I give up trying to defeat my addictions

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You know God forgives. Dont lose hope. It’s a difficult time in your life now. Try you best and God sees your heart that you are trying. Confess your sins. Perhaps an open confession where the priest lays hands on you and fast from something else. It will give you strength.

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I’m going to have to learn to walk all over again. First thing will be to build up my muscles. It is going to hurt so much, and I can give up and be bedridden for life or I can keep getting stronger.

Have you tried getting rid of your smart devices? Get a dumb phone and turn off internet and cable.

Seems like a logical first step
 
Easier said than done. I am no longer a kid who only uses internet for frivolous stuff. Now, without internet, I am doomed.
 
Miguel2 said:
I have been trying for a long time to defeat my addiction to pornography and masturbation. And you know what? No progress has been made. On average I can do, being generous, a week, and my record is 11 days (that happened a long time ago).

I tried many strategies, but in the end, I can’t control myself. I never can. I pray and pray, but I am too weak to be able to defeat the urges, even with the help of God and the saints.
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Your writing perspective seems to indicate that you believe the origin of the sin habit lies within you. (as if your brain were physically addicted to a substance, like heroin). This potentially false belief turns the perspective of conquering the sin inward.

Consider for a moment the possibility of external demonic attachment as a source of the problem. Demonic attachments to the personality can develop from acts of illicit sex, or from viewing pornography. A demonic attachment is a being of pure energy with negative personality characteristics aimed at tempting you to sin, sullying your soul, separating you from God, inflicting self-loathing, and depression. These entities are similar to malware running in the background on your computer.

The demonic entity has the ability to manipulate your moods, or emotions, or provoke lustful feelings. Your mind and brain might actually be quite healthy, but the demonic entity might have the ability to provoke very strong feelings of the need for self-arousal, something you wrongly view as “your addiction.” Demonic attachments can be broken by Confession, exorcism, or prayer (See Manual For Spiritual Warfare by Paul Thigpen). Demonic attachments will be strengthened by viewing pornography.

The demonic attachment model externalizes the source of your problem. You are dealing with an adversarial personality, bent on your destruction.

You need to identify when these attacks (sudden strong temptations) overtake you. You must avoid the computer and immediately begin praying the Hail Mary, a prayer demons fear and hate. After several repetitions, the temptation may subside, as the demonic entity is repelled from you. You learn to overcome and emerge victorious.

Under circumstances of strong temptation, you certainly CAN resist. You are not helpless, like an infant. When the very strong temptation assails you, you are in a “free will” situation. You must engineer ways of doing what is right. You are morally answerable for your actions and must choose between right and wrong, as between water and fire.

You need to distinguish between temptation (for which you are not responsible) and the sinful acts of viewing pornography and self-stimulation (for which you are morally answerable).
 
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Miguel2 said:
Easier said than done. I am no longer a kid who only uses internet for frivolous stuff. Now, without internet, I am doomed.
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Doomed in what way? If you got rid of all technology in your home, TV, computers, smart phones, and just had a house phone and flip phone, can you list the negative consequences you would suffer?
 
My fall always starts with an intrusive thought related to porn. Then that initial thought becomes urges and more thoughts. The urges never go away and at some point, I can’t handle It anymore and finally fall. Even if I say “no” a few times, I end up falling because It is impossible to keep fighting with constant urges that NEVER go away, even if I pray.

It’s like constant running. At some point, your legs can’t take It anymore.
 
Well, God didn’t choose the hermit lifestyle to be my vocation, so is out of question to give up on the internet.
 
Dear friend in Christ:

Maybe it would be helpful to reflect on the grim origins
of this “entertainment.”

Everyone who performs in porn videos is made in
the image of God.

They’ve been reduced to commodities for the sexual
gratification of viewers. Imagine a friend or relative
trapped in that life. I’m sure you’d be horrified.

Read up on what leads performers into that lifestyle.
Some porn performers are victims of human trafficking.

