What ever happened to our church?

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shannonfbc

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I noticed some of the strangest things at mass on sunday as I looked around finding myself quite distracted at mass this past sunday.

First of all the family next to us was having a picnic in the pew literally they had an assortment of food and drink in a large cooler (which is probably what distracted me in the first place).

There were children jumping around and standing on the pews and playing with various toys. There were people there in various states of dress or should I even say undress (I even noticed a few people in track pants/ pajama pants.

Seriously what in the world happened to our church? Am I one of the few left that believes this is the house of god and therefore we need to be dressed in our sunday best, ON TIME, and on our best behaviour… and a picnic??? thats wrong on so many levels 1, its disrespectful, 2 its distracting to those around you 3 your not suppose to eat within an hour of taking communion.

Is this a common thing now at mass or just a strange occurence in our parish? One thing is for certain I wont sit toward the back next week as I really want to be able to hear and focus.
 
shannonfbc said:
I noticed some of the strangest things at mass on sunday as I looked around finding myself quite distracted at mass this past sunday.

First of all the family next to us was having a picnic in the pew literally they had an assortment of food and drink in a large cooler (which is probably what distracted me in the first place).

There were children jumping around and standing on the pews and playing with various toys. There were people there in various states of dress or should I even say undress (I even noticed a few people in track pants/ pajama pants.

Seriously what in the world happened to our church? Am I one of the few left that believes this is the house of god and therefore we need to be dressed in our sunday best, ON TIME, and on our best behaviour… and a picnic??? thats wrong on so many levels 1, its disrespectful, 2 its distracting to those around you 3 your not suppose to eat within an hour of taking communion.

Is this a common thing now at mass or just a strange occurence in our parish? One thing is for certain I wont sit toward the back next week as I really want to be able to hear and focus.
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Though the dress at my parish is rather casual, the only other thing that I think I’d see regularly would be toys to entertain small (e.g., 3-5 year old) children at the 8 a.m. mass. I’m more bothered by the unnecessary use of EMHCs and how . . . uninvolved . . . 90% of our parish laity is. Perhaps “uninvolved” isn’t the right word, but I just wish I was in a parish where going to weekly confession wasn’t so unusual as to be noticed, where abstaining from communion isn’t so unusual so as to be noticed, where parents believe that their teenage child (yes, child) doesn’t get to decide if they want to go to mass on Sunday post-confirmation classes.

But I suppose we can all find things to complain about, which isn’t very helpful.

So when you spoke to the Priest about it, what did he say? If you haven’t had a chance to speak with him yet, please come back and let us know how that conversation develops.

Pax,
OA
 
Here is a notice that was in our parish bulletin this week:

Now that spring is here and summer
is close at hand, we ask that you
and your family dress appropriately
for Mass. Extremely short dresses
and skirts are inappropriate. Short shorts are inappropriate
for men and women, boys and girls. Low cut
blouses and shirts or tank tops are not suitable. Bare
midriffs and bellies or low cut jeans that expose the
stomach are not respectful wear. Dress up for the
house of God!
Those planning weddings should observe these clothing
guidelines as well. Many contemporary brides and
bridesmaid dresses are more appropriate to garden or
outdoor weddings than to church. Please be respectful
of the house of God.
Remember to turn OFF cell phones while in church.
If you must respond to a call, please step outside.
Make God more important than anyone who might call
you– unless someone’s life is depending on you.
Also, chewing gum in church is not appropriate.
And boys and girls, wash your hands! One’s hands are
a throne upon which we receive the Body of Christ.
 
A cooler full of food I have never seen before. A few snacks or a sippy cup in a diaper bag yes. A toy or book for a toddler also. I’ve seen track suits before–particularly on older people who probably have trouble with zippers, buttons etc.

If the entire family was eating out of the cooler, yes you should say something to your priest. If folks are scantily clad you can certainly ask him to mention it in a homily or bulletin announcement (offer to share the one in this thread!)

On the whole though, the best thing we can do about our fellow parishioners dress and behavior at Mass to is sincerely pray for them. If your church has an adoration chapel, commit an hour there each week to pray for your church. Offer to help teach CCD or RCIA so that you can help inform people about proper behavior in church. Make an extra donation to the building fund so that father can keep the air colder during the summer–might get some girls to cover up! 😃
 
I think it is just a more casual time in which we live. At least I hope that is all it is. Irreverence is rampant in our culture, but I do think folks like the OP mentioned still revere God and Church and have only accepted a more casual lifestyle. A relaxed attitude is not a bad thing. Wearing white shoes before Memorial Day isn’t quite the fashion tragedy it used to be, but I really think the relaxed attitude has gone too far. There is something wrong when darling little girls show up to Mass in play clothes and with their hair all a mess from being in bed…not just once in a while but every Sunday. These aren’t poor little girls either, whose parents were never taught about proper grooming and attire.

