Sterilization followed by confession?

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If a person disagrees fundamentally with Church teaching on contraception, to the point where after YEARS of prayer and study, honestly believes the Church to be in error on this, believes that God does not have a problem with contraception, etc., and decides to become sterilized, what happens?

If this person decided to get sterilized and then confess to the priest that although they are sorry to have gone against the Church, they do not believe that what they did was a grave sin and are happy with the outcome, and also confesses the sin of presumption (since they intended to be sterilized and confess it all along), would they be able to be absolved and start receiving communion again?

This is not a debate about contraception.
I’m not a theologian, but it sounds as if they are not truly repentant, and a priest should not absolve them of their sin until they are contrite over their sin. From what I have heard and read, that kind of disobedience is akin to blasphemy of the Holy Spirit.

(Open to correction here, if someone wants to take a stab at it)
 
NO ONE has stated you must, or SHOULD, have 6 kids or any other number of kids nor that the Church requires you to. I’ve **repeatedly **said just the opposite.

I only commented that if you **truly **believe doing so would “RUIN YOUR LIFE” then yes there **could **be something underlying that that would be healthy to investigate.

I think you have some issues-- or at least many years of feminist brainwashing-- based on your statements that you don’t believe you can have kids and a career or a fulfilling life. That may be true for you, but it is very sad if it is true. Many, many women have both. It’s just a FALSE premise to state that a woman who has a family must necessarily be “barefoot and pregnant” or relegated to the “kitchen.” That is REPUGNANT and a fallacious and illogical argument. If you cannot argue logically, we can never get anywhere.

There are MANY examples of women who have been successful AND mothers.

Your analogy is nonsensical.

The Church’s teaching on contraception is neither irrational nor immoral.
Ike, I stated alreadythat the analogy was not a perfect or even close parallel of situations but of FEELINGS. I have repeatedly asked even one Catholic here to say what they would do if they suddenly discovered a mandatory Church directive that they found to be as morally offensive as I find this one (and so I gave an extreme example in order to give you all an idea of what that might feel like), and not one person has dared to answer whether they would follow the teaching anyway. I’m guessing it’s not very comfortable for any of you to think about. Welcome to my world.
 
If I have 6 kids and will die if I have another one, the ONLY sensical, logical, moral thing to do is become sterilized. The very idea that I would not do this because of the idea that “sex was made for making babies” when it is a simple outpatient procedure that would save my life and harm no-one and help my marriage at he same time is absurd. The only thing more absurd is thinking that God would actually have a problem win this.
That is not the ONLY sensible, logical or moral thing to do. It just may be the easiest thing to do. Conservative NFP or continence are both valid options and are both also sensible, logical and moral. Sterilization is only moral IF you take God out of your decision making process.

The Church does not tell you to have six children or to try to get pregnant if you have a health reason not to. I have two children but wanted more. I had serious complications with my second so used NFP to delay another child. As it turned out, I did not have any fertile years left. 😦 There are dozens of people on this forum alone who have similar stories. It’s not the easy way out but doing the right thing is rarely doing the easiest thing

It sounds very much like you are overwhelmend with your current pregnancy. I hope all goes well with your birth and having the new addition in your home.
 
Oh and let’s not forget about Onan, who was NOT killed for failing to fully embrace a Levirite marriage wih Tamar (as such a custom did not come into play until much later, and even then, the punishment would have been a public humiliation ceremony, not death), but for wasting his seed on the ground. This is the biblical basis for he condemnation of both masturbation, coitus interruptus and ABC.
 
If I have 6 kids and will die if I have another one, the ONLY sensical, logical, moral thing to do is become sterilized.
What would be your “contingency plan” should you get pregnant, even after sterilization, LaSainte?
 
That is not the ONLY sensible, logical or moral thing to do. It just may be the easiest thing to do. Conservative NFP or continence are both valid options and are both also sensible, logical and moral. Sterilization is only moral IF you take God out of your decision making process.

