Why is the Catholic Church so unfriendly to singles?

  • Thread starter Thread starter happypeacemaker
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Xanthippe_Voorhees said:
Wednesday night is terrible timing…that’s a school/work night. Not surprised it didn’t work.
Click to expand...
I live in the Bible Belt. Wednesday night IS considered “Church Night”. Schools do light or no homework, they do not schedule events and sports teams don’t even practice (except for the pay-to-play travel teams).
 
It’s because most singles are not living holy lives, in today’s world. In both the elders minds and the reality, singles are either having casual sex, contracepting, or living with someone without being married. The Catholic church is all about family life. I don’t feel as if I get treated badly, but I’m actively involved within my church, religious ed, organizations etc…
 
Last edited:
I think it’s the times. I don’t know that the Church has ever been expected to appeal to “singles.” In a way, it may have.
 
I’m a single and I don’t think we get treated bad. It’s just there are so few of us in comparison

It’s kind of like expecting to find a really good Greek restaurant in Japan
 
Last edited:
Interesting. Many of the bars I’m familiar with would not hold 100 people that easily, and some of the coffee shops and diners I’m aware of are pretty huge, regularly have large groups meeting up there, and don’t need reservations, but I guess it just depends on the place.
 
That’s a good point, that there are so few.
 
Last edited:
I think there is one bar in our town that might hold 100ish people, it is a venue where big name acts come to do small shows. They would not be a ToT sort of place!
 
There is a big bar with an outdoor space that hosts a gathering we all attend every year that has well over 100 people at it, but ToT would likely have to compete with some classic rock cover band…
 
Yumm. Ham sandwich!

A. I was the DRE. No. It was held during a normal Mass time. The ‘regular ‘ Mass was occurring in the church.

B. Not really.

C. Perhaps. But since all the materials showed pictures of happy two-parent families, it didn’t come across that way.

D. No, of course not. But you don’t need a signat the door to make people feel excluded.

Regarding funding, sure, the people who wanted to feel welcomed could have started something without funding. But the married couples’ dances, the couples’ retreats, the family Mass potluck’s main dishes were all parish funded. And the family life minister was a full time position.

It didn’t strike me unreasonable at the time that some single people may have felt unwelcome. It still doesn’t. I understand YMMV.
 
Last edited:
DeepDeepTrouble3 said:
I think it’s the times. I don’t know that the Church has ever been expected to appeal to “singles.” In a way, it may have.
Click to expand...
Yeah, I think this is true. In the 2000 years of the Church, typically the only singles were priests, members of religious orders, and widows/widowers.

Most people were married before 20 (or very close to marriage). Most went from childhood to married life without a “bachelorhood.”

But again, as the Catholic Match Institute says, singles ministry in the Church doesn’t work very well, at least as an official ministry of a parish: https://www.catholicmatch.com/institute/2012/06/the-trouble-with-singles-groups/

But I have heard of some independent Catholic Singles Groups



AtlantaCatholicsingles.org

God Bless
 
Tis_Bearself said:
Interesting. Many of the bars I’m familiar with would not hold 100 people that easily, and some of the coffee shops and diners I’m aware of are pretty huge, regularly have large groups meeting up there, and don’t need reservations, but I guess it just depends on the place.
Click to expand...
The bars that I know of in Philly that have ToT have party rooms that can be closed off for private functions.
 
Last edited:
I’ve really seen it vary by parish.

My worst one was the parish that had really three groups:
  • The young adult group
  • The men’s group
  • The women’s group
The women’s group pretty much just did topics on marriage and motherhood. Single women could go, but I really don’t see why I would go talk about the challenges of motherhood. I’m not as sure what the men’s group did.
 
I definitely read that as having casual sex at mass.

I really hope no one is doing that.
 
At least you don’t have all the little old ladies themselves after you.
 
Any one in any group (family, single, senior) can have a preconceived opinion as to how they are treated at church. I’ve never witnessed anyone receiving any special or favored treatment. My guess would be it’s a self-imposed feeling.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top