Fed up with phony confirmations

[ProVobis]

Do only a few Churches add extra Masses at Christmas and Easter or do many of them add extra Masses at Christmas and Easter?

Define “few” and “many.” In numbers or percentages, perhaps?

Don’t really understand your point though. The bishops and priests already know these statistics. These numbers and money contributed are even reported in bulletins and in sermons. I don’t feel it’s my job to count heads while I’m supposed to be praying. But I know when it’s hard for me TO pray.

 

[zab]

I can’t tell you how fed up I am with the great majority of “in-name-only”, hatch-match-dispatch catholics who come in for christening marriage and funerals and you never see them otherwise. …

Meanwhile the true Catholics who attend week in and week out with a reverent heart and spirit are distracted from their worship and the sacredness of the mass is spoiled by this great influx. …

Lord, I thank you that I am not like all of those other lazy Catholics. I come to church not only on Sundays but week days as well and I participate in the sacraments and pray my rosary. And I tithe to the church. Give me patience and give it to me now!

 

[Phemie]

My daughter was part of the “experiment” that the church was doing 17 years ago in Sacramento and her whole class was confirmed in 3rd grade! I was livid. During the parent meeting we had with the Sister of Mercy who was in charge of faith formation in our diocese, there was almost a riot - I wasn’t the only parent who was shocked and dismayed about confirmation at age 8 or 9. The kids were to young to understand the majority of the tenants of our faith let alone do any meaningful community service and making decisions as a young adult. My dear daughter was quite happy to have a pretty new dress, flowers in her hair and a cake at her party. What a joke! The next year the experiment ended and the tradition of doing Confirmation in 8th grade returned. I teach high school and I can tell you that even most 14 year olds aren’t ready to be considered adults in the eyes of the Church. Hopefully someday Rome will realize this and find a fitting solution.

Your own personal theology of this sacrament doesn’t match that of the Church. Unlike Communion, in the Latin rite, there is absolutely no need to understand or even be conscious of anything to be confirmed. That’s why infants are confirmed if they are in danger of dying but they cannot be given Communion.

For decades Confirmation was around the ages of 7 or 8 (I was 7 when I was confirmed back in 1961) then came the late 60s and the dropping away of kids in religious education and suddenly Confirmation started to be pushed back, first to the age of 10 or 12 and now even the last year of high school. It was said, not implied, that this was to keep the kids in religious education for as long as possible. This flies in the face of the young person’s need for the graces imparted by Confirmation to face the challenges that come with adolescence. They shouldn’t have to jump through hoops to receive a sacrament which the Church says they must receive to be fully initiated. What does compulsory volunteerism (what an oxymoron) accomplish?

For 9 years our former diocese had Confirmation and First Communion together in the same celebration from the age of 7. I had occasion to be a catechist for that process while also attending the preparation of the older children as the parent of a 15 year old preparing for his own confirmation because we’d moved a lot and he had missed it where we’d lived before. As a catechist, I would have vouched that most of the children in the Confirmation/First Communion group came to those sacraments with the right attitude while that was far from the case for the teens who, for the most part didn’t want to be there and were only there to get mom/dad off their backs.

Unfortunately, when our diocese was suppressed and a new diocese established combining ours with another one that confirmed in grade 11, the new diocese established that Confirmation would take place any time between grade 6 - 10. I think we were the losers in that decision.

 

[Nicea325]

I can’t tell you how fed up I am with the great majority of “in-name-only”, hatch-match-dispatch catholics who come in for christening marriage and funerals and you never see them otherwise.
Of particular distaste to me is the confirmations that come in as a routine from the local catholic schools. These people never come to church any other week of the year but when little jonny or jenny is getting confirmed they all arrive with cameras popping. The little dears parade in their suits and white dresses looking like debutantes all sparkled up with cubic zirconia necklaces. They all bring a vast array of family and friends many of whom exhibit little knowledge or respect for the church or its liturgy. The vast majority of all these people go up for the sacrament. Who are all these people? Where have they all come from? The whole mass becomes a circus. The car park is full and everyone thinks look how many people are going to church. But they aren’t. They’re not going to church. They are going to a family event.

Meanwhile the true Catholics who attend week in and week out with a reverent heart and spirit are distracted from their worship and the sacredness of the mass is spoiled by this great influx. What is of particular distaste to me is that this charade turns the confirmation into a kind of social rite, no different to a debutante. When there is a true confirmation being said with a family and young person who attend faithfully every week you find your joy is robbed because you are forever seeing these sham events.

