All the single ladies ... and men

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Wasn’t commenting on your bosses or your family. We all have those.
Way to miss the point of comparison. I was talking about critics. I can tell you’re not surrounded by those on the same level as mine. Takes a lot of work filtering the good from the bad and I need a woman who will cut me a break and stay content. :rolleyes:
 
Well, here’s the thing. When you compare your future perfect person to Mary, you inevitably draw similarities with her counterpart, Joseph. So, the natural tendency (which was perhaps at best, merely implied) to compare between yourself and Joseph is set in place by your comments.
That is your misconception. Don’t blame me if you forget that Joseph was only a foster. The theological concept of Mary submitting to God’s will was my focus, not the fact the Joseph was her hubby.
It seems like the only zinger you have in your arsenal, so to speak, is to condescendingly speak of the typicality of other individuals’ reaction to your rather… startling list of green flags.
The fact that you consider it condescending and startling only makes it more typical. But go ahead. Keep at it. It’ll also be proof with what’s going on with women in this century. 👍
There is a huge difference between saying that you want someone who’s more introverted or quiet versus you want someone who’s passive and obedient. Perhaps it was merely the wording choices here, but the latter is much more of a red flag to some (including myself) here.
You’re right there’s a huge difference. And is in that huge difference that I prefer the latter because how you described the former is but a subtler version of what I’m tired of.

I’ve met plenty of introverted quiet-types. They are not shy. They are anti-social. There’s an even bigger difference there. At best, they’re just female versions of me. They don’t say anything but are always just as snide and cynical as I am. Like me, they just like to hide but that does not change that which was hidden. As much as I sympathize with them, one internal critic is bad enough without marrying one who is just like it.

That’s different from wanting someone who comes across as sheltered and reminiscent of some saints.

And again, I don’t see why you’re making this such a big deal when there are millions of women out there in the planet. I only want one of them to be like what I described. Not sure why some of you are freaking out but I know enough to expect it.
 
That is your misconception. Don’t blame me if you forget that Joseph was only a foster. The theological concept of Mary submitting to God’s will was my focus, not the fact the Joseph was her hubby.

The fact that you consider it condescending and startling only makes it more typical. But go ahead. Keep at it. It’ll also be proof with what’s going on with women in this century. 👍

You’re right there’s a huge difference. And is in that huge difference that I prefer the latter because how you described the former is but a subtler version of what I’m tired of.

I’ve met plenty of introverted quiet-types. They are not shy. They are anti-social. There’s an even bigger difference there. At best, they’re just female versions of me. They don’t say anything but are always just as snide and cynical as I am. Like me, they just like to hide but that does not change that which was hidden. As much as I sympathize with them, one internal critic is bad enough without marrying one who is just like it.

That’s different from wanting someone who comes across as sheltered and reminiscent of some saints.

And again, I don’t see why you’re making this such a big deal when there are millions of women out there in the planet. I only want one of them to be like what I described. Not sure why some of you are freaking out but I know enough to expect it.
Hey man, obedience is an admirable quality in women. The humility to swallow pride and follow your spouse is definitely a praiseworthy thing. However, I can sort of understand why some would question your desire of this particular virtue in a woman. I expect it might just be the way you wrote it, but you sort of come across as wanting someone to dominate or control. Obedience is a quality that must be earned in a relationship. It takes trust. Now obviously there are some who see submission as an insane, nonsensical thing that females should avoid like the plague, but you can’t expect someone to just fall at your feet or ‘‘stay content’’ just because you want them to, with little to no work on your part. I’m not bashing your opinion, but perhaps you might consider what your future wife might want as well.
 
