St. Monica pray for us! Praying for our husbands....

[Diana_Lynn]

Novena to Saint Joseph for all sick husbands to find help.

Day 3

O glorious St. Joseph,
friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
thou whose power renders impossible things possible,
come to our aid in our present trouble and distress.
Take these important and difficult affairs
which we recommend to your protection,
that they may end happily.

O dear St. Joseph,
all our confidence is in you.
Let it not be said that we have invoked you in vain,
and since you are so powerful with Jesus and Mary,
show that your goodness equals power.

Amen.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

**PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for:

the conversion of my husband and the strong faith of my children, the conversion of all sinners in my family and of the spouses being prayed for here by CAF members,

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

Lord, I commend all husbands and wives
represented in this thread to you this day,
That you would raise us up to be men and women after your own heart.
That you would cause us to grow in wisdom and in knowledge of you
and that these husbands become holy and spiritual heads of these homes,
and that these wives become and remain vessels that shine your light continuously.
Keep us all obedient to your will and humble in mind and action.
Amen.**

 

[BeeSweet]

Novena to Saint Joseph for all sick husbands to find help.

Day 5

O glorious St. Joseph,
friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
thou whose power renders impossible things possible,
come to our aid in our present trouble and distress.
Take these important and difficult affairs
which we recommend to your protection,
that they may end happily.

O dear St. Joseph,
all our confidence is in you.
Let it not be said that we have invoked you in vain,
and since you are so powerful with Jesus and Mary,
show that your goodness equals power.

Amen.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

 

[BeeSweet]

**PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

the conversion of my husband, healing and salvation of our marriage, and the strong faith of our son, the conversion of all sinners in our families and of the spouses being prayed for here by CAF members,**

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.

Amen.

Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death.
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death.

Jesus, I trust in You!
Jesus, I trust in You!
Jesus, I trust in You!

 

[BeeSweet]

Ladies, I have to be out of town for the next four days. I’ve printed out the two novenas to take with me. It will be difficult to find a private moment to pray during these next days, but I will try my best to do so. I am praying for you all, and for your husbands and families. Thank you all for your prayers.

 

[brandymmiller]

This is so true…I just have to reach past the pride because as gently as i can show him the way, or teach him, he is imbarrassed thinking he is doing a womans job and is mortified. This fixation with this point clouds his ability to see the other trying to help him.

I pray too, that he does not give up.

Lana

Lana -

I would be very, VERY careful not to encourage your girls to speak that way to their father. Explain to them that daddy may do things a little differently, but different isn’t wrong. You should also be sure to leave him instructions when it is his turn to take over, but tell him that you are confident he can handle things. Make sure to praise his masculinity - how strong he is to be so gentle, etc. - and to encourage him when he gets discouraged.

My husband was forced to be a stay-at-home parent for a time when my son was growing up. It took time for him to understand that love and care are the foundations for discipline that works. Children only listen if they know you love first.

 

[Belle10]

Ladies, I have to be out of town for the next four days. I’ve printed out the two novenas to take with me. It will be difficult to find a private moment to pray during these next days, but I will try my best to do so. I am praying for you all, and for your husbands and families. Thank you all for your prayers.

Prayers for safe travels! (and some quiet time to pray)

 

[Belle10]

Novena day 4:

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for:

the conversion of my husband, the strong Catholic faith of our daughter,
the perpetual sobriety of my father and the renewal of my parents’ marriage,
and for all the marriages and families represented in this thread

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.
Amen.

Lord, I commend all husbands and wives
represented in this thread to you this day,
That you would raise us up to be men and
women after your own heart.
That you would cause us to grow in wisdom and
in knowledge of you and that these husbands
become holy and spiritual heads of these homes,
and that these wives become and remain vessels
that shine your light continuously.
Keep us all obedient to your will and humble
in mind and action.
Amen.

 

[jules11]

Hi everyone!
This is a very busy thread, hard to keep up with it!
I have been praying for you all every day.
My life is so complicated. My husband is talking about solicitors and property settlement. He told me he contacted the Catholic Diocesan centre today, although I can’t imagine what for.
If he wants an annulment, he needs to get a divorce first. I am coming to terms with my tiny, incy bit of hope that I had left, that he would get help and fix things. I find it so hard to let go of that. He still says it was all my fault. I just cant understand how someone can not see themselves at all or where they are fault in things. It is mind boggling. It just keeps going round and round in my head, 'why, why, WHY can’t he see what he does and has done wrong?
I just dont get it. But I have to stop driving myself crazy trying to figure that out.
Anyway, I am feeling God’s strength every step of the way. He is SO good. No matter how hard this is, how much it hurts, I feel that it is not wasted. There is a purpose. I just hope it will get him to heaven.
God bless you all and hope you are all happy and well.