I’m not sure what the solution is, but one remedy might be to go back to the old idea of the Mass of the Faithful and the Mass of the Catechumens. Let’s make it quite clear that the mass is for the “Faithful” and that unfaithful people should not be there. And if the mass is only for the faithful then the other sacred sacraments also are only available for the faithful.

I know that is not the rule of the church today but this approach might restore holiness to the mass. Vatican II and Pope John Paul II repeatedly called for holiness in the “universall call to holiness”. Holiness must start in each Catholic, then Catholic’s assembled together at mass so that our masses are as holy as they might possibly be. The mass is an offering to God, it should be a holy offering from a holy people. Numbers are not so important. With ever more sacred and holy masses being offered each week then holiness shall begin to reach into the world like light reaching into the darkness.

Confirmation is a sacred sacrament, not a social rite of passage. We really need to get back to basics.

Precisely why I do not favor confirmations for teenagers. The approach seems to "Protestant’ to me in nature. One has to decide he or she is ready to receive and follow Jesus. Are people capable of making a such sound decision? Yes! But teenagers? Come on…expecting a 16 year old? As a Director of Catechesis, the majority of my youth confirmandi are preparing for he sacrament because of mom or dad or some relative. I was baptized and confirmed as an infant,yet people always tell me: Yeah but do you remember it? I did not know ‘remembering’ my confirmation was more vital then the actual affects of the sacrament? My rebuttal: Do you remember your infant baptism?

I do not recall Joseph and Mary postponing circumcision for Jesus,because he needed to ‘remember’ it?

Go back to original order: baptism,confirmation and eucharist.

 

[Nicea325]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kozlosap
My daughter was part of the “experiment” that the church was doing 17 years ago in Sacramento and her whole class was confirmed in 3rd grade! I was livid. During the parent meeting we had with the Sister of Mercy who was in charge of faith formation in our diocese, there was almost a riot - I wasn’t the only parent who was shocked and dismayed about confirmation at age 8 or 9. The kids were to young to understand the majority of the tenants of our faith let alone do any meaningful community service and making decisions as a young adult. My dear daughter was quite happy to have a pretty new dress, flowers in her hair and a cake at her party. What a joke! The next year the experiment ended and the tradition of doing Confirmation in 8th grade returned. I teach high school and I can tell you that even most 14 year olds aren’t ready to be considered adults in the eyes of the Church. Hopefully someday Rome will realize this and find a fitting solution.

And were any of those parents livid about their child not understanding the major tenants of infant baptism? Sorry,but teenage confrmations are a bust and failure!

 

[Oneofthewomen]

I received this from a friend of mine in an e-mail this morning.
I do not disagree with much of what has been said regarding the lack of understanding of the Sacraments and the poor cathechesis that has been prevelant the past 50 years. However, I believe that we need to remember that we need to help people see the error of their ways with love and charity and not condemnation. This story is a wonderful reminder of that!

Peace!

His name is Bill. He has wild hair, wears a T-shirt with holes in it,jeans, and no shoes.
This was literally his wardrobe for his entire
four years of college. He is brilliant. Kind of profound and very, very bright. He became a Christian while attending college.

Across the street from the campus is a well-dressed, very conservative church. They want to develop a ministry to the students but are not sure how to go about it. One day Bill decides to go there. He walks in with no shoes, jeans, hisT-shirt, and wild hair. The service has already started and so Bill starts down the aisle looking for a seat.

The church is completely packed and he can’t find a seat. By now, people are really looking a bit uncomfortable, but no one says anything. Bill gets closer and closer and closer to the pulpit, and when he realizes there are no seats, he just squats down right on the carpet.

By now the people are really uptight, and the tension in the air is thick

About this time, the minister realizes that from way at the back of the church, a deacon is slowly making his way toward Bill. Now the deacon is in his eighties, has silver-gray hair, and a three-piece suit… A godly man, very elegant, very dignified, very courtly. He walks with a cane and, as he starts walking toward this boy, everyone is saying to themselves that you can’t blame him for what
he’s going to do.

How can you expect a man of his age and of his background to understand some college kid on the floor?

It takes a long time for the man to reach the boy. The church is utterly silent except for the clicking of the man’s cane. All eyes are focused on him… You can’t even hear anyone breathing. The minister can’t even preach the sermon until the deacon does what he has to do.