The Church does not tell you to have six children or to try to get pregnant if you have a health reason not to. I have two children but wanted more. I had serious complications with my second so used NFP to delay another child. As it turned out, I did not have any fertile years left. 😦 There are dozens of people on this forum alone who have similar stories. It’s not the easy way out but doing the right thing is rarely doing the easiest thing

It sounds very much like you are overwhelmend with your current pregnancy. I hope all goes well with your birth and having the new addition in your home.
Thank you so much :). I am overwhelmed. Excited, but overwhelmed. I HATE taking care of newborns. Sleepless nights, colic, and now I cant even nap with the baby because I have a 2 year old to take care of as well, so say hello to 4 hours of sleep a day for 3 or more months. Did I mention I get PPD something fierce? And that it was a solid year before my son slept through the night? I was a zombie for months, and I would just break down crying and feeling so hopeless, and that was with ONE baby.

I just pray that he’s healthy and happy. I’ll be fine after the first few months I’m sure, and I know that once I lay eyes on my little guy I will love him like crazy (I hope). I just am not one of those women who likes all this stuff, or wants to even LOOK at other people’s babies and kids. I didn’t even like babysitting when I was a teenager.

And I don’t see a medically necessary sterilization as “cutting God out of the equation”. I see it as using the common sense and technology He gave us to try not to die.
 
Ike, I stated alreadythat the analogy was not a perfect or even close parallel of situations but of FEELINGS. I have repeatedly asked even one Catholic here to say what they would do if they suddenly discovered a mandatory Church directive that they found to be as morally offensive as I find this one (and so I gave an extreme example in order to give you all an idea of what that might feel like), and not one person has dared to answer whether they would follow the teaching anyway. I’m guessing it’s not very comfortable for any of you to think about. Welcome to my world.
Well, your analogy is as nonsensical as an atheist saying, “Imagine that Jesus was really Hannibal Lecter and he went around looking for Clarisse Starling to mess around with and …”

Maybe you could engage in a dialogue and pursue the analogy with this atheist, but in my mind, the analogy is so far out of the realm of reality that I couldn’t engage. More power to you if you could!
 
Ike, I stated alreadythat the analogy was not a perfect or even close parallel of situations but of FEELINGS. I have repeatedly asked even one Catholic here to say what they would do if they suddenly discovered a mandatory Church directive that they found to be as morally offensive as I find this one (and so I gave an extreme example in order to give you all an idea of what that might feel like), and not one person has dared to answer whether they would follow the teaching anyway. I’m guessing it’s not very comfortable for any of you to think about. Welcome to my world.
The Church cannot err in faith and morals. So, I would obey the Church.
 
What would be your “contingency plan” should you get pregnant, even after sterilization, LaSainte?
Well I guess I would just die then. Bummer.

But, if it was that serious, I wouldn’t mess around with regular sterilization. I would probably just have my uterus removed.
 
Sex should be both unitive and procreative. The lovemaking between husband and wife involves a creativity between the spouses and God that is representative of the Trinity. It is a creative and PROcreative love that withholds nothing. Just as Christ, God and the Holy Spirit withhold nothing from each other in their unity, neither should the husband or wife withhold their fertility from one another during lovemaking, thereby shutting God Himself out.

Unless sex is BOTH unitive (bonding) AND procreative (open to the potential for the creation of human life), it is not a licit act and goes against every ing God intended for he marital embrace.

NFP is licit because it does nothing to alter the martial act itself, either before, during or after the fact. Such is not the case with condoms, the pill, IUDs, sterilization, etc. NFP utilizes our natural, God-given fertility cycles and our abiliy to predict fertility to enable us to abstain from sex on fertile days if we have serious reasons for not wanting to conceive. Wih NFP, no “action” is undertaken to prevent the fertilization of the egg and periodic abstinence has never been sinful (read St. Paul for an early mention of it), therefore, NFP in no way goes against the unitive or procreative nature of sex as it was intended and neither spouse is rejecting or withholding fertility in any way.

That is not to say that NFP can never be sinful. If practiced for selfish reasons or with a “contraceptive mentality”, it can be sinful. The church gives examples of valid reasons for the use of NFP but essentially leaves it up to the couple to prayerfully discern if they need to use NFP to space heir children.

When sex is used in the proper way, man and wife open themselves up to becoming “co-creators” with God. Artificial contraception attempts to cut God out of this equation and is gravely sinful.

See Casti Connubii(sp?), Humanae Vitae, Theology of the Body or even the writings of Christopher West for the Church’s position on the matter.

Etc. Etc. Etc.

I could go on, but this is just what I came up with off the top of my head.
Well, LaSainte, I give you an A. I stand corrected.
[SIGN1]
I apologize for thinking that that which you violently reject you are ignorant of.[/SIGN1]

I will give you an A+ if you can state honestly that you’ve read *Castii Connubi, Humanae Vitae *and Pope JPII’s TOB.
 
