Catholic dating websites. Ummmm

  • Thread starter Thread starter SacredHeartBassist
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Unless she expressly consented to a prenuptual agreement that stated otherwise. And if you read what I wrote above, I wrote that I wanted her to have her own attorney too. Read all the comments. I don’t want it to just benefit me. The fact of the matter is, I’d be coming into a marriage with about 3 million worth of assets. I can’t afford to think differently when I have much more at stake than my colleagues with 120k in debt.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
I don’t think prenups invalidate catholic marriages unless they’re made in anticipation of divorce. I don’t want to ever get divorced. If I had a prenup it would serve the purpose of rewarding a marriage that doesn’t end in divorce
Click to expand...
This isn’t what Canon lawyers have determined. That is the anticipation of divorce. That’d make the marriage invalid, especially if she is put under the treat–and yes it’s a threat-- that divorcing you would mean she doesn’t even get the bare requirements of law.
SacredHeartBassist said:
My dad is mentally ill and I don’t want to ever live with another mentally ill person again
Click to expand...
Marrying someone who is mentally healthy does NOT guarantee that you will never live with someone mentally ill. Mental illness can occur after birth. You may even have a mentally ill child.

In all reality, someone who works on their mental health, is aware of it and treats it is probably a better candidate for marriage than someone who thinks they need no help.

A wise priest told us that one of our “requirements” in marriage should be that the other person was always willing to seek a counselor.
SacredHeartBassist said:
If you think divorcing someone after 5 years and not getting alimony is financial hell then wow
Click to expand...
It’s the attitude. You get married. You have a couple little kids and your wife is a SAHM. She’s more or less doing her best with little kids but one day one wakes up early from a nap, sneaks into your mancave, breaks into the closet and manages to irreparably destroy your beloved uke while she’s tending to the baby. Don’t tell me it can’t happen. My eldest could pick any lock by about one and a half. I know someone who’s 6yo has figured out every single lock, including ones my MENSA puzzlers.

You do not sound like you’d react in a level-headed way.

If she thought that whatever reaction was unreasonable and asked for a divorce/separation to protect the children, then yeah, It’d be hell to try to stay married just so she–especally if she quit working–could provide for the children.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
Unless she expressly consented to a prenuptual agreement that stated otherwise. And if you read what I wrote above, I wrote that I wanted her to have her own attorney too. Read all the comments. I don’t want it to just benefit me. The fact of the matter is, I’d be coming into a marriage with about 3 million worth of assets. I can’t afford to think differently when I have much more at stake than my colleagues with 120k in debt.
Click to expand...
Honestly, the $ amount you have is irrelevant. It truly doesn’t matter if it’s -$5 or -$500k or $50 million.

You want to talk about finances get a financial advisor.

BTW, I could never afford an attorney before I was married, nevermind one practiced in prenuptial law. I don’t think most people can.
 
Last edited:
I already talked to my priest about it who knows my situation way more than you do and it’s not and I would be permitted to have one if I wanted to protect my assets because of how it would be written
Xanthippe_Voorhees said:
You have a couple little kids and your wife is a SAHM. She’s more or less doing her best with little kids but one day one wakes up early from a nap, sneaks into your mancave, breaks into the closet and manages to irreparably destroy your beloved uke while she’s tending to the baby
Click to expand...
You’ve assumed so much about me based on so little. I wouldn’t react poorly at all. It’s just a ukulele. I’d be really sad because it meant a lot to me but if I had a wife that stayed at home and took care of my children, she’d be the most important thing in my life and I’d just be happy she wasn’t hurt.
 
I have an accountant. He also said given the current climate its important to get a prenuptual agreement.
 
Xanthippe_Voorhees said:
A wise priest told us that one of our “requirements” in marriage should be that the other person was always willing to seek a counselor.
Click to expand...
@SacredHeartBassist would you be willing?