And now they see this elderly man drop his cane on the floor. With great difficulty, he lowers himself and sits down next to Bill and worships with him so he won’t be alone.

Everyone chokes up with emotion.
When the minister gains control, he says,
‘What I’m about to preach, you will never remember. What you have just seen, you will never forget.’

‘Be careful how you live. You may be the only Bible some people will ever read!’

 

[Cat]

I agree that there is no such thing as a “phony confirmation.” (Title of thread). It is the Lord who confirms. We merely present ourselves.

But I agree that there are those who have no clue and have no intention of ever following through with their Confirmation. (Same thing happens in Protestant churches when teenagers and children are baptized.)

I think what’s probably needed–and I believe the OP mentioned this, and others, too, in this thread–is a better “program” of catechesis for Catholics AFTER Confirmation.

My husband and I were confirmed as adults, and for one year after the Confirmation, we were part of the Mystagogy (I hope I’m spelling that correctly), in which we were considered “new Catholics” (which we were) and we were given extra teaching and attention by our RCIA teachers and also by the priests.

I can honestly say that out of our RCIA class of nearly 30 people, almost all of them are still involved with the Church. We see them at Mass and we see them involved in various ministries in the Church.

So obviously the period of Mystagogy worked in our parish at least for our class.

I think with teenagers, even more catechesis is necessary. So many families (50% national average) end up broken, so we really can’t count on families to teach and train their children in the faith anymore (sad). Godparents are often recruited mainly out of custom, and often are not equipped to take on the spiritual and religious education of a teenager when the parents fail to do the job.

I just received our diocescan newspaper, and I was interested to see four “issues” that the diocese is going to work on in the coming year. One of those four issues is "Youth Ministry.

Now I know that some of you scoff at this, and I don’t blame you for scoffing IF the “youth ministry” is nothing more than a schedule of various socials and good times. That’s a waste of time and money. But good youth ministry is much more than just socials (and socials are necessary for youth). In a good youth ministry, the young people are taught and trained in the essentials and in the deeper things of the Church.

I think that this would go a long way towards helping young people to internalize their Confirmation and come to a full, mature understanding of what it means to be a Catholic.

So my suggestion to the OP and to others who are concerned about “phony confirmations” is to get involved somehow with your parish Youth Ministry. If you can’t work with teens, then perhaps there is something you can do to facilitate the work of the youth workers (e.g., give money, make food, etc.) Youth ministry might help teenagers to stop being CIO Catholics (Christmas, Easter, Obligation).

 

[jtodisco]

Lord, I thank you that I am not like all of those other lazy Catholics. I come to church not only on Sundays but week days as well and I participate in the sacraments and pray my rosary. And I tithe to the church. Give me patience and give it to me now!

I realize that sometimes it can be tricky when trying to convey sarcasm online, but I truly hope that was meant to be a sarcastic reference to the parable of the pharisee and the tax collector. If it was, well done. If not, then I think you really need to re-read that parable (Luke 18.9-14).

 

[CDNowak]

**I’m not that theologically astute to agree or disagree with what you say. **

Let’s agree to disagree then. Unless you provide sound theological basis for your arguments concerning when confirmation should be made/received, we will be getting nowhere.

Sorry, I thought you wanted to avoid the theological aspect.

Let’s start with the basics: What is a sacrament? What is the Sacrament of Confirmation?

A Sacrament is an outward sign, instituted by Christ, which confers Sanctifying Grace, that is God’s Divine Life, on our souls. This grace aids us in avoiding sin and choosing good.

The Sacrament of Confirmation, as one of the Sacraments of Initiation (Traditionally second), established the foundations of the Christian life. In particular Confirmation “is necessary for the completion of baptismal grace.”(CCC 1285)

The Catechism goes on to say (1303): "From this fact, Confirmation brings an increase and deepening of baptismal grace:

• it roots us more deeply in the divine filiation which makes us cry, “Abba! Father!”;117
• it unites us more firmly to Christ;
• it increases the gifts of the Holy Spirit in us;
• it renders our bond with the Church more perfect;118
• it gives us a special strength of the Holy Spirit to spread and defend the faith by word and action as true witnesses of Christ, to confess the name of Christ boldly, and never to be ashamed of the Cross…"

Further, while the East has maintained the original close connection between the Sacraments of initiation this has been lost in the West (originally be the delaying of Communion, then when that was decisively corrected by Quam Singulari, by the postponement of Confirmation), the Church has asked the Latin Rite to keep in mind that the Eucharist is the goal of Christian Initiation, and the pastoral practice should be modified to reflect that.

