Sudden Death of our 13 Year Old Daughter

  • Thread starter Thread starter MGEISING
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My heart aches for you. I am literally crying with you as I type this. I am so very very sorry for your loss.

Please know that I will pray for your family.
 
We are all with you here at CAF. Please keep posting! Our prayers are with you every single day. I know your suffering is intense. I think it is good for you to try to work, if you can. I’ll keep praying for you.
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
Brava Moe, one day down!!!

Yes, you are going to cry, and at the oddest moments.

Prayers are continuing here…
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Thank you … thank you … I need prayers and encouragement … I am so sad and miss her so (we miss her so)😦
 
RWMorris said:
We are all with you here at CAF. Please keep posting! Our prayers are with you every single day. I know your suffering is intense. I think it is good for you to try to work, if you can. I’ll keep praying for you.
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The pain is unbearable … but we know that we must move forward (not MOVE ON) … that is an oxymoron when you lose anyone.

The pain is so deep … please keep us in prayer … McKayla wants for nothing … we want for her … although aren’t selfish to want her back (maybe we do) … but we know she is eternally happy and is wathcing over us …

THANK YOU CAF… I need support – we need support … please keep Amanda her sister in prayer … Love you all!
 
dranzal said:
Over time, you will find that people avoid the “topic” of your daughter and her death. They either find it uncomfortable personally, or assume you do. You may want to assure those close to you that you will always have some degree of sadness in your soul, but talking about her or even mentioning her name to you is healing rather than hurting. Far more hurtful is the avoidance of her as if she didn’t ever exist. Tell them it is a blessing to hear how she brightened their lives or just to share little memories and stories of her. Your friends will need this “permission” to talk about her, especially later on (months or past a year). And it will bring you joy to know they think of her as well. I share this because it has been our experience.
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I agree with this, it has also been my experience. When people see my son they then ask if he’s my only one and I say no, that I had my little girl but she passed away. I can see it makes people uncomfortable and at times I feel uncomfortable because I don’t say it for sympathy, but because it’s true and she’s my angel, my Saint, being held gently in our Lord’s arms. I find that there are times that I give in and say my son is my only child.

It will be hard for awhile, it’s been almost a year for me and I am still trying to figure out exactly how to talk about my little Gianna. I still cry when I’m alone or am talking about her, but not as much anymore. Prayer is amazing, especially prayer from other people. I can guarantee you came to the right place the people here were wonderful. I know that I am okay today because the Lord held my hand, Our Lady covered me with her mantle and the prayers from the people on CA were heard and answered.

The people here are amazing, I also will be praying for you, your family and McKayla. I will pray that you feel God’s loving arms around you, comforting you and filling you with peace…that’s how I know when I’m getting a hug!
 
I’m so sorry for your loss. The pain must seem impossible to bear. God Bless you and your family.
 
I have finished a book a woman at McKayla’s wake gave me … she didn’t know me … and just celebrated the 1 year anniversary of her daughter’s death on Valentines Day - she was 16 and was killed in a car accident.

It is called Grieving Forward and it is sensational … really puts into terms things that happen and it give me hope that one day - we will laugh again … although of course never forgetting McKayla, always Missing her, who she was, and who she could have been.

I am also reading a Travel Guide To Heavan which is OK … doesn’t give me a sense of peace like Grieving Forward Does.

Anyone out there have any books that will help reading about the Grieving Process?

Thanks everyone … I am ready to embark on day 2 at work … however I am not feeling as strong as I did yesterday … so I am not going to push myself a whole day and I feel bad …

KEEP YOUR PRAYERS COMING PLEASE!
 
Lexee15 said:
The people here are amazing, I also will be praying for you, your family and McKayla. I will pray that you feel God’s loving arms around you, comforting you and filling you with peace…that’s how I know when I’m getting a hug!
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That is beautiful … I feel bits and piece of peace … at night it is the hardest … cried myself to sleep – woke up crying … still haven’t seen our beautiful McKayla in my dreams yet … I long for that … as a pregnant mom longs for her new baby … I miss her and just love and want her in my dreams … God has not given me that yet … I am very sad about that …
 
MGEISING said:
I have finished a book a woman at McKayla’s wake gave me … she didn’t know me … and just celebrated the 1 year anniversary of her daughter’s death on Valentines Day - she was 16 and was killed in a car accident.

It is called Grieving Forward and it is sensational … really puts into terms things that happen and it give me hope that one day - we will laugh again … although of course never forgetting McKayla, always Missing her, who she was, and who she could have been.

I am also reading a Travel Guide To Heavan which is OK … doesn’t give me a sense of peace like Grieving Forward Does.

Anyone out there have any books that will help reading about the Grieving Process?

Thanks everyone … I am ready to embark on day 2 at work … however I am not feeling as strong as I did yesterday … so I am not going to push myself a whole day and I feel bad …

KEEP YOUR PRAYERS COMING PLEASE!
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While it was written about the loss of a spouse, I found By Grief Refined by Alice von Hildebrand to be a great help when my father died.

