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Walking_Home
Guest
Ditto – to pianistclare.
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Ditto – to pianistclare.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
It’s totally true. People can be superficial, myself included. In college, my husband wore giant plastic aviator style glasses. His hair was often tousled and he gave off “absent-minded professor” vibe as he wore polos and khakis.Keep looking Mel. Focus on school and work. Everything will work out.
Learn NOW that you cannot plan your life and expect success every time.
What’s that wise saying again? “We make plans, and God laughs?”
Pray for God’s will, no matter what it is, and everything will work out very well.
She likely thought YOU were old school because you dress old school. You’re a nice looking chap. Get some current clothing that blends in more. Regular jeans, regular tees, polos, skip the wide ties. That stuff is trendy, and good for groups that already dig it. Most young girls wouldn’t like it I don’t think, and I have 2 daughters in their 20’s. They’re just not into that, and wouldn’t give you a chance. Not saying that is RIGHT…of course. You have to be yourself. But you’ve already pidgeon-holed yourself.
Just my 2 cents. I’ll sit back now and wait for people to blast me, LOL
After college, his mom set him straight. