Men - how do you feel about your wife seeing a male physician?

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Homers said:
My wife has a male dentist.
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You are TOTALLY delusional if you think that male dentists don’t ever abuse female patients!!! :eek:

kirotv.com/investigations/11086285/detail.html

msnbc.msn.com/id/29636965/

news10.net/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=55296&catid=2

victimsover18.blogspot.com/2008/04/dentist-charged-with-sexual-abuse-of.html

I appreciate the fact that you feel strongly about this topic, that’s why I started the discussion. But I think that your reasoning is not healthy, and the fact that you think it is totally safe for your wife to see ANY male for ANY professional purpose and assume she is safe because she keeps her clothes on is very naive.

~Liza
 
Homers said:
You should possibly review the previous link about what male doctors really think and feel about gyn exams. It might really change your point of view!
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And this link speaks for all male doctors? I don’t think so. It’s funny how one website tells us what every male OB/GYN thinks.

You know, there have been priests in the past who feel it is ok to have sex with women. And have sexually abused women. Which means that, by your own logic, all priests think like that. Which means I guess I should not feel good about my wife seeing a male priest:rolleyes:. God forbid I leave them alone in the confessional.

In any profession, there will ALWAYS be bad apples. I’m a deputy sheriff. I can immediately think of several bad apples. Does that mean we are all bad apples? No, of course not. Have I had to do pat downs of females in search of weapons? Yes. Have I gotten any sexual arousal out of it? No. I’m sure there are some deputies somewhere who have. It doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t professionally perform our jobs. Including calling out the bad apples when you see them.

My wife sees a male OB/GYN. How do I feel about it? Well, considering I picked him out for her since she didn’t know any in the area and I did, I guess I don’t have a problem with it.

To each their own on this subject, but don’t deride the rest of us who choose differently.
 
AHapka said:
And this link speaks for all male doctors? I don’t think so. It’s funny how one website tells us what every male OB/GYN thinks.

You know, there have been priests in the past who feel it is ok to have sex with women. And have sexually abused women. Which means that, by your own logic, all priests think like that. Which means I guess I should not feel good about my wife seeing a male priest:rolleyes:. God forbid I leave them alone in the confessional.

In any profession, there will ALWAYS be bad apples. I’m a deputy sheriff. I can immediately think of several bad apples. Does that mean we are all bad apples? No, of course not. Have I had to do pat downs of females in search of weapons? Yes. Have I gotten any sexual arousal out of it? No. I’m sure there are some deputies somewhere who have. It doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t professionally perform our jobs. Including calling out the bad apples when you see them.

My wife sees a male OB/GYN. How do I feel about it? Well, considering I picked him out for her since she didn’t know any in the area and I did, I guess I don’t have a problem with it.

To each their own on this subject, but don’t deride the rest of us who choose differently.
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Who said the link spoke for all male doctors? I just believe that there is a “less chance” of impropieties occurring with same sex care givers. If you want to take chances with your marriage, so be it. What self respecting (married) woman would submit herself to a “non-emergent” male gyn exam when there is time to make an appointment to see a just as qualified female doctor who has the same “plumbing”? It’s beyond me! If there was ever a “code-blue” situation, by all means, the first available doctor please!
 
Men - how do you feel about your wife seeing a male physician?
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It depends. Is he covered on our insurance as an in-network or out-of-network physician?
 
Leopard said:
It depends. Is he covered on our insurance as an in-network or out-of-network physician?
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Leopard…Hopefully you would be more concerned about just the issue of health-insurance here? Wouldn’t you rather your wife be seen by a just as qualified female doctor for all of her “intimate” needs, even if that meant she had to drive a bit further? Just a question…
 
Every male doctor I have every had always had a female nurse in the room every time he examined me.
 
Homers said:
Leopard…Hopefully you would be more concerned about just the issue of health-insurance here? Wouldn’t you rather your wife be seen by a just as qualified female doctor for all of her “intimate” needs, even if that meant she had to drive a bit further? Just a question…
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Certainly. But the question wasn’t about whether the doctor was qualified, it was about whether the doctor was male. And I consider that issue less important than how this visit will be covered by the insurance company.
 
