Has anyone here been excluded form their Children's Mormon Temple Wedding?

[why_me]

And if someone presents themselves for communion it’s doubtful they’d be denied. Catholics after all don’t have a “communion recommend” they have to show to receive.

If the priest knows that the person standing in line is a protestant or a mormon, he or she will be denied communion. It is the priest’s obligation to deny the communion to non-catholics.

However in some countries the non-catholic can stand in line and receive a blessing from the priest if the person puts his or her right arm over the heart with hand touching the shoulder. But no communion.

 

[why_me]

The LDS church says that is a simple solution; it is not. You don’t know the pain until it happens to you. For a church that says it is all about family, they are falling miserably short when it comes to weddings. I think the couple should be required to have a chapel wedding so all family members can attend and THEN they can have the required temple wedding. Now THAT would be all about family:thumbsup:

Annie

I agree and I have posted such a statement. But the rules are the rules but these rules can easily be solved through an exchanging of the ring ceremony at some future date.

Also, there may be another reason for not allowing non-members or unworthy members into the temple at this moment. It is called youtube. The antimormons would love to youtube a temple wedding ceremony or for that matter any ceremony in the temple.

 

[why_me]

I was Mormon so I do know a bit about the ceremony and who can and cannot attend. I also know that the reception for those who could not attend the wedding is not even going to come close to the joy of seeing my only child - my best friend - get married. However, it is one moment in her life out of many that I will not be a part of, so I will try not to let it get to me. I just never really thought it would come to this…

Annie

When you first came into the forum, you seemed to imply that you were an active mormon.You wrote from a mormon perspective. What happened? Now you write in the past tense when you refer to your mormonism. Did I misunderstand something?

 

[ibkc]

When you first came into the forum, you seemed to imply that you were an active mormon.You wrote from a mormon perspective. What happened? Now you write in the past tense when you refer to your mormonism. Did I misunderstand something?

AnnieB announced a while back that she was returning to the Catholic Church, and there was a long thread where many regulars here posted their congratulations and support.

Annie, if you are still reading this - I am sorry your thread got derailed. I think if you reposted your thread in the “Family Life” forum, you’d get the more supportive responses you need. I know there are regulars on that part of the forum who have Mormon friends and relatives, and the threads there don’t generally turn into arguments like they do here.

 

[mercygate]

I have been following this thread with interest. Seems to me that if you do not believe as Mormons do, then you just have to accept that they play by a set of rules that **you **reject.

I don’t see the Mormon Temple wedding as being about “family” or “inclusion” but about religious conviction.

Somebody has a club you don’t want to join, and they have a rule that you can’t come in for their activities. If they use the word “worthy” for those who can come in, how does that make someone who does not wish to come in “unworthy”? How can you allow yourself to feel rejected?

Being a parent means having a thick skin sometimes, if you want to retain any kind of relationship with your kids. It often means not indulging in feelings of hurt, rejection, or being slighted or disrespected when things don’t go your way.

Heck, before I was Catholic, I never once questioned the policy of allowing only Catholics to receive the Eucharist. If somebody wanted to receive it bad enough, they would become Catholic. If they didn’t want to become Catholic, they have no business whining about the way Catholics run the house.

 

[zaffiroborant]

Let me put it this way: for worthy catholics receiving the communion is the hallmark of the Mass and it is the main reason for attending. However, if all members of the family are catholic except the father or mother and they need to sit it out in the pew, it may be just a little unsettling to the person excluded from communion. I see no difference. Exclusion is exclusion.

Except they are usually not the person excluded I always see people who remain in the pews. And since Mass is celebrated daily the person could become Catholic and participate, unlike your child’s wedding which is a once in a lifetime event (hopefuly anyway). So I see very little similarity.

 

[AMDGtoo]

Somebody has a club…

Except this isn’t about a club. It’s about an important life event of ones child (who may or may not know that his/her parents are going to be excluded on one of the most important days of their lives), and the exclusion is by an organization that claims to be all about family and that says that it is Christian–not a cult or club.

 

[mercygate]

Except this isn’t about a club. It’s about an important life event of ones child (who may or may not know that his/her parents are going to be excluded on one of the most important days of their lives), and the exclusion is by an organization that claims to be all about family and that says that it is Christian–not a cult or club.

Anybody marrying in a temple ceremony knows who can and cannot attend.

 

[AMDGtoo]

Anybody marrying in a temple ceremony knows who can and cannot attend.

Perhaps on the day of the temple ceremony. But I have spoken to folks (and not just my own daughter) where I had to wonder just how far in advance that realization was made known.

 

[RebeccaJ]

Perhaps on the day of the temple ceremony. But I have spoken to folks (and not just my own daughter) where I had to wonder just how far in advance that realization was made known.

I know of one instance where a woman became a Mormon in the 6 lesson time frame in order to marry a Mormon man in a Mormon temple. It wasn’t until they were making the wedding plans that it came to light that her father could not attend. She left the guy and the Mormon church over it all.