 

[mom4truth]

Jules:

Boy, do I know what you are talking about! I think that our husbands are so in the dark because they have a lot of pride and don’t want to be in the “Light” at the moment. The only way they will come out of the darkness, is when they are ready to let the Holy Spirit take them out of it! This is what I pray for my husband - that the Holy Spirit will bring dh out of his darkness and into God’s mercy, forgiveness and Light. I am praying for you daily. Keep strong - I can tell you are! God bless!

 

[Belle10]

Anyway, I am feeling God’s strength every step of the way. He is SO good. No matter how hard this is, how much it hurts, I feel that it is not wasted. There is a purpose. I just hope it will get him to heaven.

Jules (and M4T, you snuck in there! ), sorry things are so crazy for you right now. You have an incredible attitude though, one that I’m sure you will be rewarded for one day!

I keep this scripture on my desk, and thought it might be a good time to share it:

Patient endurance is what you need now,
so that you will continue to do God’s will.
Then you will receive all that he has promised.
~Hebrews 10:36

 

[jules11]

Jules:

Boy, do I know what you are talking about! I think that our husbands are so in the dark because they have a lot of pride and don’t want to be in the “Light” at the moment. The only way they will come out of the darkness, is when they are ready to let the Holy Spirit take them out of it! This is what I pray for my husband - that the Holy Spirit will bring dh out of his darkness and into God’s mercy, forgiveness and Light. I am praying for you daily. Keep strong - I can tell you are! God bless!

Mom, you are right. But what I don’t get is that, the first step to healing is admitting you are wrong/ a sinner etc. None of us are perfect but how can we be helped when we can’t admit we do anything wrong?
God loves a humble heart.
If this marriage was in my power to fix, I’d still be in it. It is NOT in my hands. But he keeps saying it was. Huh?
Was I supposed to just take the abuse? How can he think I should? How can he think he is innocent when I have been verbally, emotionally abused and threatened?
I really don’t understand!

 

[jules11]

Jules (and M4T, you snuck in there! ), sorry things are so crazy for you right now. You have an incredible attitude though, one that I’m sure you will be rewarded for one day!

I keep this scripture on my desk, and thought it might be a good time to share it:

Patient endurance is what you need now,
so that you will continue to do God’s will.
Then you will receive all that he has promised.
~Hebrews 10:36

Thank you Belle!
Has been a hard day today. On the phone to lawyers etc… I just hate that what was love, (on my part anyway) will be reduced to bickering in a court room.
It is unbelievable!

 

[jules11]

Jules (and M4T, you snuck in there! ), sorry things are so crazy for you right now. You have an incredible attitude though, one that I’m sure you will be rewarded for one day!

I keep this scripture on my desk, and thought it might be a good time to share it:

Patient endurance is what you need now,
so that you will continue to do God’s will.
Then you will receive all that he has promised.
~Hebrews 10:36

Thank you Belle!
Has been a hard day today. On the phone to lawyers etc… I just hate that what was love, (on my part anyway) will be reduced to bickering in a court room.
It is unbelievable!

 

[mom4truth]

Jules:

You’re right about your dh being wrong and needing to admit it and humble himself. But if he won’t, there’s not much you can do. That’s why I pray that the Holy Spirit will show our dh’s their failings. If I point out to my dh something wrong - all hell breaks loose! That’s no exaggeration either! If your dh is abusive, then that’s bad. You don’t deserve to be treated that way, and I don’t believe God would want you to be treated that way either. You are precious to Him. Well, hang in there and I’ll keep praying. Much love,

 

[Rammy]

Lana -

I would be very, VERY careful not to encourage your girls to speak that way to their father. Explain to them that daddy may do things a little differently, but different isn’t wrong. You should also be sure to leave him instructions when it is his turn to take over, but tell him that you are confident he can handle things. Make sure to praise his masculinity - how strong he is to be so gentle, etc. - and to encourage him when he gets discouraged.

My husband was forced to be a stay-at-home parent for a time when my son was growing up. It took time for him to understand that love and care are the foundations for discipline that works. Children only listen if they know you love first.

