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Methodi
Guest
A mortal sin requires full consent which in most cases is not there as I said most sins of the flesh are spontaneous
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LilyM
Guest
He redeemed those who accept that redemption. Including repenting when they sin and striving as best they can to avoid sin in the first place.
Those who do not accept, do not repent and do not strive not to sin, are damned.
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LilyM
Guest
Spontaneous doesn’t mean lacking in consent. Learn the difference. Except in a case of rape, or being too drugged to consent, or mental defect of some kind, or similar, all sexual sins are consensual (unforced).
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Methodi
Guest
I knew that Lily
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Methodi
Guest
spontaneous does lack full consent, when we reach a certain height of passion, there is no return, why do U think so many cannot contain themselves
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jmcrae
Guest
By the time they reach the point of no return, the motel room has already been booked and paid cash for (which means going to the bank and getting out the cash), the lies have already been told, and the secret communications about where and when to meet have already occurred - all of which happens in the sober light of day, before any touching or passionate embracing even begins.
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LilyM
Guest
That’s the biggest load of BS I’ve ever heard.
I don’t care what ‘heights of passion’ a man or woman reaches, if their father or mother or child or spouse (assuming they’re in the midst of an adulterous act) were to walk into the room I can assure you that they would indeed be able to stop DEAD cold right there and then. Ask any parent, child or spouse that it’s happened to!
Anyone who is capable of stopping the act, as everyone would in such a situation, is capable of not sinning and IS fully consenting.
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Methodi
Guest
Not in every case & U know it Jim, how many teens are having sex in their own homes while their parents are away
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LilyM
Guest
Like I said, if the parents walked through that door you can bet they’d stop IMMEDIATELY. If they can stop (and they can) then they’re consenting.
Goes to make my point. I know I’ve stopped because I thought someone might be coming into the house (we were in the loungeroom) - and no ‘height of passion’ whatsoever would’ve induced me to continue until I was sure they weren’t!
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Methodi
Guest
Your a hardhearted lady Lily, U sound as if U never did a wrong thing, have a little compassion instead of condemning so
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kage_ar
Guest
The minute Jimmy calls up Suzy and says “mom and dad are gone, come on over” - there was consent.
Or, do teens of the opposite sex just appear in the room in your little world?
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Methodi
Guest
Yeh I do have a little world, about as little as yours is, The most perfect kage, U must have been conceived with out sin Kage
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LilyM
Guest
Of course I’ve done plenty of wrong things, sexually and otherwise. I don’t speak from ignorance, believe me, I wouldn’t even enter into a topic if I knew nothing of it.
And I certainly don’t lack compassion. I happen to think that making excuses and looking for grey areas in regard to sin is the least compassionate thing one can do in some cases - precisely because I’ve done it far too often in the past myself.
I know that the only time I make any progress in regard to sin is when I ‘man up’, acknowledge my sin for what it is, my consent to sin for what it is and give myself a bit of tough love.
You know as well as I do that there are plenty of places we and the OP can get a pat on the back and sugar coating if any of us wants it, and I know for one it does not a bit of good for me.
Just my :twocents:
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Methodi
Guest
I dont speak from ignorance either, everything I think & feel came from things I heard from My Church over the years. We have all been exposed to different things led different lives etc therefore we have different outlooks, But U act as if Your word is law & I doubt itOf course I’ve done plenty of wrong things, sexually and otherwise. I don’t speak from ignorance, believe me, I wouldn’t even enter into a topic if I knew nothing of it, and I certainly don’t lack compassion.
But I tell you, I know that the only time I make any progress in regard to sin is when I ‘man up’, acknowledge my sin for what it is, my consent to sin for what it is and give myself a bit of tough love.
You know as well as I do that there are plenty of places we and the OP can get a pat on the back and sugar coating if any of us wants it, and I know for one it does not a bit of good for me.
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LilyM
Guest
Not law - just a totally untried option in most cases, and one that would probably do a world of good for many folks if it WERE tried!
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LeroyCRHP
Guest
Sounds like from the first post you have not renounced your sin and you know this. I think he did renounce his sin and is giving his marriage a chance and I’m guessing this is why he is able to attend church.
You do need to get over the married man. This is your choice on what to do. Don’t let the married man tempt you, not to judge someone, but he seems evil for what you have described. What do you think he might do if married to you? Faithful doesn’t come to my mind.
You do need to get over the married man. This is your choice on what to do. Don’t let the married man tempt you, not to judge someone, but he seems evil for what you have described. What do you think he might do if married to you? Faithful doesn’t come to my mind.
