St. Monica pray for us! Praying for our husbands....

  • Thread starter Thread starter Lone_Catholic
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
I am offering prayers for all husbands, wives, sons, daughters and other family members and friends so that they find their way to the true path to God.
 
I’m praying for all of us! Everyday I pray the Chaplet of Divine Mercy for us all! I was saw struck by the readings of the book of Tobit, Tobias & Sarah were married despite of all their difficulties in life they prayed together for God’s grace and blessings on their marriage. It touched me and made me think of us all.
Peace and Blessings
 
I will continue to pray for the conversion of everyone`s spouse, and other family members

Sincerely,

Maria1212
 
Hi folks, sandraladeda here again. Well, I’ve been really strong, praying faithfully for hubby, he’s a cradle Catholic, but does not believe. I am part of a faith community in which, no surprise, there are many women who are way ahead of their husbands, faithwise, and praying for their men. Recently, there was an event offered for men only to participate in. We all prayed for our hubbies to participate, and praise God, many did so. My hubby was not one of them. I was very happy for my friends whose hubbies did participate, and I prayed and prayed for their experience of this retreat weekend. I felt consoled that, even though my man did not go, I was happy for those that went, and prayed like mad for them.

I recently was shown photos taken at this event, and saw men there that I didn’t realize had participated. I don’t know why it hit me so hard, I knew seeing the photos would make me a bit wistful for my own husband to make some movement in his faith life. The husband of an aquaintance of mine was there, and for some reason, I was just struck by how easy it was for him to go - he was invited, he said yes. He just went! I feel terrible for feeling terrible about it. I am glad the man went - he is a great guy, nice dad and husband. If I had talked with him, I would have encouraged him to go. I would have prayed for him. But on another level, I feel like - sheesh! I have been praying for my husband for 5 years, I prayed my guts out that he would go on this retreat, but he said no, and I accepted that, as I had prayed so much, I knew that was all I could do. I threw myself into praying for all the other husbands. Did this other man’s wife pray he would go? Is she throwing herself on her knees daily, praying for his conversion? Saying the rosary for him daily? No! He just went!

I know life is not fair, and God works in mysterious ways, and we do not always get to understand His plan. But I just feel so discouraged - my husband has not moved one inch in his faith in 5 years, not one inch. I, on the other hand, have moved miles and miles in my faith. It is so bittersweet - Christ is my life, yet I feel like an alien with my husband. I am sure God would not bless me with a huge faith, yet cause it to stress my marriage. But I do not see what is gained, for my family, for me, for my husband, for God’s kingdom, to have my husband stubbornly standing outside of faith.

I accept God’s will, I trust Him, I admit I could be more patient. But I am finding it very hard today, to pray confidently and with expectation, as I bare myself to all the grief and sadness as these prayers continue to go unanswered.

I would love for someone to offer some sort of inspiration for my discouragement, and not just “St. Monica prayed forever for her husband and son and her prayers were answered” - it has not been forever for me, but it has been forever in terms of how long since I came to faith. I dust myself off daily, and start fresh, praying for my husband. I am sure I will do so again tommorow, and the day after. But today, I feel like I am shouting into an empty well…
 
I am reading The Secret Diary of Elisabeth LeSeur. Her husband never did receive Christ in her lifetime, but became a priest after her death. It may or may not be that way for the ones we love…loving God, not becoming priests or religious. My situation causes me pain, but I keep trying to trust Jesus and remember he loves them even more than I do. I do recommend the book. I am reading it by fits and starts, spreading it out for my own encouragement.
 
Sandra,
My faith lay dormant for 17 years. I don’t know that I could tell you my wife was frustrated about that or not. She never said much except “you need to do” this or that. Maybe she was talking to God but talking AT me. I woke up finally. She suggested I read a book. I think. Can’t recall, actually. It was there and I developed an interest in it. I’ve taken off from there. Maybe you need to find out what might interest him. My impression is some older Catholic men were tired of having faith beat into them. It might take some digging. I suspect he has a different agenda (don’t most men?) and you just need to figure out what he might be interested in. You may need to build a bridge he can walk across. Faith and Deeds. Prayer and work.