 

[Annie_B]

I have been following this thread with interest. Seems to me that if you do not believe as Mormons do, then you just have to accept that they play by a set of rules that **you **reject.

I don’t see the Mormon Temple wedding as being about “family” or “inclusion” but about religious conviction.

Somebody has a club you don’t want to join, and they have a rule that you can’t come in for their activities. If they use the word “worthy” for those who can come in, how does that make someone who does not wish to come in “unworthy”? How can you allow yourself to feel rejected?

Being a parent means having a thick skin sometimes, if you want to retain any kind of relationship with your kids. It often means not indulging in feelings of hurt, rejection, or being slighted or disrespected when things don’t go your way.

Heck, before I was Catholic, I never once questioned the policy of allowing only Catholics to receive the Eucharist. If somebody wanted to receive it bad enough, they would become Catholic. If they didn’t want to become Catholic, they have no business whining about the way Catholics run the house.

Please don’t tell me about needing to be thick skinned…I raised my daughter - by myself - after my first husband killed himself in our home on Mother’s Day weekend 1992. They had to use hazmat suits to clean him up. This is not about things going “my way”. If you had any sense of compassion, you would know that.

Annie

 

[Annie_B]

AnnieB announced a while back that she was returning to the Catholic Church, and there was a long thread where many regulars here posted their congratulations and support.

Annie, if you are still reading this - I am sorry your thread got derailed. I think if you reposted your thread in the “Family Life” forum, you’d get the more supportive responses you need. I know there are regulars on that part of the forum who have Mormon friends and relatives, and the threads there don’t generally turn into arguments like they do here.

Thank you

Annie

 

[Annie_B]

When you first came into the forum, you seemed to imply that you were an active mormon.You wrote from a mormon perspective. What happened? Now you write in the past tense when you refer to your mormonism. Did I misunderstand something?

I returned to the Catholic Church:thumbsup: However, it was before my daughter got engaged.

Annie

 

[emeraldcoast]

Annie,

Did you raise your daughter in the Mormon Church?

God Bless!

 

[puzzleannie]

I believe the point of the thread is about the parents, who did NOT “join the club” and therefore did not “agree to the rules” when their children did, and the poster is asking about the reaction of those parents, not about the (presumably Mormon in good standing) children themselves in the bridal party. So that argument contributes nothing to the discussion, neither to digressions about practice of other religions. now back to our regularly scheduled topic

 

[Geocacher]

Excluded from my Sister’s temple wedding, My Dad’s second marriage in the temple(after my first Mom died), and my nieces, and nephews. Have not be able to enter any temple after 1980, but with my Dad’s temple marriage, I was able to sit in a side room, between the recommed desk, and the front door. The Orlando Florida Temple, the Desk is placed back from the front door, with a good sized waiting room to the side.

I fell from the LDS church after these problems, and my inability to get a recommend since 1980. Not attending any church now, but it was hard not being able to attend the weddings.

I was able to go to the Detroit reception of my sister, since I could not go to Orlando Florida, to the wedding or reception down there.

 

[Annie_B]

Annie,

Did you raise your daughter in the Mormon Church?

God Bless!

I “exposed” her to it, but I was not a member when she joined. When she graduated high school she was allowed to choose her direction…

Annie

 

[Annie_B]

I believe the point of the thread is about the parents, who did NOT “join the club” and therefore did not “agree to the rules” when their children did, and the poster is asking about the reaction of those parents, not about the (presumably Mormon in good standing) children themselves in the bridal party. So that argument contributes nothing to the discussion, neither to digressions about practice of other religions. now back to our regularly scheduled topic

Thank you

Annie

 

[mercygate]

Please don’t tell me about needing to be thick skinned…I raised my daughter - by myself - after my first husband killed himself in our home on Mother’s Day weekend 1992. They had to use hazmat suits to clean him up. This is not about things going “my way”. If you had any sense of compassion, you would know that.

Annie

Excuse me? How could anybody here know what you have been through?

 

[ralphinal]

I have not been on either side of this issue, but I would like to raise another side.

Let’s say that you have a child who wants to be married by a shinto priest in a traditional ceremony in a Japanese temple. Now, as a Catholic, or even a Christian, you object to it. WHen push comes to shove, you decide that, as a point you will not attend. Will your child be hurt? Yes. Will this cause damage to the relationship? Yes. Can the burned bridges be rebuilt? Yes, but it does not always happen.

Now, same thing, but you decide to go, so as not to upset the relationship. Are you doing something that is against your consceince and faith? Yes. It is a sin? Probably. Is it the easy way? Yes.

This is different from the situation presented. You have the option of going or not going. The OP’s situation is one where someone else is telling you that you are not worthy. I would find offense at that.

Now, is it possible that these people did not know until it is too late? Yes. It may not be intentional, but sometimes people do not know all of the information when they commit.

My prayers for all the families involved.