed on an individual basis.

 

[EasterJoy]

It could be a near occasion of sin for the parents.

Yes parents shouldn’t use the excuse of it’s too expensive to pay for college as an excuse to avoid children. The answer to that isn’t that girls shouldn’t go to college but that each family will assist based on their own financial situation while at the same time following Church teaching…

I know many parents who tell their kids, “If you want to go to college, study hard so you can get some scholarships, because we can’t help you.” (or “this is all we can do to help you”…) That is the reality of families who “make too much but not enough”.