I’ve suggested this to others before. Be close to your husband. From there you can pull or push, but if you are far away, you have no leverage.
 
newbetx said:
Sandra,
My faith lay dormant for 17 years. I don’t know that I could tell you my wife was frustrated about that or not. She never said much except “you need to do” this or that. Maybe she was talking to God but talking AT me. I woke up finally. She suggested I read a book. I think. Can’t recall, actually. It was there and I developed an interest in it. I’ve taken off from there. Maybe you need to find out what might interest him. My impression is some older Catholic men were tired of having faith beat into them. It might take some digging. I suspect he has a different agenda (don’t most men?) and you just need to figure out what he might be interested in. You may need to build a bridge he can walk across. Faith and Deeds. Prayer and work.

I’ve suggested this to others before. Be close to your husband. From there you can pull or push, but if you are far away, you have no leverage.
Click to expand...
Thank you for a male perspective. It is helpful. I never tell my husband what he needs to do, should do, I stay very silent about the matter of faith for long stretches, in the hopes that living my example will eventually draw him in to see what is bringing me such joy, and peace, and patience. I have been relatively quiet, as my husband is one who takes even a gentle nudge and feels it like a brick to the head. I try to keep so much of my faith practice “under the radar” so to speak, so he never feels affected by it, or left out, or pushed to join me, or whatever. My prayer group is during the day, so I am never missing family time in the evening. I attend morning mass, and he problably isn’t even aware of how often I go to mass. If he comes to bed as I say my evening prayers, I drop what I am doing to give him my attention and finish the prayers later. I try to greet him every day with love and affection and positive attention.

There are definitely books galore in our home, as I read a ton, but he has a big wall up where religion is concerned. If he does read something, he zeroes in on one point in a negative fashion. As an example, I had some literature about the rosary on the counter one day, and he read some of the messages received from Mary regarding the rosary - I think one point was about saying the rosary and getting to heaven. My husband read it disdainfully, looked at me with a look of incredulity on his face and said “I guess I am not going to heaven cuz I don’t pray the rosary?” then walked away… When I talked to the kids about Lent, he asked "why do I have to give anything up for Lent?’ and I said “Glad you asked that question, there is a good article in the faith section of the newspaper today about Lent” and I read it out loud. He just snorted and shook his head at concepts like “sacrifice”. It makes it most challenging to teach our children when he undermines my efforts.
Have a blessed day, all! 🙂
 
Sandra… hmmm a tough nut, eh? Sorry. I’ll have to think some more… I would sense that he feels ready to do battle with a more direct approach… Stopping your prayers for him must let him know how much you appreciate him. Ever ask him to join you?
 
newbetx said:
Sandra… hmmm a tough nut, eh? Sorry. I’ll have to think some more… I would sense that he feels ready to do battle with a more direct approach… Stopping your prayers for him must let him know how much you appreciate him. Ever ask him to join you?
Click to expand...
No way!! I say prayers at night with my 10 year old son (he becomes very pius at bedtime, lol) and when he is in bed and yelling for me to come say prayers with him, I have encouraged hubby to go instead, but he has never said yes. He would never pray with me. When we say grace at the supper table, I have added a chalk board on the kitchen wall which says “We pray for…” and family members can add their intentions. This is my sneaky way of adding some family prayer time. For some reason, hubby goes along with saying grace. However, he cracks jokes and is totally irrevererent, or grabs the chalk, and adds goofy things, like prayers for his sports team, or some other ridiculous intention.

He comes to mass about once a month, but sits there and rubs his face and acts impatient, like it’s a big enough sacrifice just to be in the building, he is determined NOT to get anything out of the mass. He goofs off with the boys…great…

I would guess it’s been about 35 years since his last confession…he does not ‘buy into’ confession at all. Recently, our 15 year old daughter had an interesting week in which she fessed up to some wrongdoing, to me (we are very close, share our faith a lot) and she really wanted to go to confession, and I took her with me. I told hubby about this result to the week of discussions of her wrongdoing, and he seemed to think it was a good thing, FOR HER. However, I have encouraged him to return to confession, and he just cannot see why he should tell anything to a priest.

He was born and raised Catholic in a very Catholic family. It’s not like there was no formation in his life.