Angel_Bradford said:
Every male doctor I have every had always had a female nurse in the room every time he examined me.
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I would still have to contend that even if a male doctor had a female nurse present, it still doesn’t make it proper. I have heard that the assistant is more or less there for the protection of the doctor, and not the patient, and that the assistant isn’t viewing the exam from the “foot-end” of things. Also, some women have been known to be “arroused” during these exams. So, again I submit that modesty is the best policy. Peace…
 
From a female perspective, I don’t see the huge issue, except…when I got into my 30’s, and I wanted a female professional perspective as to some of the changes I was having. Men can compare women to other patients, their wives, but ultimately, it’s book knowledge, and I much prefer now a woman because of that. From an exam standpoint, women are gentler…I have found the exams to be less painful, for lack of a better word.

I did have a bad ‘encounter’ with a dr who is male about 10 years ago, or so…and the nurse left the room during the exam which I thought was very strange. She was there for part of it, and then left. He took, let’s say, way too long to examine me. He came highly recommended, had a lot of experience…delivered friends’ babies, etc…but I could never visit him again, after that experience. I’m not saying he was ‘into’ it, I’m just saying, as a female patient, we know when something is off, and that was definitely the only weird experience I have ever had in the 20 years I have been seening ob/gyns.

I had outstanding male docs deliver my kids…but now, I prefer to visit a female physician as she just naturally understands my issues, I think, better than a man.

Just my two cents.

PS–But, my husband was never upset about me visiting male doctors…(except the weird one from 10 yrs ago)
 
Homers said:
Also, some women have been known to be “arroused” during these exams. So, again I submit that modesty is the best policy. Peace…
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If a woman has a tendency to be aroused by this sort of examination, then I suspect it does not matter if it is a woman or a man doing the exam. Not that the woman would have lesbian tenancies, but that arousal is arousal. I just don’t see that it would make much of a difference if any in this situation. If she’s aroused that a man is examining her, why not when a woman is examining her? If it is the EXAM “activity” and not the PERSON that is causing the arousal. :confused:

Also - what difference does it make at all if the patient does become aroused? Do you think this would “turn on” a make physician ONLY because he is male? That is a horrible accusation to make.

~Liza
 
I didn’t vote; I’m female.

My ob/gyn is a male. He’s the second one I’ve had. The first retired. In fact, my doctor married the female ob/gyn at the hospital. I like him a lot. He’s very kind and gentle. He has become even more so since his wife had a couple of babies! 😛

Oh, just to mention, I deliver pretty quickly, and I have only had the doctor at the delivery itself once. That was the time my baby was two months premature, and there were about 8 people in that room, my doctor, a couple of midwives, a couple of nurses, and the NICU pediatrician. And my husband. 😃

The rest of the times (all four), the doctor was never actually in the delivery room. Only the midwives were. They’re great.

(My hospital doesn’t do epidurals, just the spinal block stuff for C-sections. Nothing for the vaginal deliveries. So I’ve never had one. I suppose I must have already learned the “lesson” mentioned above! 😉 )
 
Homers said:
Who said the link spoke for all male doctors? I just believe that there is a “less chance” of impropieties occurring with same sex care givers. If you want to take chances with your marriage, so be it. What self respecting (married) woman would submit herself to a “non-emergent” male gyn exam when there is time to make an appointment to see a just as qualified female doctor who has the same “plumbing”? It’s beyond me! If there was ever a “code-blue” situation, by all means, the first available doctor please!
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“What self respecting (married) woman would submit herself…” Well, since my wife does that means in your opinion she is not self respecting. I’ll have to mention your personal slight against her to her so that she knows you think she is not self respecting. Funny how you know her so well.

“I just believe that there is “less chance” of impropieties” So this is based on your beliefs? And not any empirical evidence? Please show me a research study or other unbiased research to support your accusations about the percentage of improprieties or don’t present it as fact. And don’t forget that women can abuse other women in ways that are not physical. I’ve heard of plenty a female OB/GYN and nurses putting down the feelings or beliefs of other women. I’ll never forget my wife telling me about a female nurse at the practice (not her doctors nurse) lecturing her on having another baby so quickly and saying “don’t you know what birth control is?” Causing mental anguish can be just as serious as causing physical anguish.

You have your beliefs and I respect that. As an American citizen, I will fight to keep your right to say what you believe. But when you imply that my wife is not “self respecting” because she would “submit” herself to an exam by a male doctor, those are fighting words.
 
