Tell an Outrageous Lie about the Previous Poster, Vol. III

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boldlygo drove the getaway car for mVitus and several of his cohorts. I know because I can sleep with one eye open!
 
Nice cake 🙂 May I have a slice?Can you even see it yet?
Joeybaggz lives in the past ,an eccentric desperate man in his 90’s searching for his childhood sweetheart
in his time travelling machine.
 
Hello from the year 1967. My trusty time traveling machine has safely delivered me to L.A. and I have gotten a job as the saxophonist for The Doors. And, drum roll please, Brigitte Bardot has consented to be my bride. Jim Morrison is going to be the best man, we are getting married on the Santa Monica pier, and Greenfields has begged me to be in the wedding party. I think it isn’t so much because she gives a hoot about my coming nuptials, but rather she desperately wants to be a Doors groupie.
 
The now famous member of The Doors discovered Greenfield’s mistake and confronted her. Greenfields in a teary eyed moment admitted the pellets were hers, but mistakenly put them in the bowl of chocolate raisins. She explained that rabbit pellets are the preferred garnish of Brother Gov for his martinis and promptly corrected her mistake. Seeing Brother Gov later after a couple martinis, Greenfields realized how Gov loved his cocktails and she was so pleased the Doors Sax man discovered her mistake and allowed her to correct it.
 
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Contrary to popular belief, the cake by joeybagz’s name is not there because it’s his birthday. It’s because of his recent involvement in a prison break wherein he hid a plastic spork inside. The recent escapee is still trying to figure out how a spork was going to help.
 
mVitus developed the ‘Spork’ .
He is indeed a Spork form the far off world of Sporkania himself but uses an optical illusion outfit and mask to cover his extreamly large head ,and blue visage .
 
The (name removed by moderator) sits in a lonely little train station in the middle of nowhere and at the back of beyond .He’s the station master ,porter and tea lady depending which hat he dons and what time time it shows on his gold fob watch .The train comes through three times a week.
 
Greenfields, aka Hogcalling Sally, works on said train…it’s a very old steam engine, and parts are impossible to find anymore when something breaks…last month, the steam whistle finally bit the dust, so the railroad hired Greenfields to take its place…whenever the train approaches a station or an intersection, the engineer taps her on the shoulder, and she lets loose with an earthshaking “SOOOEEE”…so far, everything has worked well, but there’s one little station,an older one that’s in need of restoration, that trembles every time she lets loose…
 
Boldlygo ,the engineer on the train,has poor Greenfields sitting on top of the trains engine …a rope dangling from her little toe that he pulls when her screech of pain is needed at each intersection.
It’s her only way to travel home to see her bedridden parents as she’s clean broke.
 
Greenfields loves every minute of it…in addition to being a masochist, she also has a foot fetish…she travels home as frequently as possible because her bedroom there is papered with pictures of feet, everything from orangutan feet curled around a branch to barefoot children on a trampoline to dog pawprints in wet cement…her ceiling is covered with footprints which she claims were left there when Fred Astaire rehearsed for the scene in ‘Royal Wedding’…she falls asleep with her head resting on a pair of her old combat boots, surrounded by feet - glorious feet…
 
You’ve got the combat boots part right 😱
Boldlygo dreamed of being just like Fred Astaire ,his favorite pastime was to sit infront of a replica of the actors stage mirror and practice for hours imitating facial expressions and putting on a gruff voice and talking and laughing with himself.
Poor boldly go didn’t get very far with acting school,but he is fondly thought of as 'the little old man with a cane and top hat behind the scenes" as busies himself pulling the curtain cords open and shut for shows.
 
As Boldlygo guides his train through the state of Iowa he fails to note that everytime he makes Greenfields Toe the line as the train’s whistle 1000 or more hogs from around the state begin to follow the train. By the time the train reaches the South Dakota border the train is being followed by at least 250,000 hogs.

The train is stopped at the border by the Iowa National Guard, The Iowa State Police, agents from the National Federation of Hog Farmers, Iowa State Fair officials. and several thousand angry hog farmers.

The pair are arrested and convicted of hog rustling. Boldlygo is given a scoop shovel and ordered to clean up the mess along the tracks back to the Illinois border, and Greenfields made a judge for the hog calling event at the next state fair.
 
Milt. What can we say about Milt?

Milt began his career in investigative journalism at a young age and his first article was published in the St. John’s Elementary Newsletter; Merry-Go-Rounds: Playground Fun or New Age Symbolism? Since then he progressed to MuckTech University and graduated with his BS. You may recognize other articles he’s written as follows. Bigfoot: Cryptid Animal or Hairy Uncle Ted is Back? A Sign of Peace: Hippie Sculptor Puts Holes in Solid Circle, Gets Arrested for Vandalizing Manholes. (and) This Politician Has It: A Story of Finding the Lost Pen.
 
Poor mVitus can not figure out why every time he starts run out gas he has to put a new transmission in his car. R is for reserve is it not?
 
The Legand is that little guy in the grease pit covered in grease.
 
And i am loving every minute of it.
Hogcallin Sally posed for the cover shot,
Milt said:
Greenfields made a judge for the hog calling event at the next state fair.
Click to expand...
of an all nude calendar being shot at said fair.
edit; Greenfield remained fully clothed the rest of the models were of course nude.
 
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Tut tut ,Mr Legend really needs to put on his spectacles ,pull out a map and learn that some places in the world people call hogs…pigs.In the land of On Top there are pigs,wild boar but no hogs 😉
The Legend dreams of pig huntn’ in the Outback and is saving his coins from collecting bottles from the side of the road for recycling.
 
Greenfields said:
pull out a map and learn that some places in the world people call hogs…pigs.
Click to expand...
Indeed hogs, pigs, razorbacks, men that throw their socks in a corner, and motorcycles. 😆

(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)
 
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