I feel very lonely downplaying this very integral part of my life - my faith. Like I have something to be ashamed of??? :confused:

Thanks, newbetx - yes, tough nut to crack!! :banghead:
 
sandraladeda, are you sure we’re not married to the same man? Or maybe your husband is my husband’s identical twin, and they were seperated at birth…humm…😉
 
mommyof4 said:
sandraladeda, are you sure we’re not married to the same man? Or maybe your husband is my husband’s identical twin, and they were seperated at birth…humm…😉
Click to expand...
Well, I see your location is “hiding from the housework”, maybe you and I are long lost twins? 'cuz I am also hiding from the housework…

Are you also “drop dead gorgeous”? 'cuz if you are, that’s just spooky!!! 😉 :rolleyes: 😃
 
Thoughts and prayers for all here. 👍

Keep my husband in yours as well! 😃
 
sandraladeda said:
Well, I see your location is “hiding from the housework”, maybe you and I are long lost twins? 'cuz I am also hiding from the housework…

Are you also “drop dead gorgeous”? 'cuz if you are, that’s just spooky!!! 😉 :rolleyes: 😃
Click to expand...
Well…people have told me to “drop dead,” but they have never put the word “gorgeous” in that statement!😃
 
katy said:
I am reading The Secret Diary of Elisabeth LeSeur. Her husband never did receive Christ in her lifetime, but became a priest after her death. It may or may not be that way for the ones we love…loving God, not becoming priests or religious. My situation causes me pain, but I keep trying to trust Jesus and remember he loves them even more than I do. I do recommend the book. I am reading it by fits and starts, spreading it out for my own encouragement.
Click to expand...
Hi everyone, I posted on this thread many months ago, haven’t looked at it for a while, but just wanted to say to you Katy, that I am also reading this book. It is good so far and I am asking Elisabeth to intercede for me with my marriage. My husband does believe in God, does go to mass but thats as far as it goes.
Anyway, hello to everyone. I haven’t read the posts but will remember you all in my prayers.
God bless
 
A beautiful thread and one that has been close to my heart for years. My husband and I were confirmed together into the Catholic faith shortly after our Lutheran wedding (I was Lutheran at the time and my dh was not baptised.) He chose the Catholic church as the faith in which he wanted to be baptised, being rather anti-Catholic at the time I did my best to talk him out of it, Lutheran was so much easier! 🤷 I did however wish to join him for the classes, just to learn mind you 🙂 Needless to say, the Lord worked wonders in my heart and we stood together that Easter Vigil and professed our vows as members of the Catholic faith.

Due to some different issues he strayed rather quickly from the faith. He continued to join me at mass, as long as it was only on Sunday morning, and supported my faith journey each step of the way.

I began paying the rosary for his conversion and vowed to do so until his heart was warmed back to the faith. I’m still praying :o

Bit by bit the Lord has given me glimses of his conversion… suddenly he throws away all his porn in the house (AMEN!!), he starts watching his language a bit closer, so on and so forth one time I even caught him kneeling in prayer before mass! Oh how my heart soared that day.

Right now he is working halfways across the country, an opportunity that we BOTH agree was provided by our Lord’s guidiance. His last visit home, after 5 weeks of being away from me and our 1 year old daughter, he told me a story. He mentioned the rosary that is in my car that he has in Washington and that he should bring it back to me. Odd, I thought; then he continued. “I tried to pray it a couple of times, I don’t know all the prayers but I did the best I could”. Honestly, this brought tears to my eyes and still does. When he left I slipped a note and a rosary prayer card into his suitcase thinking he wouldn’t find it until he arrived back at the job site. He found it before even leaving the house. I feared he would scoff (a fear based upon my own insecurities, not on anything he’s ever said or done.) On the contrary, he thanked me and ask for instruction!

We have a ways to go but oh how far we have come, we’ve been married for 5 years now.

Sorry for the lengthy dialogue but I hope if offers hope. My mother (who’s a deacon in the Lutheran church 🙂 ) once reminded me that I cannot see in his heart, just because someone may not show physical signs of something does not mean that they are far removed from it.

Seekngrace.
 
I read today’s gospel (Luke 15:3-7) and felt hopeful that of the 100 sheep, my husband is the lost one he leaves the 99 others to go find, comes home, and says to his friends and neighbors “rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost”…

Praying for all the wayward sheep in our families…:gopray2:
 
sandraladeda said:
I read today’s gospel (Luke 15:3-7) and felt hopeful that of the 100 sheep, my husband is the lost one he leaves the 99 others to go find, comes home, and says to his friends and neighbors “rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep that was lost”…

Praying for all the wayward sheep in our families…:gopray2:
Click to expand...
I was thinking the same thing today, too.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top