Sometimes I wonder about it all. I’m only in my thirties, but I remember a generation of ladies who wore girdles, men who wore suits, and people who traveled down the road to the store without water bottles and snack arsenals. Are we maybe just spoiled to comfort and instant gratification?
 
shannonfbc said:
I noticed some of the strangest things at mass on sunday as I looked around finding myself quite distracted at mass this past sunday.

First of all the family next to us was having a picnic in the pew literally they had an assortment of food and drink in a large cooler (which is probably what distracted me in the first place).

There were children jumping around and standing on the pews and playing with various toys. There were people there in various states of dress or should I even say undress (I even noticed a few people in track pants/ pajama pants.

Seriously what in the world happened to our church? Am I one of the few left that believes this is the house of god and therefore we need to be dressed in our sunday best, ON TIME, and on our best behaviour… and a picnic??? thats wrong on so many levels 1, its disrespectful, 2 its distracting to those around you 3 your not suppose to eat within an hour of taking communion.

Is this a common thing now at mass or just a strange occurence in our parish? One thing is for certain I wont sit toward the back next week as I really want to be able to hear and focus.
Click to expand...
Did these people receive Communion ?

Pope Pius saw it coming,

"A day will come when the civilized world will deny its God, when the Church will doubt as Peter doubted. She will be tempted to believe that man has become God. In our churches, Christians will search in vain for the red lamp where God awaits them. Like Mary Magdalene, weeping before the empty tomb, they will ask, “Where have they taken him?” Pope Pius XII
 
I think a lot of this behavior stems from the lack of a belief in the Real Presence. If people went to Church thinking they would be going up to greet the Pope they would probably dress and act much differently. How much more so should we be acting and dressing our best to receive Jesus.
 
shannonfbc said:
I noticed some of the strangest things at mass on sunday as I looked around finding myself quite distracted at mass this past sunday.

First of all the family next to us was having a picnic in the pew literally they had an assortment of food and drink in a large cooler (which is probably what distracted me in the first place).

There were children jumping around and standing on the pews and playing with various toys. There were people there in various states of dress or should I even say undress (I even noticed a few people in track pants/ pajama pants.

Seriously what in the world happened to our church? Am I one of the few left that believes this is the house of god and therefore we need to be dressed in our sunday best, ON TIME, and on our best behaviour… and a picnic??? thats wrong on so many levels 1, its disrespectful, 2 its distracting to those around you 3 your not suppose to eat within an hour of taking communion.

Is this a common thing now at mass or just a strange occurence in our parish? One thing is for certain I wont sit toward the back next week as I really want to be able to hear and focus.
Click to expand...
Not all parishes are like that, but those are the kinds of things you may see since Vatican II. With the Novus Ordo Mass, always expect the un-expected.
 
SpiritusSanctus said:
Not all parishes are like that, but those are the kinds of things you may see since Vatican II. With the Novus Ordo Mass, always expect the un-expected.
Click to expand...
That is an unfair characterization. There is nothing inherently missing or disrespectful in the NO Mass that would cause people to behave this way.
 
The older I get the less I understand people – why couldn’t they have left the food in their car??? Perhaps just kept a couple of cookies/crackers for the “kids” – we have a family Mass every Sunday and while it’s not too quiet it’s wonderful to see all the children – particularly for the “Our Father” because in our Church the priest has the “kids” come up to the altar, hold hands and say the prayer there. It sometimes is amazing how many of the “kids” RUSH up so they could possibly be the one who gets there first and holds Father’s hand. Several months ago a couple had their 9-day old baby in Church with them – I was astounded because I would be afraid that the baby might pick up a couple of “germs”, but the baby slept the whole Mass.
As far as clothes are concerned I always had my children wear nice clothes to Mass – I NEVER wear jeans to Church a/c I don’t think they’re appropriate – most of the people in my Parish dress all right for Mass
 
At_Trent said:
Did these people receive Communion ?

Pope Pius saw it coming,

"A day will come when the civilized world will deny its God, when the Church will doubt as Peter doubted. She will be tempted to believe that man has become God. In our churches, Christians will search in vain for the red lamp where God awaits them. Like Mary Magdalene, weeping before the empty tomb, they will ask, “Where have they taken him?” Pope Pius XII
Click to expand...
I thought I’d seen a lot of Pope Pius XII’s quotes, but this is a new one for me. It is SO prophetic…they **“will search in vain for the red lamp where God awaits them.” ** Before I left the NO. parish that I’d attended since 1985 (It was also the parish that I attended during my high school years, the parish I was married in 50 yrs. ago this week, the parish that Baptized my 3 oldest children)… I asked several people where the Tabernacle was & learned that it was in the “crying room”. :eek:
 
