What's the point in dating in today's society

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It might not be a bad idea to revisit the concept of social skills. Which ones in particular are really important to you?

I remember I had a neighbour once who thought he had amazing social skills. He called himself a social animal. I agreed with the latter part of the definition. By social, he must have meant he had many people over for late night parties and was inconsiderate of his neighbours. He even left a fire burning in his fire pit while he left his house for 24 hours. I had to douse it in water. So, by social, he must have meant he relies on his neighbours to take care of his problems.

Anyhow, there are worse things than a shy wife, or one who occasionally is at a loss for words. Some social problems do resolve themselves with the help of a gentle, lawyerly husband. Just remember, she won’t be a masterpiece, but rather a work in progress, just like all of us are. And most women, Catholic or not, will be very attracted to your financial position. If you are good looking and wear suits, you will probably have line-ups. On the other hand, if you are a divorce lawyer, Catholic women might be afraid of you.
 
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jdavani said:
The thing about student counseling is that medical records can be subpeonaed by the bar and can hurt your chances of becoming an attorney.
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On the other hand, being an untreated sad sack could keep you from being hired, getting married, or being a good husband or father.
 
I’d never be a catholic divorce lawyer. I consider that an oxymoron. But regarding the whole women finding me attractive based on my financial position–I don’t want women to want me because I’m an attorney or anything. I’d want a woman to want me because I was a good catholic
 
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Xantippe said:
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jdavani:
I’d want a woman to want me because I was a good catholic
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…who looks sharp in a suit.
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And appears happy, not depressed…

So if you feel that you are, get some help, even off campus.
 
Are you saying that going to public school = good social skills?
 
But isn’t that like a woman saying, " I don’t want a man to like me for my looks. I want him to want me for my personality and for the fact I’m Catholic. Therefore, I will wear baggy clothes, leave my hair looking like a mop, and never shave my legs?"

Being a wealth-generating lawyer IS part of your personality. Nothing wrong with money, and she can help you decide how best to spend it.

One thing I’ve learnt is it would be really nice to be able to say yes when people call asking for money. It’s very rare that I can. Wouldn’t it be lovely to be able to support LifeSiteNews, Human Life International, and other pro-family groups?
 
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Yeah. I think you were right before when you said “perhaps you are really not at a point in your life where you are ready”
 
Well, shelve the idea of dating for now. At least actively looking. Let someone find you, while you work on finding peace and some form of happiness in your life.
Really, get some counseling, it will help.
 
Right, I hear what you’re saying but there are many people out there who will just try to use a guy like me and misrepresent their intentions in order to take advantage of my financial situation. There are a lot of golddiggers out there.

And what’s wrong with the girl who wears baggy clothes with the frizzy hair and the unshaved legs?
 
i have to explain this to women a lot, but it doesn’t really work that way for guys. women don’t find men. we’re the ones who find women.

and yeah, i’m done looking. i need to focus on passing the bar in july
 
Wow, you really don’t know about women.

Women chase men but let the guy think it was his idea all along sometimes. 😉
 
Hello.

I don’t understand why you begin your post connecting the words “dating” and “sound financial decision” together. If you are looking for a significant other, is there a price tag to them? I can just see it: College degree, BA, Liberal arts future spouse, $550.00 to date for 3 months of dates. Medical degree, advanced education, $2000.00 to date for 3 months, with extra expenditures to properly impress them. College degree, engineering, 1000.00 for 3 months… sigh…

Also, dates don’t have to be expensive. What is it you’re looking for, financial security or someone you can share your life with? Granted these don’t have to be mutually exclusive, but I sure wouldn’t want someone to look at me as a future meal ticket instead as a human being.

Catholics exist. They have for at least 2000 years. Keep looking, keep praying. Keep an open mind and use your mind. God has a plan for you - are you willing to be open to it? And, you are in my prayers.

You sound angry and disillusioned with the whole search and I am so sorry that the world is in such a state that your search is difficult for you.
 
jdavani said:
i have to explain this to women a lot, but it doesn’t really work that way for guys. women don’t find men. we’re the ones who find women.
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Please…do not explain this anymore to women.
 
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