Homophobic reaction to the abuse crisis discouraging me - what should I do?

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At least we are talking about the elephant in the room: RCC teaches that homosexuality Is disordered and yet a disproportionate share of priests are homosexual. That in itself is not the problem. The problem is the secrecy and evil of abuse of power and position to harm the vulnerable. Two different issues that intersect a bit.

On this issue I think we need to hear more from the church on the dignity of every person, especially SSA. Lift it as a heavy cross and source of sanctity for those who have it. Maybe even try to disentangle “disordered” from sinful.
 
Shakuhachi said:
Maybe even try to disentangle “disordered” from sinful.
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I wouldn’t hold my breath on this one. As difficult as the word “disordered” is, this is the basis for the Catholic position. I can’t think of another substitute that would be any less difficult.
 
I’m sorry you’re going through this. We are ALL sinners. We ALL belong in the church
 
I also like Catholicnewsagency.com .

There tends to be significantly less spin there than in their sister publication National Catholic Register, but they cover more US related church news.
 
catholic1seeks said:
Hey all.

I don’t really care if you disagree that there is a prominent homophobic reaction in Catholic circles to the abuse scandals.

I’m not asking whether you think so or not.

Either you recognize it, or you don’t.

I think so. And as a Catholic with SSA, it’s very discouraging. I feel pushed aside. I probably need to stop visiting NewAdvent.org, for starters. But I hear it everywhere now, EWTN radio, typical Catholic news sources, etc.

What do I do?
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While I cannot answer for everyone, please keep in mind that the MAJORITY of people who are calling this a homosexual problem are not referring to chaste homosexuals. We are referring to the active homosexuals who are not chaste and who are deliberately trying to change Church teaching.

If you are chaste and believe in Church teaching, you are NOT who they are talking about. We are addressing the clergy, like McCarrick, who walked around as a Catholic Archbishop and later a Cardinal, while peer pressuring seminarians to sleep in the same bed with him at his beach house.

Many people within the Catholic media have known for a very long time about the unchaste behavior of clergy and seminarians, but many thought it had been handled (at least in the US) until the McCarrick situation.

The real issue is simply unchaste behavior in general. However, the reason why the homosexual unchaste behavior is emphasized is because that’s where the cover-up mentality comes into play the most.

The bishops typically haven’t hesitated about defrocking a priest or kick out a seminarian who has a consensual affair with an adult woman. However, they have had a tendency to cover up consensual homosexual affairs for a long time.

So again, this is where the cover-up mentality comes from. It’s rooted in the cover-up of consensual homosexual affairs, spreading to other sexual scandals and crimes.

Point is: we should not simply demand that our priests not be sexual predators. We should be demanding that our priests are 100% chaste.

So again, please do not let this discourage you, because the majority of people who are talking about this are NOT homophobic, because most are not referring to chaste priests with same sex attraction. They are referring to priests who use/watch gay porn, engage in homosexual acts, and/or those who are trying to undermine Catholic teaching.

God Bless.
 
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catholic1seeks said:
But it’s not so much God as Church. As one reply above included, a Catholic in a similar state ended up going to Anglicanism — not because his faith in God was lessened.
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But Anglicanism doesn’t have the real presence. The priest (mentioned above) who left the Catholic Church and became an Anglican priest is a perfect example of someone who DOES NOT believe in what the Catholic Church believes.

Any priest who leaves the Catholic priesthood and becomes a protestant priest/minister should have NEVER been a priest to being with. The fact that he joined up the Anglicans tells me that he never accepted Catholic teaching.

God bless
 
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amt1985 said:
As I said above, I’m paranoid of walking into a Catholic church because of how I’ve been treated and how I’ve seen other people like me treated. Now that my transition has significantly altered my appearance, I’m even more paranoid. Which isn’t to say I won’t one day work up the courage to walk through the doors anyway. I’m just not there yet.
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There is a parish near me where every day for the 5:15 PM daily mass, there is a gay man at mass, who wears a purse and often a female blouse.

No one ever gives him the stink eye, expect during the few times he starts rambling in another language during the priest’s homily. And they are not giving him the stink eye because of what he’s wearing or his sexual attraction… they give him the stink eye because he’s making noise that the whole chapel can hear.

Otherwise, he’s fine and sticks around after Mass for the Rosary (which he often prays in another language too).

The Catholic Church is filled with sinners. You are no less welcome than the divorced and remarried (without annulment). And if you are chaste, then you (unlike them) are welcome to Communion.

So God bless you and know you are welcome. And don’t let the “back row mafia” chase you away.
 
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Augustinian said:
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amt1985:
When I waited tables, every Ash Wednesday I’d see lots of customers with ashes on their foreheads ordering gigantic steaks
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Not everyone with ashes on their heads on Ash Wednesday is Catholic- plenty of non-Catholic churches do it too.
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Yeap, a lot of mainline Protestant churches do Ash Wednesday.
 
amt1985 said:
Well, as I said, my anxiety and paranoia are such that I haven’t been able to work up the courage to talk to anyone face-to-face yet. I’m working on overcoming that. Hopefully I will soon. But I’m not there yet.

Thank you for your thoughts. I’m sorry I brought it up. I’m off to bed now. I may rejoin the conversation tomorrow, or I may not. In either case, good night.
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If you are not ready to talk face-to-face, I totally get that. I HATE talking to a priest face to face in confession about my sexual sins. Sexual sin and sexual temptations are personal and hard to talk about, regardless if they are heterosexual or homosexual in nature.

ALMOST every time I go to confession (which is 1-2 times per month) I have sexual sins. So I go to confession behind the screen and get whatever is bothering me off my chest, knowing the priest isn’t going to judge me.

Honestly, the confessional is my best friend!

God Bless you.
 
mrsdizzyd said:
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Shakuhachi:
Maybe even try to disentangle “disordered” from sinful.
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I wouldn’t hold my breath on this one. As difficult as the word “disordered” is, this is the basis for the Catholic position. I can’t think of another substitute that would be any less difficult.
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They really should use a different word. The way the word “disordered” is used in the Catechism has a very specific technical meaning which even here is CAF is often conflated with the notion of mental illness, the kinds of things that are listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
 
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I agree with you 100 per cent. You either agree to follow the rules of God or you do not. If one does not act as a homosexual, one is in line with church and its teachings. I am talking about a pra cticing homosexual!
 
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Thorolfr said:
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mrsdizzyd:
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Shakuhachi:
Maybe even try to disentangle “disordered” from sinful.
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I wouldn’t hold my breath on this one. As difficult as the word “disordered” is, this is the basis for the Catholic position. I can’t think of another substitute that would be any less difficult.
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They really should use a different word. The way the word “disordered” is used in the Catechism has a very specific technical meaning which even here is CAF is often conflated with the notion of mental illness, the kinds of things that are listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
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But, what would be that word that would still convey that technical meaning? That’s the problem.
 
PureKathleen46 said:
If one does not act as a homosexual,
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What do you mean by this? Just wondering if it’s something that the Church doesn’t expect of LGBT persons.

Also, the poster you replied to didn’t answer the OP’s question but is promoting their own agenda which is for LGBT people to basically to sit down and shut up. Is that your position as well? Asking for a friend.
 
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My position is to obey God almighty. What don’t you understand?
 
Do you think the OP was suggesting anything different? Do you understand what they are asking?
 
I would change it to “improperly ordered” myself. Gets the point across without conflating it with illness.

And I feel you OP. But you can’t make homphobic jerks not be homophobic jerks. Just stop visiting those sites and focus on your parish and those who will affirm you.
 
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