Well I guess I would just die then. Bummer.

But, if it was that serious, I wouldn’t mess around with regular sterilization. I would probably just have my uterus removed.
Let me rephrase. You only want 2 children. You get pregnant next year with Baby #3, despite your best efforts to thwart this.

What is your contingency plan?

Do you believe abortion is a moral option for you?
 
Well, your analogy is as nonsensical as an atheist saying, “Imagine that Jesus was really Hannibal Lecter and he went around looking for Clarisse Starling to mess around with and …”

Maybe you could engage in a dialogue and pursue the analogy with this atheist, but in my mind, the analogy is so far out of the realm of reality that I couldn’t engage. More power to you if you could!
However, LaSainte does have a piont-- although I agree her analogy is nonsensical.

I had someone at Church ask me once what I would do if the Church declared women’s ordination as valid and licit. I think that’s a better analogy, as it pertains to an area of faith and morals and is not an intrinsically evil act such as beating children.

One need not focus on **what **it is the person is proposing, but the fact that they are proposing the Church teaches A and you disagree with A.

So in that vein, here is my answer (which I already gave, actually):

If the Church is truly unable to err in faith and morals, then the only logical conclusion is that I would assent to the Church’s teaching and follow it.
 
I am overwhelmed. Excited, but overwhelmed.

I HATE taking care of newborns.

**Did I mention I get PPD something fierce? **

I would just break down crying and feeling so hopeless, and that was with ONE baby
.
and I know that once I lay eyes on my little guy I will love him like crazy (I hope).

I just am not one of those women who likes all this stuff, or wants to even LOOK at other people’s babies and kids. I didn’t even like babysitting when I was a teenager.
OK, I reiterate my suggestion that you get some help. Your other statements led me to believe the bolded might be the case, and you have now confirmed it.
 
If the Church is truly unable to err in faith and morals, then the only logical conclusion is that I would assent to the Church’s teaching and follow it.
Ditto here.

In fact I have said as much on previous posts.

To wit, here, of late:

As I believe that “he who hears you hears me” reflects the Church (She is, after all, the one who preserved those words of Christ), then, if the Church proclaimed that I would do what I would do if Jesus Himself came before me and said

That is, I would believe it.
 
Well, LaSainte, I give you an A. I stand corrected.
I disagree. These are just words.

I could recite the Communist Manifesto if I were sufficiently motivated to do so. It doesn’t mean I understand or embrace the words in them.

This isn’t a head thing. This is a heart thing. This is a sovereignty of God thing. The heart isn’t following where God wants to lead.
 
Natural law is something people apply when they feel like it and ignore when it suits them.
It is objective moral truth, regardless of how well people are able to live in accordance with it. And the prohibition on deliberate subversion of the human sexual configuration is very logical, and also very clear.

To reject it as the foundation for morality is to reject nearly all of the Church’s teachings. It is practically to reject God, who ordained the natural order and who sustains it in every moment that it is.
If I have 6 kids and will die if I have another one, the ONLY sensical, logical, moral thing to do is become sterilized. The very idea that I would not do this because of the idea that “sex was made for making babies” when it is a simple outpatient procedure that would save my life and harm no-one and help my marriage at he same time is absurd. The only thing more absurd is thinking that God would actually have a problem win this.
No. The only sane, logical, and moral thing to do would be to refrain from further sex until your natural fecundity has run its course. It would, in fact, be outrageously immoral to subject yourself to such risk just a few paltry orgasms.

At any rate, the issue is not whether or not you will die for having more children (unless you added new info somewhere that I missed – I have not kept up with this thread very carefully); as you said, the issue is that you want to travel and have a career and so on and you cannot reconcile this with your marital duties. If your marriage suffers, it will be solely because you have elected to prioritize your worldly ambitions and desires and dreams over the duties to which you committed yourself, not because of the Church’s (morally legitimate) prohibition on contraception.

The prohibition on sterilization does not stem from the relative complexity or simplicity of the procedure. It does not exist to make your life easier or more difficult. The God of the Church is not the God of your earthly wants or your material well-being or your sexual satisfaction or your personal convenience. He does not care if you get the chance to write a book or see Europe. He cares if you get to see Him, forever, in Heaven. Any assertion to the contrary is a flimsy rationalization.

