Women, how should catholic men treat you?

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Well we have to agree to disagree. It’s not as ridiculous as you think.

Chivalry and courtesy are not interchangeable.

Chivalry comes from the French term cheval or horse and a chevalier is a Knight. The whole lady, usually a noblewoman, on a pedestal sort of thing.

We should use the term courtesy, much better.
 
JulianN said:
But I can’t tell you how often they very awkwardly try to grab the door from me instead
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Were they trying to take the door from you or wanting to hold it open for you instead? Not sure what you mean.
 
Hussie is not outdated. A lot of people have hussie fits when they get mad…or is that hissy?
 
I’m ahead of a man by several yards, get to the door first and hold it open for him to go through. Instead of going through and saying thanks, he tries to take the door from me. It’s weird, but it happens fairly often.
 
Chivalry did start out with noble ideals rooted in Christianity but over time became more rooted in secular romantic literature and thus became more about putting ladies on pedestals.

A character in Miguel Cervantes Don Quixote says of chivalry as follows

Little by little, the seriousness and austerity of former times lost their value. The whole trend was toward gaiety, affability and festivity. Hearts began to shy away from the love of sacrifice, from true devotion to the Cross, and from the aspiration to sanctity and eternal life. The literature of love invaded all countries. Chivalry, formerly one of the highest expressions of Christian austerity, became amorous and sentimental.
 
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Yes, I agree he should say thanks. I suspect some men are not used to a woman stopping and holding a door open for him and him walking ahead first. Just a thought. I haven’t had that happen before.
 
Mi_Rose said:
People where I live open doors for each other with a smile. The man I have been married to for 47 years does laundry dishes and some of the cleaning.
I want to be treated as a human being with value. Don’t assume I am stupid. Don’t talk down to or over me.
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I don’t want to be assumed as stupid either. But lately I feel that as I am. You know what? Whatever! Whoever thinks my comments aren’t good enough too bad for them because I meant nothing to harm anyone. But I cannit lie or keep on rephrasing things by fear someone will missunderstand me. Someone WILL missunderstand me without a doubt. I mean nothing but being honest my heart on a plate. Some may eat it if they need it.
 
I was hoping that would be your answer. I agree. We fulfill different roles.
 
It was that your comments made it sound as if cooking and washing dishes were more women’s roles than men’s. Which, of course, they are not—so I thought you were joking.
 
Canvas said:
It could be like Mad Men. They all dressed really snazzy, but it isn’t like most of the characters on the show were models of morality. That guy looks all gentlemanly and well dressed, but he could be also a drunken adulterer. That maybe ain’t his wife and he has been day drinking since before 10 am.
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I mean…you can kinda just say that about anyone. “Yes, he acts like a saint in public, but who knows what he does in private!”
 
I didn’t mean to imply the people in the picture were actually doing anything improper. I was just pointing out that being clean cut with apparently good manners can cover a multitude of sin.
 
It was in the past and at my house it is more my role even if my husband helps but he has two jobs. I’m happy to do it, even when I’m tired. I actually know many couples where the women does the housework and men work outside the home, they are happy as can be.
 
Sure. But that’s not a requirement or normative. My husband and I both work full time. I surely don’t expect to be doing all the housework—after all, we both use the house.
 
Lea101 said:
if you want to open a door lol. Some women like it, some women don’t
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Those who don’t like men or anyone holding doors open for them better avoid Wawa convenience stores. Everyone holds doors for everyone. Wawa will never change to automatic doors because people tell the company that going to their stores is like going to the most civilized and polite place on the planet.
 
Yes, and this is true. Hopefully, though, he was just a fine gentleman.
 
JulianN said:
I’m ahead of a man by several yards,
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Barbara Walters returned to Afghanistan ten years after her wee publicized visit, and wanted to see how women had progressed.

To her horror, rather than walking ten feet behind the men, they were now back by 20!

“Why?” she asked.

“Land mines.”

😜🤣:roll_eyes:
JulianN said:
Instead of going through and saying thanks, he tries to take the door from me.
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I would at least offer.

In fact, I probably would have sped up to get the the door before you if possible, and opened it . . .

(and, yes, I walk around the car to open the door for my wife.)
MarthaSo said:
I actually know many couples where the women does the housework and men work outside the home, they are happy as can be.
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It worked well for us.

Then again, I’m not allowed to touch her fancy machines (after I buy and install them. And until they need repair). Something about the state of my clothing while we were dating (and I was doing laundry) . . .

hawk, who usually isn’t allowed in the kitchen, either . . .
 
My old manager used to do that. So irritating. That form of chivalry is more about a man protecting his ego than about being polite to the woman.
 
Exactly. I’m appreciative when someone holds the door for me. But this very awkward dance that occurs when a man rushes up to grab a door I’m already holding open is just annoying.
 
dochawk said:
It worked well for us.

Then again, I’m not allowed to touch her fancy machines (after I buy and install them. And until they need repair). Something about the state of my clothing while we were dating (and I was doing laundry) . . .

hawk, who usually isn’t allowed in the kitchen, either . . .
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I used to keep my husband out of the kitchen and the laundry room. By the time baby number 3 came around, I was happy to let him help occasionally. By the time baby number 6 was here, I was just happy to have it done, even if it wasn’t done to my specifications. With kids and husbands, you’ve got to lower your standards.
 
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