Vatican announces desire for more restrained sign of peace at Mass

[Miserissima]

During the sign of peace, should a person leave his pew, walk across the aisle, and shake hands with people in some of the pews opposite him?​

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=900165

 

[LongingSoul]

During the sign of peace, should a person leave his pew, walk across the aisle, and shake hands with people in some of the pews opposite him?​

CyrilSebastian, the original article addressed that point…

“The congregation for worship also noted that there are several abuses of the rite which are to be stopped: …the introduction of a “song of peace,” which does not exist in the Roman rite; …the faithful moving from their place to exchange the sign; …the priest leaving the altar to exchange the sign with the faithful; … and when, at occasions such as weddings or funerals, it becomes an occasion for congratulations or condolences.”

So doing that is technically an abuse of the rite.

 

[Teelynn]

Good. I really, really, really, really, really, really look forward to seeing this implemented.

(No, I am not holding my breath)

Agree completely. Part of our problem in the Church has always been trying to get the Bishops to comply with Rome. Sometimes, they don’t seem to pay any attention to directives. I am really looking forward (if it happens) to people not running all over Church during Mass to hug, kiss, talk etc. I LONG FOR THE DAY, that Mass is all about Jesus and not so much about US.

 

[Memaw]

Ah no, Christ would not be “crying.” People are merely sharing their concerns about how the Mass is conducted and about personal boundaries. No one has the right to grab and yank other’s hands and arms. Or to walk all over the nave greeting people like they were at a picnic during Mass. The liturgies of the Church are to be conducted with due reverence and respect in a communal setting. No one has a license to do whatever they want. No ones rights are being violated nor has anyone shown a lack of charity merely by discussing what is and isn’t proper for the Mass. It’s why we have the GIRM and other guidelines for such things from the Vatican.

AMEN and Thank you for stating it so clearly. We like to think God has to put up with any ole thing we decide we want to do. God has Laws we must follow and HE gave the Church the Authority to bind and loose laws for the good of the people. The sign of Peace was started as as a holy gesture, and it has been turned into an abuse of its meaning. We should work with the Church to correct this. God Bless, Memaw

 

[JackyB]

Agree completely. Part of our problem in the Church has always been trying to get the Bishops to comply with Rome. Sometimes, they don’t seem to pay any attention to directives. I am really looking forward (if it happens) to people not running all over Church during Mass to hug, kiss, talk etc. I LONG FOR THE DAY, that Mass is all about Jesus and not so much about US.

Couldn’t agree more, it’s unfortunate the Vatican did not order the end of the sign of the peace at Mass, that’s the day I long for.

 

[Sonny89]

Peace and All Good!!

At the time I went to school, it was tough to.tell the difference!!!.

It also sounds a lot like one of the Monks that taught me in school, too. My dad met him once & said he reminded him strongly of his former Drill Instructor in the USMC

 

[Memaw]

At my parish, during the sign of peace, people who know one another hug and kiss within their own group. The rest of us offer brief handshakes or nods, depending upon the distance between us.

I really think that hugging and kissing can be done among family members at any time. So I find it odd that they carry on with one another while ignoring their fellow worshipers.

My parish also hold hands during the Our Father. I really dislike that practice. It makes me nervous and I can’t concentrate on the prayer. All I’m thinking of is how quickly I can drop the hand of the stranger near me. I don’t think of fellow parishioners as being beneath me. I just don’t want to hold hands.

Holding hands during the Our Father is NOT part of the Mass. It takes our attention away from the prayer we are saying and puts it on who we are holding hands with. I don’t! I want to concentrate on the Our Father! God Bless, Memaw

 

[Della]

Agreed, I want an ordered, deeply reverential Mass. And I have left parishes where I thought Mass was too chaotic and touchy/feely (the passion presented as an interpretive dance).

It’s like the crying baby. I see people turning and glaring at the parents who are just dying of embarrassment and stress already. (I want them to remove the kid too, but I don’t glare at them.) It’s a lack of basic human fellow feeling. I am the last person to dispense with decorum. At my parish we don’t hold hands during the Lord’s Prayer. I am fine with that. If we held hands, I would be fine with that. Bottom line is I would just never express myself with this kind of negative commentary about interacting with my fellow parishioners. In my opinion, it’s trivial and sanctimonious.

This is a dicsussion forum. People are free to express their opinons here. Discussion regarding proper behavior at Mass is not trivial because the Mass is not trivial. I read nothing “sanctimonious” from anyone. If reading this thread disturbs your peace, then…

 

[aTraditionalist]

Teelynn:

Part of our problem in the Church has always been trying to get the Bishops to comply with Rome. Sometimes, they don’t seem to pay any attention to directives. I am really looking forward (if it happens) to people not running all over Church during Mass to hug, kiss, talk etc. I LONG FOR THE DAY, that Mass is all about Jesus and not so much about US.

This is the root of the division between the OF and EF from a traditionalist perspective. The sign of peace seems man-centric to me. Rome could bring the bishops inline but that would require words like anathema and excommunication. They have the means but seemingly not the will.

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[Corki]

At my parish, during the sign of peace, people who know one another hug and kiss within their own group. The rest of us offer brief handshakes or nods, depending upon the distance between us.

I really think that hugging and kissing can be done among family members at any time. So I find it odd that they carry on with one another while ignoring their fellow worshipers.