You are enduring the worst kind of nightmare here on earth, and I’ve prayed for you every day since I read your first post.
I’ve never lost a child, praise God, but I’ve imagined how I would get out of bed each morning and pray for strength should God ever lay that cross on my shoulders.
My your suffering be the salvation of many lukewarm and cold souls who are watching and learning from your faith.
 
MGEISING said:
I have finished a book a woman at McKayla’s wake gave me … she didn’t know me … and just celebrated the 1 year anniversary of her daughter’s death on Valentines Day - she was 16 and was killed in a car accident.

It is called Grieving Forward and it is sensational … really puts into terms things that happen and it give me hope that one day - we will laugh again … although of course never forgetting McKayla, always Missing her, who she was, and who she could have been.

I am also reading a Travel Guide To Heavan which is OK … doesn’t give me a sense of peace like Grieving Forward Does.

Anyone out there have any books that will help reading about the Grieving Process?

Thanks everyone … I am ready to embark on day 2 at work … however I am not feeling as strong as I did yesterday … so I am not going to push myself a whole day and I feel bad …

KEEP YOUR PRAYERS COMING PLEASE!
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Praying that each day you will be stronger.

Stephen Ministries has some good resource books.
 
MGEISING said:
Here is an article on McKayla’s funeral … my husband was magnificent … and he is most probably the best father in this world … his mantra … make memories …

can you cut and paste this? not sure if it will work?

unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Sobbing+friends+mourn+Mont+Vernon+teen&articleId=52dd61c4-197b-4cea-ba32-c8bf8a193f1f
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I was able to read the article, it was lovely. Your are truely blessed with a wonderful husband! I was able to click several links to even more articles about your daughter as well. I hope your family is doing well, especially your daughter Amanda. May God bless and keep you all.
 
BeeSweet said:
I was able to read the article, it was lovely. Your are truely blessed with a wonderful husband! I was able to click several links to even more articles about your daughter as well. I hope your family is doing well, especially your daughter Amanda. May God bless and keep you all.
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Thank you BEESWEET … please keep us in your prayers … our hurt is tremendous!
 
Moe,

I’m glad you were able to return to work, even if it’s for a day or two at a time. I pray your employer and co-worders are supportive.

I don’t know if this is feasible where you work, but it helped me to have a quiet place to go to when I started to feel overwhelmed (not the ladies room). There was a grassy area and woods behind the health care facility where I worked. Sometimes I only needed a few minutes of the quiet and fresh air - other times it took the whole 53 beads of the rosary!!🙂

Praying for your family’s peace.
 
Moe,
I remembered your family in prayer today. Your faith is making you strong even though it must feel like your world has caved in. I can see God blessing you…
One day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time, and our Lord is with us for each tiny bit of time. Lean on Him.
Keep posting. I’m keeping a prayer watch for you and your family.
 
blessedtoo said:
Please read A Grief Unveiled by Gregory Floyd (5 bucks on Amazon). Written by a Catholic father about the sudden death of his son. Truly a transforming book.

I think of you all the time and pray for you ceaselessly. I pray specifically that the Lord will send you that dream you so deperately want.

amazon.com/Grief-Unveiled-Fathers-Journey-Through/dp/1557252157/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/002-4342166-0872050?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1176350645&sr=1-1
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Thank you so much blessedtoo
 
Moe,
I’m praying for you and your family every day. I’m holding your up to God. I hope you can feel the prayers that we at CAF are offering in your behalf.
Did you go to work today? If so, how was it?
Peace,
Lissa
 
RWMorris said:
Moe,
I’m praying for you and your family every day. I’m holding your up to God. I hope you can feel the prayers that we at CAF are offering in your behalf.
Did you go to work today? If so, how was it?
Peace,
Lissa
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Thank you Lissa:

No … I couldn’t get there today … I was physically and mentally exhausted …although I am blessed because my work is behind me 20000% … and I have enough time that I am not losing any money — which most wouldn’t think should be a concern … but I make a good salary … and if I lost it … we truly would feel it …

I do feel the prayers … I think that helps us continue to go on … we miss her so much … she was just amazing.

We are still receiving sympathy cards … we have received well over 1000 cards … and today I received a 5 page letter from McKayla’s Best Friends Mom … and it brought me to my Knees in tears … If McKayla ever knew how much she affected people in her life … she would be very surprised … she had a quiet strength … she was shy, yet confident … and didn’t have a big ego … no ego at all …

I can’t understand why she was taken … but we do trust in the Lord’s plan … although the pain is great and we miss her.

I will go to work tomorrow … even if it is for a few hours … it is my short day … I cry at work … but people are wonderful and just want to be with me and hug me and talk to me … My job I can do blindfolded … so it is a blessing I don’t have to operate on anyone … like one of McKayla’s Mom who is an OBGYN … she had to call a collegue in to decide whether she needed forcepts or not, because she was so distressed …

God is good … can you imagine me operating on anyone? I bearly know how I got to work.

Thanks so much … PLEASE KEEP THE PRAYERS coming … it helps me greatly with people posting … the night time is the worst.

Love Moe
 
Moe,
What kind of person was McKayla? What was her personality like? How is Amanda doing and also your dear husband?
I understand how night time can be the worst. I am praying for you to have a special dream…
Lissa
 
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