 

[Julianna]

Cat…you are definately on to somethng there.

I taught confirmation candidates for 3 yrs. Most of the 30 I had were in 7-9th grade. It is true, they disappear after Confirmation…because there is nothing left…

In the Protestant churches…Baptist…for one…there are Sunday School classes for “every” age group and others…such as 'young singles"…“young marrieds”…“newly engaged”…“married with young kids”…“empty nesters”…“seniors”…and “youth ministry”.

And there is a packed house every Sunday…the “youth” is on Sunday nights…as I recall.

Growing up Catholic…I do remember everyone dropping out of any sort of continuing Catholic Education…and yes…perhaps that it why I myself don’t understand or know alot about my faith. I made my Confirmation at age 25. I didn’t make it in grade 7 because my dad…for whatever reason…didn’t seem to care…no matter how much my Baptist mother begged him to take me to class…which was held after Mass on Sunday.

When I taught the class…I did ask "How many of you here are here because your parents “made” you come? Over half raised their hands. I could not get one parent to help me with “lock ins” and other community volunteer projects we were doing. They would drop these kids off…and that was it.

If they made their Confirmation any earlier…it would have been worse…you would never see them again.

I have often wondered…even going back and forth to my moms church and dads church…that dads stopped Sunday School after Confirmation…and in moms Church, you just moved to a different group and the education continued.

In our Diocese we moved Catechism classes to Wednesday evenings because all the Protestant Churches in town had their youth groups on Wednesday and adult prayer services on Wednesday nights. When I was in high school living in the south…I cannot tell you how many times I was “invited” to a youth group either at the Baptist Church or the Pentacostal Church by kids in the high school. No one ever approached me about going to the Catholic Church. (I had just moved south in my senior year). When I told them I was Catholic…they would introduce me to someone they knew that was Catholic…who really didn’t tell me anything but the name of the Church in town…and I did ask (knowing the answer already) if there was a Catholic youth group…and she looked at me funny. (1975)

So basically, yeah, the sacraments have become a right of passage…and a get out catechism free ticket. On college campuses, there are oodles of Baptist and evangelical youth groups. When I was in college…I don’t recall a Catholic one. Why is that?

I have always wondered.

 

[ProVobis]

I emailed a master-degreed theologian earlier today and here is her response:

“Confirmation should not be administered when the baby is baptised. Confirmation is unique to Catholicism, Lutheranism, Anglicans, Orthodox, Eastern rites, Methodists. It is a sign of reaching adulthood in religious decision making–signifyng reaching full communion in the body of the church. Eastern Orthodox does baptism, communion and confirmation all at the same time. They do that so that the child is considered a full member of the body when they are babies.”

 

[Cat]

Cat…you are definately on to somethng there.

I taught confirmation candidates for 3 yrs. Most of the 30 I had were in 7-9th grade. It is true, they disappear after Confirmation…because there is nothing left…

In the Protestant churches…Baptist…for one…there are Sunday School classes for “every” age group and others…such as 'young singles"…“young marrieds”…“newly engaged”…“married with young kids”…“empty nesters”…“seniors”…and “youth ministry”.

And there is a packed house every Sunday…the “youth” is on Sunday nights…as I recall.

Growing up Catholic…I do remember everyone dropping out of any sort of continuing Catholic Education…and yes…perhaps that it why I myself don’t understand or know alot about my faith. I made my Confirmation at age 25. I didn’t make it in grade 7 because my dad…for whatever reason…didn’t seem to care…no matter how much my Baptist mother begged him to take me to class…which was held after Mass on Sunday.

When I taught the class…I did ask "How many of you here are here because your parents “made” you come? Over half raised their hands. I could not get one parent to help me with “lock ins” and other community volunteer projects we were doing. They would drop these kids off…and that was it.

If they made their Confirmation any earlier…it would have been worse…you would never see them again.

I have often wondered…even going back and forth to my moms church and dads church…that dads stopped Sunday School after Confirmation…and in moms Church, you just moved to a different group and the education continued.

