Deciding to homeschool?

[Jerusha]

Some kids with special needs do well at homeschooling. Particularly autism spectrum disorders, where they need consistency, and do not do well with peer conflicts. A year ago I was talking with a CAF mother who was homeschooling her ASD son, and they had a support network for non-neurotypical homeschoolers. They got together for special activities, and neurotypical homeschoolers also participated. Special education in some districts is a dumping ground, and homeschooling is often the best option. Consultation with local district specialists often works. Otherwise, things like speech therapy, occupational therapy, etc can be managed through hospital resources, if your insurance will pay.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Some kids with special needs do well at homeschooling. Particularly autism spectrum disorders, where they need consistency, and do not do well with peer conflicts. A year ago I was talking with a CAF mother who was homeschooling her ASD son, and they had a support network for non-neurotypical homeschoolers. They got together for special activities, and neurotypical homeschoolers also participated. Special education in some districts is a dumping ground, and homeschooling is often the best option. Consultation with local district specialists often works. Otherwise, things like speech therapy, occupational therapy, etc can be managed through hospital resources, if your insurance will pay.

Some do and some don’t.

I just finished writing about my niece. I homeschooled her for my sister (who must work because she was abandoned by her ex who has no job). She had been in Catholic school PK-3 and had already failed grade 1. The school just kept telling my sister that my niece was a “late bloomer” and “just emotional” because of her father.

I’ve known there’s something odd about that kid since she was 4. I homeschooled her last year and her insurance would pay for “preleminary educational assments”. My sister eventually got the whole shebang. They wouldn’t cover any therepy, though.

This year, I couldn’t homeschool her again. However, the district is WONDERFUL. She’s getting all sorts of help. Insurance wouldn’t pay for anything.

When I talk about my friend with 7 kids, her daughter is not on the spectrum. She has a disorder that means minor to severe delays in motor, communication, etc skills.

Homeschooling can be an option, but what I was addressing was that there are many parents who are DEAD SET on homeschooling or make declarations that homeschooling is the only legitimate parenting option/public school never is that don’t know what they are talking about.

If SPED is a dumping ground, yeah, it’s bad. However, if it’s not, it’s a God-send. And like you said if your insurance will pay. Since Obamacare has been rolled out most people in my income bracket have been forced into expensive PPO or High-deductible plans which don’t pay for squat.

 

[Jerusha]

Homeschooling can be an option, but what I was addressing was that there are many parents who are DEAD SET on homeschooling or make declarations that homeschooling is the only legitimate parenting option/public school never is that don’t know what they are talking about.

Agreed. Every situation is different. I once met with a Mennonite family who sent one of their daughters to public school because of special education needs. She was resisting baptism because then she would be wearing a doily, which would set her apart from the rest of the kids. They were thinking of my crochet doily collection on the walls of my apartment. Special education in this district is good, so home-schooling would not be an option; they were bemoaning the abysmal Amish education system. Hopefully they went to an antique store and let her choose some that were more decorative. Nothing wrong with being different. They have one older single member of their community who dresses like a nun!

 

[Xantippe]

When children are young, depending on your area homeschool can literally be just days of outing and fun with some reading, writing and math lessons.

From what I hear, the early years of homeschooling are not very difficult in terms of pulling together curriculum. It’s around 4th grade that things start getting sticky.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Xanthippe_Voorhees:

When children are young, depending on your area homeschool can literally be just days of outing and fun with some reading, writing and math lessons.

From what I hear, the early years of homeschooling are not very difficult in terms of pulling together curriculum. It’s around 4th grade that things start getting sticky.

Well, I think this is true with all education. Montessori can reasonably be done from age 3 to second grade, 3rd grade if you want to push it. There’s a big developmental leap after age 8. (Ironically, the Catholic age of reason, coincidence much?). In some cultures “real” schooling doesn’t begin until 8/9.

 

[JetteZ]

Shhhh! We’d be starting this endeavor with grade 4!

