It’s best you never come to England and Wales then, as our Bishops’ Conference has specifically designated a handshake as the norm for the sign of peace. I don’t know why all other Bishops’ Conferences don’t do likewise and designate a suitable gesture. It would save a lot of confusion.
I would still sit near her and return her hug each time.
Now we’re into cultural issues. In the UK hugs are reserved for close family members and generally given in private. Hugging acquaintances and strangers is not the cultural norm over here.
Yes, hugging (in my culture) means:
If you asked me if you could give me a hug I’d probably take a couple of quick steps back, look strangely at you and think, “How can I politely leave this mad woman’s house as soon as possible without causing upset?”
I lived on London and did not find this to be the case or maybe I was just lucky with the company I kept?
London (particularly its more cosmopolitan areas) is quite different from most of the rest of the UK. Also the more sloaney/yuppy types in London are into big over-the-top gestures, air-kissing, hugs etc. (such gestures always strike me as very insincere).
Brendan, to be fair, there is not the widespread public affection of kissing on the lips/mouth in the U.S. as some have been trying to push here. In fact, I was surprised at our 50th year class reunion there was even very little hugging going on. But, having lived in both the U.S. and the U.K., I know there are cultural and linguistic differences between the two countries so you’re right on that.
I’ve never been to the US, but my impression of Americans that live over here are that they are generally very polite and friendly people, but have this tendency for over-the-top gestures (which can be considered insincere and at times a bit inappropriate over here).That would actually make a very interesting thread, but we’re veering off topic now and the mods are likely to come steaming into us at any moment.
Yes, I see insincerity as more of a problem in the U.S. And there are reasons for it. I agree it would make an interesting thread.
You do know that flu and most germs are spread mainly through particles in the air? You will need to wear a face-mask at Mass (or anywhere else for that matter).
And likewise, If you ever have someone from America visit your house (and you don’t know them very well) then don’t ask if you can hug them either. The practice of hugging everyone that some people have taken up is not practiced by most people that I know or am acquainted with here. I am still getting used to family hugging when we visit them (they are about 2,000 miles away) after not having seen them in several years.
I thought someonf would try this augument, what about (fill in the blank). I reject the reasoning that it make it a mini family event, I kiss my wife, give my son a hug and then thurn to those around me and greet them.
Since the kiss of peace is not an extention of hospitallity, but one of recongizing fellow folowers of Christ your comment falls shorts.
My husband and I had a great laugh! Thank you.
Maybe its a Southern Thing… Little old Southern ladies are likely to grab you and give you a hug and think you’re just being bashful… but I’ll shake your hand.
Of course the family unit is central to church teaching. It is also central to society. I am only saying that recognizing the family unit or marital love is not the purpose of the sign of peace.
Ahh… You looked around for the first time!Welp I kissed my husband in church today and we didn’t burst into flames
I also looked around for the first time and we are definitely not alone.
Remind me not to sit behind youMy wife for one would not be happy.
Really please rethink this – it is liturgy and a liturgical sign of peace. Not a sign of family affection. Also check with the diocese you are in as to the established signs of peace.
It is a liturgical sign and is also affected by the culture in which the particular church is situated. By marriage I am part of a kiss-on-both-cheeks-to-greet culture - it is something we do, even if we have just met the particular member of the large, extended family for the first time; this extend to my friends, although I have to remember that most of them come from a kiss-on-one-cheek culture. In church, which we attend as a family, often filling two pews, we follow the norm of the church in our country and shake hands, none of us would dream of using any other gesture.