In our Diocese we moved Catechism classes to Wednesday evenings because all the Protestant Churches in town had their youth groups on Wednesday and adult prayer services on Wednesday nights. When I was in high school living in the south…I cannot tell you how many times I was “invited” to a youth group either at the Baptist Church or the Pentacostal Church by kids in the high school. No one ever approached me about going to the Catholic Church. (I had just moved south in my senior year). When I told them I was Catholic…they would introduce me to someone they knew that was Catholic…who really didn’t tell me anything but the name of the Church in town…and I did ask (knowing the answer already) if there was a Catholic youth group…and she looked at me funny. (1975)

So basically, yeah, the sacraments have become a right of passage…and a get out catechism free ticket. On college campuses, there are oodles of Baptist and evangelical youth groups. When I was in college…I don’t recall a Catholic one. Why is that?

I have always wondered.

I’m glad that our diocese considers “Youth Ministry” a priority and pray that we will see improvements in the drop-out rate.

We actually had a pretty decent Catholic group on our college campus (NIU) back in the 1970s. The Newman Center was pastored by a good priest way back then, and it still is. I’ve heard the Newman Center priest speak and he’s awesome.

I wonder if perhaps many of the Catholic kids are celebrating their liberation from their parents and “church stuff” by drinking (alcohol) on the weekends while the tee-totalling evangelical Protestants are meeting for Bible study and prayer and fellowship on Friday nights (that’s when our Campus Crusade for Christ meetings were held).

Yes, I realize that it’s a generalization. But at my daughter’s Catholic college, in her first week of classes, seventeen under-aged drinking parties were busted by the cops. That’s tragic, IMO.

I’m guessing it’s just part of the culture of Catholic youth–college is about drinking, not religion. Is that something that could be catechized out of the kids? I was friends with quite a few evangelical Christians in college, and none of them drank alcohol, ever. It’s probably changed now, though.

 

[NewEnglandPriest]

"Confirmation should not be administered when the baby is baptised.

True, insofar as that’s not the norm in the Latin Church.

[Confirmation] is a sign of reaching adulthood in religious decision making–signifyng reaching full communion in the body of the church.

This part of the answer, however, is completely, utterly and 100% incorrect.

 

[graceandglory]

Of particular distaste to me is the confirmations that come in as a routine from the local catholic schools. These people never come to church any other week of the year but when little jonny or jenny is getting confirmed they all arrive with cameras popping.

Confirmation is a sacred sacrament, not a social rite of passage. We really need to get back to basics.

I have to be honest…I don’t like it either. I wanted my sons to receive the grace of the sacrament. Same with my daughter’s first communion. The whole show was really a show. I wanted them to talk more about Jesus, but it was all about the dress. And the pictures… I was raised Catholic in the bare bones 70s, and never had a first communion dress. I think they are fine, but what’s with the professional photographer? Is it just a sign of the times, or is it a sign of something more?

I went through 4 sacraments this year kind of glassy eyed, going through the motions of the show, while I had a difficult time connecting the frou frou to the sacrament. We only had a few people come, just confirmation sponsors and Godparents. Certainly not the high falutin’ stuff that other families did. We were the weird ones out, I guess.

Sorry about my rant.

 

[Phemie]

I emailed a master-degreed theologian earlier today and here is her response:

“Confirmation should not be administered when the baby is baptised. Confirmation is unique to Catholicism, Lutheranism, Anglicans, Orthodox, Eastern rites, Methodists. It is a sign of reaching adulthood in religious decision making–signifyng reaching full communion in the body of the church. Eastern Orthodox does baptism, communion and confirmation all at the same time. They do that so that the child is considered a full member of the body when they are babies.”

One should remember that for the purpose of initiation the Church calls an adult anyone over the age of reason, so anyone from about 7 and up. Below that, they are known as infants.

Canon Law says that Confirmation is generally to be administered at the age of reason but allows bishops to set another age for their own diocese. That explains why some cultures in the Latin Rite confirm in infancy while others confirm in high school.

 

[graceandglory]

I taught confirmation candidates for 3 yrs. Most of the 30 I had were in 7-9th grade. It is true, they disappear after Confirmation…because there is nothing left…
.

Why the heck is that???
That’s when the protestant groups are just revving up!
My Catholic parish lost me to the protestant youth groups after Confirmation, and that is who got to reap the fruit that was sown in my Catholic upbringing. My heart wanted to minister to Catholics, but there was nothing.
Same deal now, there is no place to plug in at my parish, but if I wanted to tomorrow, I could go to the neighborhood christian church and start a women’s bible study.

My kids are now involved as active convert Catholic kids who just got confirmed, but there’s nothing going on in the Catholic youth group this summer; they will go with their friends to the protestant programs and camps.

