I know what you mean about the liquids. I did that too. Slim Fast was wonderful except it had to be mixed with milk. They didn’t come out with the ready made shakes until later.
My problem was I felt so good about my weight loss that I kept going and going and going to the point where I ended up with anorexia. No knew what that was at the time. When you have it, you don’t see your bones and your ribs. You still see your fat self. The day of Karen Carpenter’s death, I looked at myself in the mirror and see what everyone else saw for the first time. I burst into tears and started eating again.
The fear of the anorexic me resurfacing is why I want to eat solid food again. I see signs of it happening because when I was told I’d lost 20 lbs due to just having the liquids, I thought, “And if I stay on the liquids, I can lose 20 more and then 20 more and…”
The temptation not to eat is so strong. But I’m lucky. My surgeon knows about my past with anorexia. And I’m being closely monitored. That’s one reason yesterday’s episode with the mashed potatoes needed to be reported and seen to. It was important to them to make sure my throat was okay and important to me that they see I wasn’t refusing to eat.
Anyway, I am counting my blessings and will stick to the liquids as long as I have to while taking each day as it comes and seeing if my throat can handle food. Yes, I’m a foodie. But like you, I eat to live not live to eat.
Cranberry juice and watermelon water tonight.