CradleCath said:
I thought I’d seen a lot of Pope Pius XII’s quotes, but this is a new one for me. It is SO prophetic…they **“will search in vain for the red lamp where God awaits them.” ** Before I left the NO. parish that I’d attended since 1985 (It was also the parish that I attended during my high school years, the parish I was married in 50 yrs. ago this week, the parish that Baptized my 3 oldest children)… I asked several people where the Tabernacle was & learned that it was in the “crying room”. :eek:
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All things considered, Cradle, I am sure He deemed it an appropriate place to be (in the crying room)!:o
 
Barb3 said:
The older I get the less I understand people – why couldn’t they have left the food in their car??? Perhaps just kept a couple of cookies/crackers for the “kids” – we have a family Mass every Sunday and while it’s not too quiet it’s wonderful to see all the children – particularly for the “Our Father” because in our Church the priest has the “kids” come up to the altar, hold hands and say the prayer there. It sometimes is amazing how many of the “kids” RUSH up so they could possibly be the one who gets there first and holds Father’s hand. Several months ago a couple had their 9-day old baby in Church with them – I was astounded because I would be afraid that the baby might pick up a couple of “germs”, but the baby slept the whole Mass.
As far as clothes are concerned I always had my children wear nice clothes to Mass – I NEVER wear jeans to Church a/c I don’t think they’re appropriate – most of the people in my Parish dress all right for Mass
Click to expand...
There are many experts here that I know will correct me if I am wrong, but I am pretty sure that that is neither proper or allowed - having little children (or anyone for that matter) run up to the altar and hold hands during the Pater Noster. In fact, holding hands during the Our Father is not allowed at all. Even my liberal pastor tried to dissuade the parishioners from doing it. Some still do, but most have stopped.
 
Lormar said:
There are many experts here that I know will correct me if I am wrong, but I am pretty sure that that is neither proper or allowed - having little children (or anyone for that matter) run up to the altar and hold hands during the Pater Noster. In fact, holding hands during the Our Father is not allowed at all. Even my liberal pastor tried to dissuade the parishioners from doing it.
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Funny, usually it’s at the consecration when priests invite children to come up and stand around the altar. That’s certainly not allowed. However, the Church does not prescribe any posture for the faithful at all during the Pater Noster – hands clasped together, hands in the carrying-a-load-of-wood (orans) posture, holding hands, hands in pockets, etc. None of these is prohibited.
 
Nor are they allowed. My pastor is the Vicar General of the Diocese. If anyone should know, he would. And as liberal as he is, he told us a few years ago that it has no place in the Mass.
 
At_Trent said:
Did these people receive Communion ?

Pope Pius saw it coming,

"A day will come when the civilized world will deny its God, when the Church will doubt as Peter doubted. She will be tempted to believe that man has become God. In our churches, Christians will search in vain for the red lamp where God awaits them. Like Mary Magdalene, weeping before the empty tomb, they will ask, “Where have they taken him?” Pope Pius XII
Click to expand...
Yes the whole entire family was eating and drinking and the whole family (baby not included) took communion.

I can certainly understand toddlers having sippy cups, bottles or even some gold fish crackers or something but an entire family literally having a picnic in the church before taking communion is just not right… I didnt get a chance to speak to Fr. about it as he was quite busy after mass with a crowd but I am more then likely attending mass tomorrow so I certainly will.

The "children playing with barbies were older children between 9 and 12 years of age, and the people wearing track suits and even pajamas were teens and young adults not the old an infirm. I plan on asking the priest about this as well. I dont know if he just cant see past the first few pews of people or if he is ignoring everything so as not to offend anyone.
 
You know what’s ironic about this, when the changes first came in, we were told that they wanted to make the Mass more relevant to the young and meaningful to the adults. They told us we were bored during the old Mass (it was news to most of us who apparently didn’t realize we were). Barbie dolls and food were not on our list of things to bring to Mass back then, and no one would have ever dreamed of doing so.

They still have no place at Mass, and it is disrespectful.
 
Lormar said:
You know what’s ironic about this, when the changes first came in, we were told that they wanted to make the Mass more relevant to the young and meaningful to the adults. They told us we were bored during the old Mass (it was news to most of us who apparently didn’t realize we were). Barbie dolls and food were not on our list of things to bring to Mass back then, and no one would have ever dreamed of doing so.

They still have no place at Mass, and it is disrespectful.
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I think it has very little to do with the changes in the mass and everything to do with our society and the need to be entertained constantly. Just look at the tvs in the cars, and yes they can be a godsend on a long trip, but I know moms who say they can’t live without them for just running errands around town. What happened to just letting the kid be bored and being creative on their own?

And 9 to 12 year olds, if they can sit in a classroom without toys, they can sit in mass without toys. That’s also getting to be the age that girls are no longer interested in Barbies. Kids don’t need to be entertained to the degree that parents think they should.
 
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