Hey man, obedience is an admirable quality in women. The humility to swallow pride and follow your spouse is definitely a praiseworthy thing. However, I can sort of understand why some would question your desire of this particular virtue in a woman. I expect it might just be the way you wrote it, but you sort of come across as wanting someone to dominate or control. Obedience is a quality that must be earned in a relationship. It takes trust. Now obviously there are some who see submission as an insane, nonsensical thing that females should avoid like the plague, but you can’t expect someone to just fall at your feet or ‘‘stay content’’ just because you want them to, with little to no work on your part. I’m not bashing your opinion, but perhaps you might consider what your future wife might want as well.
That’s exactly what I want to do! I want someone to devote myself to and who can wholeheartedly appreciate the hard work I’ve done. When you’re surrounded by critics (good or bad), that type of appreciation is hard to tell! Someone always has something to point out. I mean, I’m willing to take criticism and objectively improve but good God, what I wouldn’t do to have at least her as the one person in my life to be 100% supportive. She doesn’t have to be bright or completely correct but just has that innocent faith and trust in me as a spouse! I’ve got already the support of my leaders, my family, my friends, and even my enemies if I’m looking for suggestions. All I need now is just someone to support me in a more heartfelt, spiritual way.

Is that too much to ask from just one among you millions of girls? 🤷
 
I’ve got already the support of my leaders, my family, my friends, and even my enemies if I’m looking for suggestions.
You’ve got the support of your enemies?:eek:Then what are you complaining about?:confused:
Dude! I’ve been hanging out at all the wrong places. Where do you find enemies like that?!:hypno:
 
You’ve got the support of your enemies?:eek:Then what are you complaining about?:confused:
Dude! I’ve been hanging out at all the wrong places. Where do you find enemies like that?!:hypno:
Ohohoho! Anyone can get the ‘support’ of their enemies. It just so happens they misinterpret it as ‘stealing’, ‘spying’, or ‘giving themselves away’. :cool:
 
We could just discuss my list. That way, we’re not jumping the sharks. 🙂
 
:hmmm::juggle: I am confused, bewildered, intrigued and made curious by this thread. The escalation, explanation and interpretation seem to fill me with exasperation and exaltation. Wonderous yet ponderous how one could say without much delay with a certain wordplay that much opinion can have such dominion over the ever so modest meticulous muscle that miraculously measures and manipulates the spiritual material of a mind trying to find the very kind of thought that is brought and perhaps sometimes even bought by others…how interteresting I must say.:tiphat:
 
Way to miss the point of comparison. I was talking about critics. I can tell you’re not surrounded by those on the same level as mine. Takes a lot of work filtering the good from the bad and I need a woman who will cut me a break and stay content. :rolleyes:
Yeah, it does sound like I’m not as surrounded by criticism as you are. Ever think about why that is, other than to wring your hands and say “Woe is me”?
The fact that you consider it condescending and startling only makes it more typical. But go ahead. Keep at it. It’ll also be proof with what’s going on with women in this century. 👍
Holy cow, man, just keep right on digging yourself in deeper. 😃 You should totally make a sign of the above phrase, and just hold it up to every potential partner you meet…that should get your ideas across pretty quick.

Be sure you have someone recording the results. I bet the resulting ~SLAP~ would echo for a full twenty seconds, depending on where it was you were both standing. 👍
 
Huehuehuehue, well…
I’m not looking, I just think It’d be fun to do this instead of debating here on CAF 😉

First of all loves the trinity, Mary, and Catholic/Looking to be Catholic
Musician, loves music similar music 😃 I like rock, celtic, piano, metal, metalcore, hardcore, acoustic…
loves food haha
Long hair a plus.
Has a sense of humor, because I am a goof at times.
Somewhat introverted.
push each other to stay in shape
Practicing Catholic of course!
Financially stable
PRO-LIFE
Would like to go on outdoor trips
Would like to be active in the church/volunteer
willing to donate/sponsor kids
Help me stay away from saying curse words:blush:
Smoke free!

NO NO’S

Self absorbed
greedy
rude
inconsiderate
potty mouth
lazy
act all “macho man”
ladies man
contradicting beliefs
pro-choice
cafeteria Catholic
listens to degrading music (mostly rap, even thought not all is like that, I dislike rap)
Smoking and drugs

Just a list for fun…huahua
 
Okay, for me as a guy here is my list, even though I have a hard time coming up with one since i don’t have much dating experience and in some cases don’t know what I want

Anyway.

