I did something wrong

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Thanks for being honest. The way you worded it just now has actually made me feel better.
It’s not that husbands don’t love their wives, it’s just the way that men are wired, and they do fight against it - out of love for their wife, I guess.
Thanks! I feel better haha 🙂
 
Father Peter Glas who is an exorcist priest has videos on YouTube where he explains soul ties which result from sexual relations outside of marriage. Fr Glas is very knowledgable and experienced in the area of exorcism and deliverance so I trust and believe him when he speaks of soul ties. It is not nonsense and is consistent with Catholic teaching.
 
Ok, I didn’t read through all the replies, but as somebody who’s been cheated on I feel like your husband deserves to know. when I found out about about my husband’s infidelities the worst part wasn’t that it happened, it was that I was being lied to about it for so long. Yes it hurt, and my husband kept it to himself for a long time because he was also afraid I’d leave him. But we worked through it, I forgave him, he regrets everything and has been very patient with me earning back my trust. As a previous poster said, he can’t ever unknow it, but in time it won’t hurt anymore.

Even if you don’t tell your husband he’s going to know something is wrong. I remember reading something when my husband and I were going through everything that said “infidelity leaves a smell.” And I thought that was a very good way to put it, because it is almost like you can smell it, you don’t know what it is, but you know it’s there.

And one last thing, people make mistakes. If after 25 years of marriage your husband wants to end it because of a mistake that you whole heartedly regret and are truly sorry for he’s not as committed to the marriage as you think he is.
 
To be honest,I can’t believe there are posters saying don’t tell him.
One even said it was charitable to not tell him.
To me,the idea of keeping someone in the dark is somehow charitable is “nonsense”.
It’s not treating your husband with respect or as a man.
Does a doctor not tell a patient with cancer they have a cancer diagnosis out of some misguided concept of what being charitable means?

I think you should tell your husband even if it could risk the marriage.
You need to be brave and emotionally mature and think of his feelings and not your own fears.

He deserves to know and he deserves to be afforded the opportunity to decide whether he wants to stay married to someone who cheated on him for the children’s sake or whether he wants to end the marriage.

A marriage can’t be built on trust if there is no honesty.

I can’t imagine how any marriage can be healed starting from a place of further deception.
 
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You have zero doctrinal foundation for this.

Priests may be well intentioned and famous and still be wrong. We have the official doctrines of the Church where we can reference and determine the truth of anything we read in a book or watch on the internet.

Please, you do yourself no good by imagining things like personal demons. That is not contained in any Church teaching.
 
Soul ties are new age thinking, they are not part of the doctrine of the Church. Folks, just because it is on the internet does not mean it is correct!

Show me the where in the Catechism, the documents of a Council of the Church or an encyclical that there are “soul ties”.
 
The real hard part is the impact on the kids.

And it’s not always as cut and dry as intentional cheating. As a guy no one will believe my story as I have little proof. I acknowledge that I allowed myself to drink too much, but I didn’t leave the event with that person. I left on my own, and was followed sometime later. I’ll leave it there as I don’t want to go into details.
 
I mostly agree. I even considered quoting the charitable comment, crossing out charitable and adding convenient.

The only concern is that if the marriage is valid her husband is not entitled to find somebody else and if he leaves her that will be a temptation. He cannot end the marriage in the eyes of God.
 
No. And there are probably very few, if any, women who have never had a passing sexual thought about a man not their husband. It’s not about insufficient love.
 
The Holy Bible clearly spoke of demons. Christ dealt with demons and cast them out. He gave the disciples power to cast demons out. Christ encountered Satan and testified to his existence. Genesis recounts the fall of Lucifer and the rebel fallen angels. So scripture is clear about the existence of demons. But scripture does not tell us everything there is to know about them. The Catholic Church is not based on sola scriptura (scripture alone). It is based on scripture, tradition and the magisterium. Tradition, the writings of the Church Fathers and the Saints all tell us things not necessarily spelled out explicitly in scripture. They appear in scripture obviously but in ways maybe not developed.

The existence of the concept of soul ties is not new age. Father Glas is very wise, knowledgeable and experienced and if you listen to his presentations and study deliverance and demonology you will see that what is revealed in scripture is not exhaustive but gives a general overview. God gave us intellect and reason and expects us to use it.
 
Rules like this are part of the reason why I’m a Catholic by birth but not a practicing one.
It seems awful that a faithful husband or wife would be denied having a loving,healthy (second) marriage if their first spouse was unfaithful and they decided to leave them.

So their only choice is either to stay married to a person who isn’t trustworthy,or live as single without love and be celibate.
Or get remarried (civilly) and live in a state of sin.
All because they did the right thing and didn’t hurt their spouse by cheating on them.

I don’t really also understand how the Catholic believe matches what Jesus said about divorce being wrong except for when there’s infidelity.

Sure,some people might get an annulment if they can prove their husband/wife was insufficiently mature to enter the marriage validly but what if they were mature and just chose to cheat due to temptations -it seems cruel that the innocent spouse would be penalised.
Forgiving does mean a person should necessarily stay with the partner who was unfaithful.

I’m not sure how the Catholic Churches rules match with what they do in practice either as my sister was going to marry a non catholic sort of agnostic man who had been married previously and she spoke to the catholic priest whether he would marry then in the Catholic Church and he said that was fine 😳

I guess the “lesson” is to be very discerning who one chooses to marry.
 
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Its still necessary though for you to take some personal responsibility (not just about the heavy drinking but about what happened in the hotel room) as this will help with gaining maturity and for character building.
 
TheLittleLady said:
Please, you do yourself no good by imagining things like personal demons. That is not contained in any Church teaching.
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Demons most certainly are dogmatic Church teaching.

Demons exist. The devil exists. To say otherwise is flat out heretical.
 
Sorry Adam but that is not correct. Confession is necessary for forgiveness of sins, absolution. However did you ever wonder why some people keep committing a particular sin and keep having to return to confession for this same sin or sadly in some cases, give up? This is because underneath, underlying or behind the sin lies a spirit. Confession weakens the spirit but in order to root out and cast out the spirit then deliverance may be required. Many Catholics do not know or understand this. Confession is necessary and is extremely effective but deliverance prayer should be said also to conquer the underlying spirit, of lust, anger, lying or whatever.
 
Aaaand in that case you need to persist in prayer and strengthen the will. It’s not like a priest can say a few prayers and you’ll suddenly have the willpower to resist a habitual temptation.

There is no Catholic theology of this “soul bond”. The closest thing to it is when St. Paul talks about sexual sin and not “joining oneself” to a prostitute so as not to defile the body as a temple of the Holy Spirit. But there is no mention of what you’re talking about.

Yes there probably is a spirit that tempts us in ways that we’ll find particularly attractive. Everyone has their weak spots and Im sure demons know this. But It doesn’t help to throw around pseudo-theological concepts like “soul-tie” and “generational sin”.
 
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Wholeheartedly agree. No sense in looking for loopholes. One can justify even the slightest indiscretion. Never good, never. You are custody of our eyes and hearts.
 
[quote="Rozellelily, post:98,

I guess the “lesson” is to be very discerning who one chooses to marry.
[/quote]

Well, yeah. That IS the point Know who you are marrying and marry well. For all the right reasons. It’s for life. Do it right.
 
Of course they do.

However, the thought that each person and family are assigned a “personal demon” is ludicrous.
 
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