The course you are contemplating is contrary to natural law; it is impiety against the Church, which has a legitimate basis for its claim to truth and which commands your deference; it risks scandalizing your husband if he consents to it and it compounds the sin with dishonesty if you do it behind his back. It is folly piled upon folly, and I cannot strongly recommend enough that you rethink your position, since it seems to me that you are pretty intent on embarking on it regardless of what anyone here says.
 
Well, LaSainte, I give you an A. I stand corrected.
[SIGN1]
I apologize for thinking that that which you violently reject you are ignorant of.[/SIGN1]

I will give you an A+ if you can state honestly that you’ve read *Castii Connubi, Humanae Vitae *and Pope JPII’s TOB.
Haha. Thanks 🙂

No A+ for me. I have read some of all of them, but all of none of them. Castii Connubi almost seemed to me to rule out even NFP. And as much as I LOVE PJP2, I thought TOB just laid it on so THICK, like every sexual encounter is some Earth-Shattering event where space and time cease to exist and it’s you and your spouse and God in some divine embrace. I guess he never heard of just having a quickie at 2 p.m. in the walk-in closet while the baby is napping on the bed 🙂 Humanae Vitae is short and sweet but didn’t really tell me anything I didn’t know already.

Maybe I should give TOB another shot. I honestly can see myself doing NFP, but the extreme examples are what et to me about the teaching, as if God would expect a woman to abstain for 25 years or possibly die just because you can’t use ABC prevent the conception of some imaginary child that doesn’t even exist is bizarre to me. That and I hink NFP is really not that different from many other forms of contraception, no matter how many times I hear the arguments to he contrary.
 
Thank you so much :). I am overwhelmed. Excited, but overwhelmed. I HATE taking care of newborns. Sleepless nights, colic, and now I cant even nap with the baby because I have a 2 year old to take care of as well, so say hello to 4 hours of sleep a day for 3 or more months. Did I mention I get PPD something fierce? And that it was a solid year before my son slept through the night? I was a zombie for months, and I would just break down crying and feeling so hopeless, and that was with ONE baby.

I just pray that he’s healthy and happy. I’ll be fine after the first few months I’m sure, and I know that once I lay eyes on my little guy I will love him like crazy (I hope). I just am not one of those women who likes all this stuff, or wants to even LOOK at other people’s babies and kids. I didn’t even like babysitting when I was a teenager.

And I don’t see a medically necessary sterilization as “cutting God out of the equation”. I see it as using the common sense and technology He gave us to try not to die.
My first (now 10) did not sleep the night until 17 months. Consistantly. At around 6 months he would switch it up a bit by sleeping the night 2 times in a row occasionally, then start up with his waking every 1 /1/2 hours.

My second slept the night at 6 weeks, sleeping 14 hours at a time. Might happen with you as well.
 
I disagree. These are just words.

I could recite the Communist Manifesto if I were sufficiently motivated to do so. It doesn’t mean I understand or embrace the words in them.

This isn’t a head thing. This is a heart thing. This is a sovereignty of God thing. The heart isn’t following where God wants to lead.
Ike, if inthought this teaching came from God, all my problems would be solved. This is NOT about me rejecting God. Not at all.
 
Haha. Thanks 🙂

No A+ for me. I have read some of all of them, but all of none of them. Castii Connubi almost seemed to me to rule out even NFP. And as much as I LOVE PJP2, I thought TOB just laid it on so THICK, like every sexual encounter is some Earth-Shattering event where space and time cease to exist and it’s you and your spouse and God in some divine embrace. I guess he never heard of just having a quickie at 2 p.m. in the walk-in closet while the baby is napping on the bed 🙂 Humanae Vitae is short and sweet but didn’t really tell me anything I didn’t know already.

Maybe I should give TOB another shot. I honestly can see myself doing NFP, but the extreme examples are what et to me about the teaching, as if God would expect a woman to abstain for 25 years or possibly die just because you can’t use ABC prevent the conception of some imaginary child that doesn’t even exist is bizarre to me. That and I hink NFP is really not that different from many other forms of contraception, no matter how many times I hear the arguments to he contrary.
Why not try Alice or Dietrich Von Hildebrande? Dietrich actually has similar reasonings as theology of the body…but written in the 1940’s I believe.
 
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