 

[Entwhistler]

Very true. What school you need to do can get done in a hour or two. And once you get into high school, things start becoming different as well. The child is more independent and can do his school by himself. You just have to set him up. It’s that in-between stage that is hard.

 

[KathleenT]

As a deaf woman…I agree with you.

It took me a while to realize part of my resistance to sending my kids to Catholic school was I never wanted them to associate some of the school experiences with Catholicism.

I was lucky I had a set of parents paying attention and had no issue being difficult. Even so I am fully aware of how many people will exercise petty power over a weaker person if they can get away with it. And these aren’t cartoon villains, these were otherwise “good” people. It is why I always insist it is the small and private decisions that determine your character.

If I had a disable child…I wouldn’t send them to public schools. None of the “resources” are worth it.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Shhhh! We’d be starting this endeavor with grade 4!

No worries!

Honestly, there’s something REALLY fun about that age.

It might seem like “oh no I can’t spend all day traipsing around and doing fun things”

Well, you can still do MANY fun things in 4th grade. However, you are doing some really exciting things. You’ve finally built enough reading skills to read stories that are complex and interesting (learning nuance, meaning, etc) and investigating types of writing–poetry, fiction, biography. You are really starting to write in an interesting way that’s not regurgitation. You are doing math–like fractions and decimals-- that aren’t just basic and makes the world make sense! Money! Baking!

Honestly, the younger grades are EXHAUSTING. Little kids need so much stimulation. I love every moment but there’s something to be said for advanced learning and independence.

 

[Jerusha]

Most college-educated parents can do K-2 fairly easily without pre-packaged programs. Then you need to at least have the state curriculum guidelines at easy access to make sure your kids can easily integrate into a school if something were to happen. like death of a spouse.

 

[Xantippe]

Well, I think this is true with all education. Montessori can reasonably be done from age 3 to second grade, 3rd grade if you want to push it. There’s a big developmental leap after age 8. (Ironically, the Catholic age of reason, coincidence much?). In some cultures “real” schooling doesn’t begin until 8/9.

There’s a major transition around then between learning to read and reading to learn, and it can be pretty jarring.

 

[midori]

I was just talking to a homeschooling mom the other day. She said that people are always asking her what homeschooling is like, because they have this ideal situation in their head. And then when the ideal situation doesn’t play out, they get frustrated and give up.

So her question to them is-- “How do your kids act when you tell them to take a nap? That’s how they’ll act when you homeschool them.” If they are cooperative in one area, they’ll likely be cooperative in homeschooling; if they fight you every inch of the way in one area, they’ll likely fight you in homeschooling. That’s not to say that only docile and cooperative children can successfully homeschool, but it prepares you mentally to not get burned out and frustrated before the end of the first school year, because you can anticipate what to expect, and how to get around it.

 

[Lemuel]

Wow, I will be watching your family on Dr. Phil in another 5 years or so. (And I thought the TV series “Father Knows Best” got cancelled a long time ago . . . (sigh) oh, well.)

We don’t even watch trash TV let alone participate in it. You’ll be watching Dr. Phil for a long, long time if you’re waiting to see me there.

I don’t claim to know what’s best. I know what is moral and right. My kids will decide on their own what is best for them. I teach them how to think, unlike the public schools that teach them what to think.

 

[Lemuel]

Have a good day

I’m having a wonderful day, thank you!

 

[nearlycatholic]

you will never regret being the parent!

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

Wow, I will be watching your family on Dr. Phil in another 5 years or so.

I really wouldnt be wishing this on anybody or taunting them.
Parenting is hard and there are a thousand different variables that go into whether children are successful grown-ups, and type of schooling is only one piece of the puzzle.
Not to mention the things the parent has no control over.
But it’s in society’s best interest to hope and pray for the best possible outcome for our children, not tease and make ugly predictions about other people’s littles.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

FJ2000:

Wow, I will be watching your family on Dr. Phil in another 5 years or so.