Oh i do not encourage it. However, there are times like this he needs to see their perspective. He sees very little of them, and when he does, he wishes us all away and we are a burdon and a bother to him. He is clear in letting us know this too.

He finds even answering a math question for homework beneath him, frustrates him, and thinks i am not doing my job. He is very role oriented being from a european dutch farming background. I am not IN the field so to speak, and have been rendered useless. He values me very little, and is completely out of controle angry over my expectations of a world where man and women are equal in their own right. He prefers if i earn my keep, no matter the cost to the girls, or their upbringing.

He also has completely abused his say over the girls because he can get as mean as to tell them things so out of place, like “of course Shawntal is dumb, look at her mother!” but say it to her older sister of 1.5 years. Then this daughter is angry her father has said such mean things about her mother and sister. The other daughter, well in earshot hears this, and is devistated…“even Daddy thinks i am dumb!”

Who has to pick up the pieces…me. I have to repair the self esteme, the anger and the reality that daddy is an alcoholic and refuses to believe this happened, and thinks i am lieing over what he said. Their words are finally heard because i told him, i would allow them to say how they feel without punnishment for a month so HE can deal with what their point of view is.

He believes them, and apologises…yet he does not believe me!

This is a deep deep anger he has for me not working, and he does not care who it hurts…even his own kids. This is why i refuse to allow drinking in the home…he’s nasty. But this does not remove his anger.

Wright Wrong, and a time to be told the truth is a thin line here.
I do not know how else to tell him the kids are scared of you, don’t want to be left with you etc, and he thinks i make it up. So he has started asking them, and i told them to be honest and not to fear daddy…he just wants to know.

Something tells me it comming from their little face is working. Too bad i did not have that influence over him, that my word meant something. But i am a mere woman, they do, they do not speak or have oppinions, except what kind of laundry detergent she uses.

Don’t get me wrong…He is not a male shovenist pig. He is simply in full belief that this is what a man does, and this is what a woman does…never cross these lines.

It does not take long for him to not be able to handle it, because i do not answer to him, a mere man…lol No actually, i answer to myself with much contemplation over what God would do, or my own dad would do. Then i do it, and this erks him i went to God over him.

I can not fix this, except to ensure that if this keeps up, with no compromise, there will be nothing left to compromise. Tired of him wanting it differently, but will notdo anything but wait for it to be delivered onto his lap.

Been praying over this fellea a long time, been patient, been the misunderstood wife, been the good semaritan, been the scape goat…never been his wife…it seems i am not worthy of the role.

Lana

 

[Rammy]

Hi everyone!
This is a very busy thread, hard to keep up with it!
I have been praying for you all every day.
My life is so complicated. My husband is talking about solicitors and property settlement. He told me he contacted the Catholic Diocesan centre today, although I can’t imagine what for.
If he wants an annulment, he needs to get a divorce first. I am coming to terms with my tiny, incy bit of hope that I had left, that he would get help and fix things. I find it so hard to let go of that. He still says it was all my fault. I just cant understand how someone can not see themselves at all or where they are fault in things. It is mind boggling. It just keeps going round and round in my head, 'why, why, WHY can’t he see what he does and has done wrong?
I just dont get it. But I have to stop driving myself crazy trying to figure that out.
Anyway, I am feeling God’s strength every step of the way. He is SO good. No matter how hard this is, how much it hurts, I feel that it is not wasted. There is a purpose. I just hope it will get him to heaven.
God bless you all and hope you are all happy and well.

It starts with the want to fix things, and the realization of it being a life without blame, without defenses, and a desire to not need to be right.

I see this, my husband does not…but it is edging at least in a smaller lean towards this.

I gave up being right, trying to fix him or us. I simply worked on fixing me, my self esteme, and confidence in self relieves a lot of pressure off of a man because when you are upset, they do not know how to fix it, or make it stop. They are not as emotionally constructed as we are. They deal with facts

Deal the facts, and walk away…leave the flowery part out where we restate it over and over again, and talk about the dog next door and so on. I need you to not walk away when we speak together please, it is not helping us solve problems.

Then leave it up to him if he comes back.

So hard to do, as i could write a book verbally on the next 6 steps i need him to understand, what it connects to, how it reflects how i feel and so on…he’s like, just tell me what you want me to do…cut the lawn, ok…now can i go?

lol

But so true

I still am truing hard to do this, and yes a bit of pressure is off, but i am never quite ready in my head with where we are at. I do feel better about getting controle of my own life though.

Lana

God bless, and you indeed are in my prayers.

