I agree with what you’re saying. The transgender issue is a tough topic. Relationship does not always imply sex. As a matter of fact, two men can be in a romantic relationship, yet be celibate and not sinful. Same can be said for someone with a transgender spouse.
Pope Benedict talked of an ecology of man. Not saying that trans didn’t exist but that God made us this way for a reason and we should be knowing of that. Who knows. Maybe God made people have homosexual attraction or wish they were the other gender so that they could not fit into normal society, and instead become some of the most religious in society (many find God through suffering). I was talking with another person who deals with gender dysphoria and they consider it a cross to bear, as Christ himself talks about, and anticipates not having to deal with it in Heaven. As do I.
So, there’s a traditional, conservative way of looking at it. There’s also another way. That’s the way of at least accepting that it’s real, and that their struggles are real, and I believe even if you recognize it’s not God’s plan, it’s still part of the plan. It’s not like it’s fake or something that can be grown out of. At least not for most people that deal with it. I still deal with it. So, when we approach the transgender issue, just as the homosexual issue, we must be sure that we are understanding, and accepting. We must accept that the tendencies exist. I believe the Catechumen even says this. What we do about it is the question.
What I can be most certain of is the way that we deal with the issue, like I’ve been saying. I’m not certain of the answer to the problem, but how we deal with it, which is in the Catholic way, love and understanding. We must, must act on Christ’s most emphasized commandment, to treat others how we would like to be treated. With respect, and even love.