The point is why draw more attention to yourselves at the sign of peace than you need to? If everyone around me does handshakes or nods, I’ll go with the flow, thank you. I don’t see the need for flaunting a relationship in the pews.
I do not “flaunt” when I kiss my husband in the pew or hug or kiss my kids.
I never kiss my husband to provoke anything or to show defiance to anyone. It doesn’t matter if I am at church or home or shopping or walking down the street.
Why do you think that people who give a quick kiss to their spouse as a sign of peace are flaunting a relationship?
There are times when additions have to be made, and the wedding ceremony is one of them including adapting to cultural difference. Even though not in the book, I pronounce the couple man and wife and have them kiss.
The sign of peace is a sign of one community in Christ, that community exit of multiple smaller communities, the family and married couples. The show of affection between members of the smaller community, expanding to the larger community should not cause an issue with anyone.
And yet, as is evident from this thread, it does seem to cause an issue. The issue is more fully explained in Michelle Arnold’s blog post. The sign of peace is a sign of community, and yet we often find that most of the ‘peace’ being shared is not among the community but among family. In some respects, the rite becomes a sign of division rather than unity, and that’s not what is intended.
What better time can there be!
Yes, but as I understand it, the sign of peace begins at the altar and then gets extended to the congregation. Couples making out doesn’t quite fit that flow IMO.
Beg to differ, especially if there are many who come to church by themselves around them.
Michelle Arnold was sharing an opinion as she stated just as all of us are. She gives a description of what she says usually occurs at your local Mass. What I see is that most family members greet the people nearest them and not every family member down the pew. I do not usually see people crossing the aisle to give a sign of peace either, yet these things do happen. Instead of blaming those who use the sign of a kiss as causing an issue, or falsely accusing people of flaunting family affection as another has said, I think we should we point where the problem really is. The real issue is that there has been little instruction given about the sign of peace, and no correction coming from any authority to exclude the sign of a kiss. Some of those who shake hands are not engaging in any more of a community sign of peace than the rest of us if they have no knowledge of the meaning behind it.
Precisely.
In my experience those with large families don’t have time or don’t care to greet others outside their families. What do we have, about 30 seconds before we resume with the Agnus Dei?
It sounds to me like the issue is deeper than trying to educate about the rite of sign of peace. With the accusation of accusing of flaunting family affection and now this against large families, what is really at the root of these accusations?
I never thought about it that much until this thread, to be honest. OTOH, it only makes sense that the gesture should be consistent to everyone, as the whole point is to “engage in a ritual that signifies our unity in Christ”. Zab is right, it would be nice if there were more instruction.I simply do not understand the conflict in this, or where there is cause for argument. To give your spouse a peck on the cheek before offering an equally graceful sign of peace to those around you is not akin to couples “making out”, “flaunting their relationships”, or any of the other adverse terms flying around here. We are to give a sign of peace with love in our hearts to those around us. Those of us who have families are generally sitting with our family, so understandably we extend the greeting of peace to our family members first. They are nearest to us in proximity. Then we offer peace to those in front of and behind us. I can’t help but wonder if someone who witnesses a peck on the cheek and finds offense (or even a peck on the lips for that matter) could possibly be misplacing their zeal…? Why allow someone who is acting within the parameters of the Church distract you from having peace in your heart at the Mass? I don’t get it.
