Where to find a good man

[Augustinian]

I’ve been working 50 hours a week. I gave up on love. The truth is I’m asexual. So it’s hard to find an asexual man. Thanks

There are a lot of men who aren’t interested in sex as well. You might want to expand your age requirements. Fortunately, since you are working long hours, you are probably doing pretty well and have a nice home. That’s certainly a positive in finding a man.

 

[Augustinian]

I think those model turn heads but I don’t think that equates to most men chasing them. Most men live in the real world.

Different men are attracted to different kinds of women- which is just as well. Some guys like younger gals, thinner gals, black women, older women, asian women,fatter ladies, women with jobs.

I wouldn’t say any of them are “creeps” just based on that.

 

[redbetta]

Yes. Old photos, retouched photos, or even someone else’s photos. I think their are engines online through which people can run someone’s profile pic to see if it appears anywhere else online to make sure that photo wasn’t just copied from elsewhere.

 

[Xantippe]

Odd isn’t that almost every super model, bikini, model, playboy model (etc) seem to look between the ages of 16-22. And this seems to exist across cultures across the globe. Guess we are a world of creeps.

I’m going to sentence you to an 8-hour bus ride with 20 16-year-old girls. We’ll see if you want a 16-year-old wife after that.

May God have mercy on your soul!

(My 10th grader just got back from a class trip that involved that 8-hour bus ride both ways. She could barely stand it, and she’s a 15-year-old herself. They were singing Top 40 about half the drive.)

 

[Xantippe]

Not necessary. I know enough men who won´t be shy to say that, because they don´t recognize those catwalk models that much - but the models who are seen single in photoshoots or in the bikini/dessous section are mostly older than 16. T

Also, in real life, a lot of guys would be uncomfortable squiring around a 5’10" woman. (I was just looking at the bios for the Victoria’s Secret models, and the ones I looked at ranged from 5’9" to 6’1". Add 3" heels and the average guy would be intimidated.

 

[Augustinian]

Also, in real life, a lot of guys would be uncomfortable squiring around a 5’10" woman.

Your fashion model types are a lot taller and thinner in real life than they appear on TV or in magazines. I did go to a fashion show a number of years ago, it was really a revelation.

 

[Theo520]

Different men are attracted to different kinds of women- which is just as well. Some guys like younger gals, thinner gals, black women, older women, asian women,fatter ladies, women with jobs.

I wouldn’t say any of them are “creeps” just based on that.

There are also different types of attraction. A waxed and shiny new sports car looks really good, but the exterior finish is low on my wish list for a new/used car.

My care needs to be attractive (pleasing, not HOT) but also comfy and useful, room to haul stuff and very reliable. I would absolutely hate to own a high end sports car 360 days of the year. Couldn’t afford the maintenance either (time & $). Hey, this is a good relationship analogy as well, I couldn’t afford the maintenance on a young model. Probably couldn’t have a decent conversation with her either.

 

[ChunkMonk]

Well, biologically speaking, they are adults. And that ‘better nature’ usually tends to be pushed by older women who feel threatened by the idea of men pursuing younger women.

16 us obviously very young for a man in his 20s to pursue for marriage, but as far as attraction goes, nothing wrong with it at all. And honestly, as long as the two people in question are being chaste and mature, (with consent of parents) I don’t see the problem with a ~25 year old man courting a 16-17 year old girl. Personally, I would wait for 18 before I showed interest, but there’s nothing inherently ‘wrong’ with it. It could be wrong in many (maube most) individual cases, but its not inherently wrong in and of itself.

 

[Norseman82]

I would find it creapy if a man would be mainly interested in my fertility. I´m not a chicken on a farm. And no, it´s not over with 25++.

It’s a legitimate concern if a man wants to start a family in the old-fashioned way, so to speak…

 

[JamalChristophr]

Can we really not a start a new thread for this? Seems like a pretty big detour from the OP to me, anyways.

 

[Kathleen18]

My family has a phrase when the subject of discussion has gotten out of hand. We say, “How’s the peach crop, growing?”
Hint: There is no peach crop.

 

[on_the_hill]

Well, biologically speaking, they are adults. And that ‘better nature’ usually tends to be pushed by older women who feel threatened by the idea of men pursuing younger women.

This is a joke, right? And by older, you mean women who’ve aged out of the fertile years, say 24 or 25 years old, I guess.

16 us obviously very young for a man in his 20s to pursue for marriage, but as far as attraction goes, nothing wrong with it at all.

We won’t agree, so there’s no point in continuing. FWIW, I don’t care how chaste he is, he’d never in a million years get permission to “court” my daughter.

 

[on_the_hill]

In Pgh, we’d say, “How 'bout them Buccos?”

Bucs/Buccos being nicknames for the Pirates, short for buccaneer.

 

[on_the_hill]

I would find it creapy if a man would be mainly interested in my fertility. I´m not a chicken on a farm. And no, it´s not over with 25++.

And to think my wife was a bit miffed when the doctor categorized her as “advanced maternal age,” at 35.

 

[Lea101]

Any decent dad…heck even my own dad would never allow his teen to date a 25 year old. It’s creepy and girls at that age aren’t mature (brains don’t even fully develop and they have a lot to learn first). Date someone your own age or wait till she’s an adult…

 

[on_the_hill]

Folks, folks: I think some people here are getting very judgmental. Does anyone remember what we are told about that (judging people) in the Bible?

Yes, we as men like younger gals. So? In the words of the great Dean Martin: “The world still is the same you’ll never change it, as sure as the stars shine above…” It was true in Biblical times (as someone pointed out, above) and it will always be true. It’s biological, not cultural.

As a side note: as a classicist I find it hilarious that people employ anglicized latin terms to condemn attraction to “adolescents”. The concept (adolescence) actually included people from ages 14 to 28 years old in ancient times. You are not really saying anything, or, at least not what you think you are when you use those terms. It’s a very revisionistic type of approach.

Why argue about this? And, how on Earth is that going to help the original poster (who on top of everything has just told us that she doesn’t even go for that kind of attraction)?

Compassion, compassion…

I’ll try to use compassion here.
A. The older I get the older attractive women get. When I was 20 I’d never look twice at a woman in her 30s or 40s. Now that I’m 50, I won’t look twice at a woman younger than 40.
B. It may be “biological” but we, as human beings, are called to control ourselves and abide by social mores. To excuse it as “biological” is to grant permission to all sorts of stuff that we refrain from doing.
C. As a classicist, you ought to be aware that word meanings, social constructs, etc. change over time. No one in the modern world would consider a person over the age of 19 an adolescent, regardless of what the word meant in ancient times. Sorry. I’m not impressed with the trivia lesson being used to leverage borderline red pill logic.

 

[on_the_hill]

And what’s with using the term “gals”? The only kid I knew who used that term without irony was in high school and he never got any dates. If we call them gals are we going to revise ourselves back to the 1950s, when it was common for men in their 20s and 30s to marry teenage girls?

Oh. . . wait . . . .that never happened, even during the good ol’ days.

 

[Lea101]

Settle? Middle aged? Fascist? Bully? Oh jeez.

 

[Xantippe]

Any decent dad…heck even my own dad would never allow his teen to date a 25 year old. It’s creepy and girls at that age aren’t mature (brains don’t even fully develop and they have a lot to learn first). Date someone your own age or wait till she’s an adult…

Yeah. At that age, you think you’re super mature, but you’re not. (Ask anybody with a 16-year-old younger sister.)

 

[Xantippe]

this is not a thread to bully others into believing we should settle for middle aged women (or anything else).

23-year-old women are not “middle aged” and may actually have 20-25 years of fertility ahead of them.