 

[Rammy]

Mom, you are right. But what I don’t get is that, the first step to healing is admitting you are wrong/ a sinner etc. None of us are perfect but how can we be helped when we can’t admit we do anything wrong?
God loves a humble heart.
If this marriage was in my power to fix, I’d still be in it. It is NOT in my hands. But he keeps saying it was. Huh?
Was I supposed to just take the abuse? How can he think I should? How can he think he is innocent when I have been verbally, emotionally abused and threatened?
I really don’t understand!

Oh you have reasons for resentment, for it all, but the thing is, he can only do this to us if we mirror how we feel about ourselves. If we feel ****** about ourselves, we allow what we feel we deserve…even if we don’t like it happening, and can see we should not be.

Self esteme lowered for what ever reason is the steering wheel to your ship. If you feel you are worthy of not being treated this way, it will not happen. This takes standing up for yourself. Not easy at all.

Do this hun, imagine the last place and time you truly felt safe and without fear of the world. I was about 10-11 and i remember how wide open my thoughts were for the world, how much God was in it, and how wonderful i believed the world was. I was totally innocent, i had hope and courage.

Now, to see this “little” inside of me, myself at age 11 lets say. I see her, love her and see her as a seperate part of me. I actually see her as a part of me who was put on a shelf, and forgotten, but mostly protected because her way of life is happy, and safe.

My life got put on hold, one thing at a time, and when i hurt, it is from the bases of the little 11 year old girls hurt. Not wanting to come out for fear someone will hurt me again if i trust them, and it is way to vulnerable.

Do this, think about her, get intouch with her, the “little” inside of you. Think of her as a litte girl you are babysitting. Now, when a verbal assault comes your way, and you are hit, this is what you should think of. Would you allow this little one to be spoken to like that, would you allow this? I bet with all that’s holy, that all of a sudden, in this littles defence, you would find the right words to say.

You would see the demeaningness, the need to stand up from the foul words, and see exactly how not doing so is you allowing your little to be hurt. Your little is your truest heart. That is the child that Jesus sees. Let the little go to God and seek comfort. That means your deepest desires over how badly this hurts.

This took me a year to get good at this, and no it is not fast, but you will see, the little IS you. and when you stand up for your little, you are becomming stronger, more self reliant, and feel better about yourself. You then stop enabeling others as much. I am better except face to face. But the knowing comes, you believe in yourself more, and the desperation goes away.

Life, the world, and God does not want your little hurting. Protect your little and use this one formula. Responsability means the ABILITY to RESPOND. If the adult is ABLE to RESPOND and simply does not for what ever reason, then you are enabeling the behaviour. There by allowing yourself to be used.

If the person is not ABLE to respond, like a hurt leg, and wants something passed to them…then help. If they want a drive to the beer store so they can not do and then verbally hurt you…then driving them is enabeling their behaviour.

So, wanting him to change how he feels is not as important as learning to allow your little the freedom to live in her own spot. To reject the little, is to reject you. Do you want to live with someone who rejects you? If he loves you, he will adore your little, your beliefs, and life will become smoother.

Just my last years advice from God, and the help of two friends willing to help me to stand up for my little.

Man it was hard to see my worthyness…but it feels so much better. I can love more deeply, not out of need, but want, and desire. I also found i had very similar problems with friends, in how i felt used.

So pray for your little…like me, she was in a box, way up on a shelf…kept safe…for someday (Lanasshoebox…a name i used here once)

Lana

 

[mnmom]

Just wanted to let you know that my niece’s little boy Evan is doing better. He is talking and recognises mommy and daddy and his grandparents. He is still not walking yet but will come in time. Thank you all for your prayers.

 

[katy]

Just wanted to let you know that my niece’s little boy Evan is doing better. He is talking and recognises mommy and daddy and his grandparents. He is still not walking yet but will come in time. Thank you all for your prayers.

Thank God!!! :bowdown2:

 

[BeeSweet]

Novena to Saint Joseph for all sick husbands to find help.

Day 6

O glorious St. Joseph,
friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
thou whose power renders impossible things possible,
come to our aid in our present trouble and distress.
Take these important and difficult affairs
which we recommend to your protection,
that they may end happily.

O dear St. Joseph,
all our confidence is in you.
Let it not be said that we have invoked you in vain,
and since you are so powerful with Jesus and Mary,
show that your goodness equals power.

Amen.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.

St. Joseph, friend of the Sacred Heart of Jesus,
pray for us and for all who invoke your aid.