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totallostmyway
Guest
Guess I wasn’t clear when I said “when the dust settles…”…I didn’t have any intention to start the affair the first time, or even the second time it happened. Sometimes it is just hard to believe that people can be so dishonest in the intent of their heats, souls and wills. Guess cause that is not really a part of who I am. I really do try to be a good person, go out of my way for others, am always there for always, just try to do the next right thing. I trust before I mistrust.
I have been down the “victim” road. I have every right to say “I am a victim of the MM and of my ex husband” but I don’t. I have every right to hate my ex husband, talk down about him, etc but I don’t. I am just trying to understand why people do what they do when they say they love someone. I have 2 daughters who tell me how wrong I was treated by my ex, how I should hate him, and honestly, I don’t. I have from the last day he threw me down the stairs and even now just hoped he would find the right way to treat people, especially his children. The MM was the corner stone of both of my childrens spritual life and I guess that is what I am struggle with too. I just want to find my way back and yes I have thought of moving and trying somewhere else, but reality is, I can’t do that. This MM is tied to the church up the ranks to the bishop. That is what makes this situation so difficult for me to find anyone to help. The church I always called home is 1 mile from my house, I can’t even pass it without crying. Both of my girls know this, both of them struggle with the conflict and the rhetoric. My youngest still goes, even helps with retreats etc because she has been told that she is not pay for the sins of me, which is the only sound advice I have heard so far from them. Of the one deacon that had come forward to try to help, he has since removed himself from this diocese because of the mixed messages that are being sent. Yes I know that the RC church is the only on true church, but I think even god has to understand that his “houses” here by me can’t be my HOME. So again, what is the next closest church/faith to start the journey?
I have been down the “victim” road. I have every right to say “I am a victim of the MM and of my ex husband” but I don’t. I have every right to hate my ex husband, talk down about him, etc but I don’t. I am just trying to understand why people do what they do when they say they love someone. I have 2 daughters who tell me how wrong I was treated by my ex, how I should hate him, and honestly, I don’t. I have from the last day he threw me down the stairs and even now just hoped he would find the right way to treat people, especially his children. The MM was the corner stone of both of my childrens spritual life and I guess that is what I am struggle with too. I just want to find my way back and yes I have thought of moving and trying somewhere else, but reality is, I can’t do that. This MM is tied to the church up the ranks to the bishop. That is what makes this situation so difficult for me to find anyone to help. The church I always called home is 1 mile from my house, I can’t even pass it without crying. Both of my girls know this, both of them struggle with the conflict and the rhetoric. My youngest still goes, even helps with retreats etc because she has been told that she is not pay for the sins of me, which is the only sound advice I have heard so far from them. Of the one deacon that had come forward to try to help, he has since removed himself from this diocese because of the mixed messages that are being sent. Yes I know that the RC church is the only on true church, but I think even god has to understand that his “houses” here by me can’t be my HOME. So again, what is the next closest church/faith to start the journey?
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LilyM
Guest
Firstly - just because he knows the Bishop doesn’t mean the Bishop will think it’s right that he gets off scot free while you are denied a place to worship. It’s a fundamental right of every single Catholic, whatever their situation, that they be allowed to attend Mass - more than that, you’re obligated to. I don’t think the Bishop will look terribly kindly on anyone being denied this right and being unable to fulfil this obligation for the insufficient reasons you’ve given us.
And if your bishop doesn’t listen to you, you can certainly take it further - the USCCB, the Papal Nuncio, the Vatican. Your MM’s influence assuredly doesn’t extend quite so far as that!
This is your immortal soul we’re talking about, and you owe it to yourself and are obliged to God to try every available avenue to be permitted to attend Mass.
As for moving - why can’t you move? What is there in your town that is so benefitting you that it outweighs all the trauma and spiritual peril you’re putting yourself through? Nothing on this earth is worth that. Your children are grown and well able to live on their own.
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totallostmyway
Guest
Y can’t I move? economics aside, it is fair to my daughter to try to uproot her or send her out on her own when it is my duty to do help her do the very best and be the very best that she can be? She is presently in college, on scholarship, holding a 4.O average. To ask her to find a place to live and support herself at this point would be unreasonable. She has been through so much in last few years, change of “family” and her father being who he is to her(which is not very nice–pushes her aside for his new family–) and me being the only parent left to help, listen and try to keep her focused on her dreams, goals etc. Yes she does attend mass, and yes has a major issue with all of this and there treatment of me. She did not belive that things were as wide spread as I stated until she started asking questions. This am I quiet went in to church, sat in the back and was promptly asked to leave as the father saw me there.No this is not the church MM attends anymore… just has ties due to the rural nature of where we live…
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BSHoop96
Guest
actually, if we are Catholic, we should know that.
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