This is now for me the crux of the matter. We all really don’t care about your money, neither does Jesus—he actually cares more about the fact you are so fixated about it. 😉 Protecting your assets is one thing, so is being financial prudent but you are batting so way above that.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
I have an accountant. He also said given the current climate its important to get a prenuptual agreement.
Click to expand...
Your accountant is not a Cannon Lawyer…if he is, he’d be the first.
SacredHeartBassist said:
You’ve assumed so much about me based on so little. I wouldn’t react poorly at all. It’s just a ukulele. I’d be really sad because it meant a lot to me but if I had a wife that stayed at home and took care of my children, she’d be the most important thing in my life and I’d just be happy she wasn’t hurt.
Click to expand...
But if she decides marriage isn’t working you’d be happy tossing her out on her butt.

Yeah. totally the most important thing in your life.
 
Of course. I enjoyed therapy when I went in the past and it helped me a lot. But I still wouldn’t want to date a woman with mental health issues.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
Of course. I enjoyed therapy when I went in the past and it helped me a lot. But I still wouldn’t want to date a woman with mental health issues.
Click to expand...
Can I reiterate no one is saying you should? Can we move past this.

Then why so much hostility when we suggest working on your trust issues?
 
Xanthippe_Voorhees said:
But if she decides marriage isn’t working you’d be happy tossing her out on her butt.
Click to expand...
Statistically it’s women who initiate divorce proceedings more than men. Also, you’re basing that on nothing. Never said I’d toss her out on her butt if she decides marriage isn’t working.
 
Last edited:
SacredHeartBassist said:
Statistically it’s women who initiate divorce more than men. Also, you’re basing that on nothing.
Click to expand...
Source please. I mean it. I provide links and to sources to most claims I make here, or try to find material backing up my case.

You know what this is all starting to reek of? Anti-feminist nonsense. I should have seen it a mile off.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
40.png
Xanthippe_Voorhees:
But if she decides marriage isn’t working you’d be happy tossing her out on her butt.
Click to expand...
Statistically it’s women who initiate divorce more than men. Also, you’re basing that on nothing.
Click to expand...
Stats aren’t you.

You claim you’d love your wife more than anything, but you would want her to have signed a pre-nup which circumvents modern laws. You are completely blind to what you are actually doing.
 
Not circumvent modern laws. American Law has always protected the freedom of contract which is, in itself, a law.
 
I probably wouldn’t date a woman who described herself as a feminist either. Overwhelming majority of them, excluding the pro-life feminists, are pro pornography, pro abortion, and pro gay marriage. I can get behind a Catherine MacKinnon type though.
 
LittleFlower said:
That is financial abuse.

By saying you have to stay 20 years with me, or I will put you through financial hell—yes abusive. If she argues as much, and lists all the things like “I can’t go into his man cave, or he get’s angry, I can’t touch his musical instrument, etc.” you will find yourself having a very interesting divorce where the prenup goes out the window, like it often does.

And you do need therapy.

What about a woman who would suddenly get mental health issues, like postnatal depression, after children? Is that a grounds for divorce? It would be the mother of your child! Anxiety and depression are not normal after birth, baby blues maybe but not those two which are a completely different type of experience.

Also in a CATHOLIC forum, we are debating divorce and prenups? Pray tell, this is surely a sign you are not ready for marriage.

My husband and I never once talked about that. You will find that many couples here prior to marriage never discussed the dissolution of their love and marriage.
Click to expand...
I think you are unfairly attacking the OP on a subject that was never the topic of this thread. He started a thread about Catholic dating sites and the thread has deteriorated into personal attacks telling the OP he needs therapy and is not ready to marry?
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
Not circumvent modern laws. American Law has always protected the freedom of contract which is, in itself, a law.
Click to expand...
You are literally trying to circumvent laws. Just because you are doing it with the aid of another law doesn’t make it morally right.

I find it very sad that you’d subject a woman to that. I also find it very sad you’d subject yourself to that.

I could never marry someone I did not trust and who did not trust me to make a vow.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top