Every time you feel tempted, ask yourself, “Do I have
a right to exploit these people?”

I hope these suggestions help.

A Prayer for Those With Pornography Addiction

Jesus, lover of chastity, Mary, mother most pure, and
Joseph, the guardian of the Virgin, we earnestly wish
to be pure in thought, word, and deed in imitation
of Your own holy purity.

Obtain for us, then, a deep sense of modesty which
will be reflected in our external conduct. Protect our
eyes, the windows of our souls, from anything that
might dim the luster of hearts that must mirror only
Christ-like purity.

And may the reception of Holy Communion seal
our hearts forever against the suggestions of sinful
pleasures.

Heart of Jesus, Fount of All Purity, have mercy on us.

Prayer for Chastity

Lord, inflame our hearts and our inmost
beings with the fire of Your Holy Spirit, that
we may serve You with chaste bodies and
pure minds. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.
 
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Advices that I already heard and tried. So sorry if I am being “negative with them”.

You keep insisting in those links of yours, but tell me, why should a watch/read them? Is there really anything new on them? Things that I never heard before?

I tried to block porn in all my devices, tried accountability partners, tried to pray a lot of different things, I consecrate myself to Mary, I tried to give all my temptations to God… And nothing worked.

Why I have the feeling that those links talk about things like “trust in Jesus, He will help you!”, “pray to Mary, demons fears her!” “pray that or pray that”… I won’t waste my time listening/reading to things that I already heard.

Yes, I trusted entirely on God and even so I wasn’t able to complete even one week. This week, I failed in the same day that I returned to pray (I stoppped praying for a few days). It’s ridiculous.

Praying the Rosary won’t do nothing, praying a novena won’t do nothing… Spiritual strategies simply doesn’t work with me, like anything else, apparently.
 
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Miguel2 said:
In a state of sanctifying grace I can really do one week, but eventually I throw away all God’s graces. I can’t maintain my chastity in a long term.
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If the help of grace is not cooperated with, then it means there is culpability for mortal sin, which can only occur through a voluntary act, so the thoughts and acts are not currently an addiction. In studies of the brain using imaging, those with addiction show physical changes of the brain in areas critical to judgment, decision-making, learning, memory, and behavior control. How can you be certain?
 
Well, at some point, I become unable to control the urges (which never go away). I can’t focus on anything and I am tormented by sexual thoughts until I finally masturbate. The urges are so frequently/constant, that my limited will power will eventually fail. It’s like your legs failling because you don’t stop running.
 
If this is a long-term problem that interferes with your life and all means that you know of have been extensively tried (12 step groups for sex addicts, all sorts of things), consider your medical options. Perhaps a psychiatrist could help. I know someone who finally could stop only after being given a medication. It took several tries to find the right one, and problem solved. Some minor effort was still required, but that was all. Stopping was suddenly possible.
 
Talk to a good priest who can help you spiritually and prepare you to make a good confession. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you know your sins, have true contrition for them and help you to amend your life.

NO sin is greater than the Precious Blood of Jesus which cleanses your soul in confession.
 
A quick search showed retreat centres that help in the US ,some of them sound very good…is this an option for the op ?
 
Yes and I already tried the “just trust in God’s help” strategy. Can’t see why this would work now. I can’t see why anything would be different this time. All I can see is that if I try to stop my habits today, in 4 days I will be in the same place I am now. The cycle will repeat, as always.
 
Hello HuH, Welcoem to the forums!

Thank you for being so generous with trying help OP and registering for this sole purpose.

God bless you!
 
I am sorry, but I am sure you did not try the “just trust in God’s help”. In all of your posts you are constantly saying what YOU tried. How exactly did you try the “just trust in God’s help”?
 
It’s hard to put on words. I simply tried to give all my temptations and struggles to God, and hopped that I would be able to defeat, with his help, the urges when they come. Didn’t last long, even trusting entirely in God’s help.
 
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