Where is the thread about how women feel about their husbands seeing a female physician?
 
JimG said:
Where is the thread about how women feel about their husbands seeing a female physician?
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I see a male OB/GYN and DH sees our female family physician. I certainly hope she’s doing the examinations she should be doing on a man his age and I don’t have a problem with him seeing her. I’ve only ever had male OB/GYN, except for the one who was present for our daughter’s birth and she just happened to be replacing my usual OB.
 
Many women and their husbands will find the All Female OB/GYN Directory useful because they desire for the women to only have intimate health care by female doctors. They also want to do whatever to assure that the women will only have female gynecologists doing intimate examinations and procedures on them such as pap smears, pelvic examinations, breast examinations, hysterectomies, ovarian cyst removals, etc. Many women and their husbands only want female medical providers to be there for the birthing process.

We encourage doctors to respect women and husbands’ desires to have only female medical providers for intimate female medical care. Please do whatever you can do to respect women’s wishes when they want only female medical professionals such as anesthesiologists, scrubs, nurses, assistants, etc. in the room for surgeries, birth, etc. If a woman must have an emergency Cesarean section and she desires to have only female medical professionals in the room during the process, please try your best to get a female anesthesiologist. If that is not possible, you should ask the male anesthesiologist stay out of the room until you all have done all of the prepping for surgery including putting in the catheter. Be sure to keep the woman properly covered at all times so that her modesty and dignity are protected.

As for intimate examinations you may do on women, please do whatever you can to protect the lady’s modesty. Be sure you keep the door closed when you do intimate examinations. Always ask the lady for permission about if she wants any medical students (even female) in the room with you all.

Men who don’t want their wives to not go to a male gynecologist are not crazy. They just love their wives so much that they don’t want another man to access and see the private parts of their wives. Some women and their husbands want to protect their intimacy and they feel like their intimacy is violated when the women are treated by male gynecologists. The bond between a husband and a wife is very special when they never expose their private parts to another person of the opposite sex.

Many women prefer female gynecologists for a variety of reasons. Some of the reasons are: 1.) They feel very uncomfortable having a male gynecologist treating them for intimate examinations. 2.) They feel like female gynecologists can understand some things better. For example, men never have cramps, ovarian cysts, and other female health problems. 3.) They want to protect the intimacy between their husbands or future husbands and themselves. 4.) They want their husband to be the only man in the world to see them naked or access certain parts of their body. 5.) Religious and moral reasons.

The All Female OB/Gyn Directory encourages all doctors to be sensitive to why many women patients and their husbands may not want the women to have another male in the room for intimate procedures or surgeries and not question them why.

Link:
allfemaleobgyndirectory.com/tipsfordoctors.aspx
 
As someone who has chronic illness and has dealt with doctors all her life I find the recent poster Homer’s assessments rather disturbing. There is nothing sexual or intimate about gynological exams. If someone can’t separate medical treatment from the beauty of intimacy between a husband and wife that is their personal problem. Honestly this really starting to sound like a bit of a perversive obsession. I don’t mean to be rude but it sounds like this particular poster finds vaginal exams sexually stimulating so he assumes all men must feel that way.

I never been intimate with anyone but my husband, and I can tell you their is nothing sexual, erotic or stimulating about such an exam. The whole idea that a pap smear is equated with intimacy is just gross.:eek:
 
If a woman wants another woman as her OB/GYN that’s her business. In this town she’d be out of luck, the only OB/GYN is a man as are the only surgeon and the only anesthetist, and that doesn’t look as though it’s going to change soon.
 
Not to mention that equating medical care with immodesty is dangerous.

I’m sorry, but when I’m at the doctor’s office, I’m not secretly wondering whether my male doctor is immature and unprofessional enough to see the body as just that-the body. Likewise, I’m not wondering about my female doctor’s sexual orientation and wondering why she would even choose the profession if that’s what she had to do all day. That’s just sick and wrong on both counts. We can’t even have faith in our doctors wanting to, I don’t know, help people stay healthy?

All I care about is if the doctor is kind, professional, pro-life or at least understanding of my decisions to stay abstinent and not use contraceptives, covered by my health insurance (because you know what? I’m not made of money and while God provides, money helps!), and is competent. I care more about competence than I ever could about chromosomes.
 
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