You can’t imagine how that grieves me, to hear my own kids saying the same exact things I did when i was their age.

 

[Phemie]

Same deal now, there is no place to plug in at my parish, but if I wanted to tomorrow, I could go to the neighborhood christian church and start a women’s bible study.

What’s stopping you from doing that in your own parish? Parishes are always looking for people to do stuff like that but it seems that everyone expects the pastor to do it all.

My kids are now involved as active convert Catholic kids who just got confirmed, but there’s nothing going on in the Catholic youth group this summer; they will go with their friends to the protestant programs and camps.

Camps & programs cost money and if your parish is like mine it’s barely making ends meet. Catholics probably give the least of any denomination from what I can see when I count the collection every week. We can’t fix our church but the Pentecostals down the road can afford a brand spanking new one with all the tech stuff they need. Why? Because they tithe. Catholic DINKs throw in a fiver and think they’re being generous.

You can’t imagine how that grieves me, to hear my own kids saying the same exact things I did when i was their age.

How about starting something for them?

 

[excubitor]

The best place for apostates, heretics, schismatics, and unbelievers from the pagan world is at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, where they can face Jesus Truly Present in the Blessed Sacrament, hear His Word proclaimed, and be with believers who are faithful to the Church.

Its when facing such appalling ignorance as this that I pray urgently for a return to the custom of the early church which had a mass of the catechumens and a mass of the faithful. In that church only the faithful who were absolved of all mortal sin and had fulfilled their penance could even attend the mass of the faithful, let alone partake of the sacrament. These people understood what holiness was. They understood the gravity and horror of sin and apostasy.

In the early church the Eucharist procession was an acceptable way bring out our Lord for the gaze of the world. However the mysteries of the consecration were holy things which were reserved for the holy people of God.

Sadly there are Catholics rocking up for the Eucharist who don’t believe the doctrines of the church, are disobedient of the magisterium, who are practicing birth control, who are in a state of mortal sin and who hardly ever come to church who are with profound ignorance committing sacrilege when they eat and drink from the sacrament. They even bring their apostate and pagan friends along with them to commit sacrilege together and then afterwards they go off to the party to celebrate.

If the post from cat here is anything to go by then it is going to take a huge shakeup of the church to restore even the barest minimum of even the most rudimentarty concepts of the Catholic faith. Wave after wave of sacrilege pounding upon the shores of the church year in year out, year out, decade in, decade out. Stripping the church of her holiness. We have got to the point now where the church is standing naked and exposed in rudeness and shame. Yet her people do not recognise her wretchedness or their own impiety. They think that they are being inclusive of other races and religions and in fact all they are being is profane.

I don’t actually believe in the Great Chastisement, but when I have seen the incredible ignorance of the faith, the utter and most disgraceful permissiveness then I pray for it, for what other calamity will restore faithfulness and holiness to this church which I love, which in principle is Holy but in practice is wretched.

Rev 3:17 Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked: 18 I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see. 19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.

 

[colliric]

Battleaxe:

Sometimes, we have good reasons for judging.

But this is a flawed statement, because this is a statement that does not excuse that fact that the act of judgement can be evil despite whatever good reasoning was given. The reason can be relativly good, but the judgement itself may be universally evil. Thats why that is a flawed sentiment.

 

[excubitor]

I think a lot of it has to do with the schools usurping the parents’ job as primary catechists. For decades it was understood that everyone in grade 2 would go to Confession for the first time and then receive Communion. That made it a cultural rite of passage as much as a sacrament and for many the desire for this rite of passage is still strong while the importance of the sacrament has fallen by the wayside.
.

Could not agree more. This would be my other rule to implement.
Forbid schools to organise confirmations.
This would force parents to take the inititiative (or the children themselves) which is how it should be. This would in one fell swoop get rid of the vast majority of contrived and phony confirmations for the simple reason that the apostate Catholics would never get around to even thinking about having their children confirmed.

Fathers are the worst. The kids parade in with their schoolmates in their white suits and dresses and Dad could not look more bored if he tried. He can’t wait to get out of there and go back to the game on TV. Kind of like me at one of those kids music concerts where you are dead bored, hate every minute of it and just make sure that you smile and clap at the right times to make your kid look like you are involved and interested.

So the confirmation just becomes a tired extension of little Johnny’s educamacation that you fit in between P&T meetings and the school concert.