I really wouldnt be wishing this on anybody or taunting them.
Parenting is hard and there are a thousand different variables that go into whether children are successful grown-ups, and type of schooling is only one piece of the puzzle.
Not to mention the things the parent has no control over.
But it’s in society’s best interest to hope and pray for the best possible outcome for our children, not tease and make ugly predictions about other people’s littles.

Homeschoolers could do without those in their ranks who have an elitist (quite frankly nearly immoral) level of snobbery and arrogance about homeschooling, especially those who make blanket statements about public schools. It’s funny…I know several active and “retired” public school teachers who homeschooled their children and they ALL have a much more mentally balanced approach to what occurs in public school.

And, in the end, you know what it boils down to? Parents who care. Period. It doesn’t matter if you’re attending the worst school in the US or the best parental involvement is the key indicator of success.

I was at a family gathering where a relative, (who homeschooled his kids) and a friend (whose done all 3 Catholic, public, and homeschool) for her child and is now a teacher was talking about the student profiles and how she found it interesting she could tell which kids came from intact 2-parent families. My older relative spoke up–I’ve taught for 40 years, and I don’t need to look at a student profile to tell you which kids belong to families that care about their education and which ones don’t. Maybe 6 or 7 out of the 200 students I see a day will break that profile for good or for bad, but parents are the biggest influence."

 

[Lemuel]

My statements were not about the quality of education. I don’t think it’s morally right to force someone to pay for services that they neither want nor use. I have no use for public education, yet, I’m forced to subsidize the education of those who do. That’s moral? It’s sick. I have to bear all the expenses of my kids’ education, plus share the cost of those who go to public school. How about let me pay for what I choose to do and you pay for what you choose to do?

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

My statements were not about the quality of education. I don’t think it’s morally right to force someone to pay for services that they neither want nor use. I have no use for public education, yet, I’m forced to subsidize the education of those who do. That’s moral? It’s sick. I have to bear all the expenses of my kids’ education, plus share the cost of those who go to public school. How about let me pay for what I choose to do and you pay for what you choose to do?

Your house isn’t burining so are you happy paying for the fire department? You don’t have someone robbing your home so are you happy paying for the poliece officers? What about the DOT? Do you only want to pay to have your road salted and plowed?

Well, I’m sure for some people the answer is a yes.

You belong to a society. It isn’t about YOU and it isn’t about your kids. EVERYONE shares the cost of education…even the elderly, the young and the infertile. My 70-year-old neighbor never had any kids and she pays for the schools.

Whether you like it or not, every child deserves an education. Even children who don’t have the luxury of a SAHP or for a parent to work part-time. Even children who only have one active parent in their life who needs to work. Even children whose parents cannot fund the level of educational expertise they need. The only way to ensure every child gets an education regardless of parental ability to pay is if all of society pitches in. If you want to go above and beyond, great. Just because you choose not to use that resource, dosn’t mean you can stop paying it. If that was the case then things like the library, the VFW, fire, cops, DPW and others would not be paid for, either. It’s very selfish and short-sighted to demand that you not pay taxes on education just because you’re not using them.

 

[Lemuel]

Your house isn’t burining so are you happy paying for the fire department?

Yep. And I live in an area where you pay for the service if you want it. If you don’t, they would watch your house burn down and protect the neighbors who did pay for the service. It works beautifully.

You don’t have someone robbing your home so are you happy paying for the poliece officers?

The cops live too far away from here. I’d be better off shooting now and explaining later.

What about the DOT? Do you only want to pay to have your road salted and plowed?

Yep.

EVERYONE shares the cost of education…even the elderly, the young and the infertile.

I pay the entire cost of my kid’s education. How is that sharing?

The only way to ensure every child gets an education regardless of parental ability to pay is if all of society pitches in.

Really? The only way? Did you learn that from public education? And who decides that every child gets an education?

Just because you choose not to use that resource, dosn’t mean you can stop paying it.

So I guess I can’t complain about having to pay for abortions and birth control either, can I?

It’s very selfish and short-sighted to demand that you not pay taxes on education just because you’re not using them.

So how much of my money are you entitled to and why?