Green Flags
  1. Has to be Catholic, or at least a Christian who is open to it (by open I mean can accept I am Catholic, it doesn’t mean they’d have to convert)
  2. Is strong in their beliefs. I don’t want somebody who changes at the drop of the hat
  3. Drinks and can have a good time (without getting drunk of course!)
  4. Intelligence and love of learning
  5. loves to have good conversations and can talk about anything and everything
  6. Is a nerd who can have the same interests as me, or at least understand my interests
  7. Someone I can grow in faith with.
  8. Has a sense of humor
  9. A mix of being shy and innocent, and being lively and vivacious.
  10. Is able to accept me for who I am (i’d be willing to do the same)
Red Flags
  1. Not religious
  2. Has a lot of Drama in their lives
  3. Drinks too much
  4. Smokes and has no intention of quitting (I could date someone who is trying to quit)
  5. Isn’t big into partying or big gatherings (i’m more of a chill kind of person who hangs with a few friends, and i know theirs noting wrong with parties, its just a preference)
  6. Is promiscuous
  7. Has cheated in the past (I’ve always feared that i’d be the guy who was cheated on)
  8. Is mean to family and friends even if she says “she doesn’t mean it”
  9. Is more interested in material things than people or faith, or anything else for that matter.
  10. Watches reality TV or shows that are dumb like Jersey Shore or other MTV junk
 
Alright, alright… take it easy there Dr. Seuss.
hahaha, what can I say, sometimes you just have to smile… my lunacy aside. This is an interesting topic of discussion especially nowadays amid the “hook up” culture (interesting Fr. Barron video i was watching) :

1- youtube.com/watch?v=FSrYR2XvR6A
2- youtube.com/watch?v=4BOkYHpupVs
And
3- youtube.com/watch?v=nesRaOKp_G0

likes, dislikes, things we are and are not attracted to seem to play their roles in these things, quite fascinating. in college I think I see various hints of this.
 
Green Light:
  1. Christian, preferably Catholic
  2. Confident
  3. Treats everyone courteously, but is extra gracious to the elderly
  4. Respects authority
  5. On the dominant side (more of a leader than a follower)
  6. Intellectual
  7. Analytical
  8. Cool-headed
  9. Not afraid to argue a point, but can do so in a calm manner
  10. Handy around the house
  11. Financially responsible
  12. Takes pleasure in simple things
  13. Has a healthy appetite
  14. Physically affectionate (doesn’t have to *initiate , but doesn’t mind if I *do :))
  15. Appreciative of simple gestures/favors
Red Light:
  1. Doesn’t get along with parents/siblings
  2. Poor work ethic
  3. Large amount of frivolous debt
  4. Thinks strip clubs and pornography are harmless
  5. Abuses alcohol
    **6. Has a child from a past relationship and does not provide financial and/or emotional support for him/her
  6. History of infidelity
  7. Never accepts responsibility for any wrong-doing and/or cannot apologize**
👍👍👍
 
I’ll start with what turns me off:
  • Noisy
  • Nagging
  • Strongheaded
  • Arrogant
  • Ill-tempered
  • High-maintenance
  • Chatty
  • Irreligious
  • Bossy
  • Self-righteous
  • … and anything that reminds of the Dumb Beverly Hills Blonde stereotype
As for what turns me on:
  • Quiet
  • Timid
  • Shy
  • Religious
  • Kind
  • Naive
  • Obedient
  • Soft-spoken
  • Gullible
  • Religious
  • Trusting
  • Faithful
  • …basically anything that has Ingenue written all over her.
Your green flags makes me wonder… : ) It’s a little bit scary to be honest 🙂
 
I really don’t understand how one would be able to classify Mary as “passive” or “obedient” without qualifying your descriptives. When God told Mary that she was to carry his son, she did not shyly bat away her eyes and say in a girlish whisper, “Umm, I’m sorry, but I have to consult Joseph on this one.” Mary was obedient to God as all of us should be, man or woman. I think where many (including myself) have a difficult time with your statements are when it seems as though your ideal is a lady who cannot make a decision for herself, who is not her own woman, and who is rather the stereotypical 1950s housewife with no ideas or will of her own.
👍👍👍
 
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