You point out an area where I think the Church local could be more consistent. I have heard priests say that you should not share the sign of peace differently or with more enthusiasm with some parishioners such as family or close friends - this makes sense if you see it as a ritual gesture. It’s the same logic that says the priest should not say people’s names when distributing communion but should treat everyone the same. But I have heard other priest say that you should definitely give a more intimate greeting to your family or to someone you are dating.

It’s confusing.

 

[Sonny89]

Peace and all Good!

You point out an area where I think the Church local could be more consistent. I have heard priests say that you should not share the sign of peace differently or with more enthusiasm with some parishioners such as family or close friends - this makes sense if you see it as a ritual gesture. It’s the same logic that says the priest should not say people’s names when distributing communion but should treat everyone the same. But I have heard other priest say that you should definitely give a more intimate greeting to your family or to someone you are dating.

It’s confusing.

You’re right, it is confusing & this probably contributes in a significant way to the mess that so often unfolds when in comes to the Sign of Peace. Consistency & a certain degree of uniformity are very undervalued.

 

[Tigg]

My parish also hold hands during the Our Father. I really dislike that practice. It makes me nervous and I can’t concentrate on the prayer. All I’m thinking of is how quickly I can drop the hand of the stranger near me. I don’t think of fellow parishioners as being beneath me. I just don’t want to hold hands.

And your wish should be respected. Can you just fold your hands in prayer and bow your head during this time?

Another point - why vigorously shake a person’s hand and speak the words of peace without actually looking at them? This seems to me to be an insincere gesture.

 

[QuestLove]

Sooo, stupid question from a non-catholic christian:
What is the Sign of the Peace?
From the posts it seems as if it is a “greeting” time. Is there a prescribed rule/way to do it, that others were flouting?

 

[randomusername]

Sooo, stupid question from a non-catholic christian:
What is the Sign of the Peace?
From the posts it seems as if it is a “greeting” time. Is there a prescribed rule/way to do it, that others were flouting?

Basically you shake people’s hands and say “Peace be with you”. The problem is that in some parishes people are travelling up and down the Church shaking the hands of lots of people. Where I live you just shake the hands of the people sitting near(in front, behind and beside you) you but apparently in other Churches this happens.

 

[QuestLove]

Basically you shake people’s hands and say “Peace be with you”. The problem is that in some parishes people are travelling up and down the Church shaking the hands of lots of people. Where I live you just shake the hands of the people sitting near(in front, behind and beside you) you but apparently in other Churches this happens.

OK thanks.
Now I can reread and follow the debate

 

[Memaw]

You point out an area where I think the Church local could be more consistent. I have heard priests say that you should not share the sign of peace differently or with more enthusiasm with some parishioners such as family or close friends - this makes sense if you see it as a ritual gesture. It’s the same logic that says the priest should not say people’s names when distributing communion but should treat everyone the same. But I have heard other priest say that you should definitely give a more intimate greeting to your family or to someone you are dating.

It’s confusing.

I don’t like them to say my name. I am trying to keep my mind on Our Lord and that puts the focus on me. I do not like that. It seems it all has to be about us and how “special” we are. That’s very distracting. No wonder many Catholics are loosing their faith in the “Real Presence” of Our Lord, when we are made to be the center of attention. It turns things into ‘me and them’. God Bless, Memaw

 

[sw85]

I like the reminder, in the original article, that simply foregoing the invitation to exchange the sign of peace really is an option. I’ve said this before, since it’s right there in the GIRM, and had it flung in my face that it can only be skipped for serious reason. Evidently the Vatican agrees that the inability of the laity to conduct themselves properly at Mass is serious enough reason.

 

[maryj]

Thank you. Another thing that’s a problem for many is people is having their hands gripped too hard. A firm handshake shouldn’t hurt, but I’m 65 with arthritis in my hands plus FMS. I’ve had others grab my hand and squeeze it so hard it nearly brought tears to my eyes because it hurt. Afterwards I’ve had to rub my hand to try to mitigate the pain. Or they’ve not let go and yanked my arm up at the second part of the Our Father. I don’t hold hands for the Our Father except with my husband, now. And, I’ve learned to extend my hand palm down at the sign of peace because people tend to take my hand more gently and not squeeze the life out of it. As our population ages these are becoming real issues that others need to be aware of.

As for hand sanitizer, if someone with a cold thoughtlessly shakes hands with me I have no problem getting out the hand santitizer and using it. If I get a any flu/cold virus it becomes bronchitis which lasts for weeks. I don’t care what others think when it comes to taking care of my health.

I know how ouchy this is, I have RA in my hands. Little tip, try reaching for their hand first and grab them by the wrist…then there is no squeezing of the hand! I’m rubbing my hands just thinking about it…now back to your regular schedualed debate!!

 

[randomusername]

I don’t like them to say my name. I am trying to keep my mind on Our Lord and that puts the focus on me. I do not like that. It seems it all has to be about us and how “special” we are. That’s very distracting. No wonder many Catholics are loosing their faith in the “Real Presence” of Our Lord, when we are made to be the center of attention. It turns things into ‘me and them’. God Bless, Memaw

I didn’t even know any priests said your name. Even the times we went to mass with my primary school and the priest knew us really well he wouldn’t say our names.

 

[Memaw]

I didn’t even know any priests said your name. Even the times we went to mass with my primary school and the priest knew us really well he wouldn’t say our names.

The priests don’t say names but many of the the EMCHs do. Sorry I didn’t make myself clear on that! The Deacons don’t say them either that I have ever heard. God Bless, Memaw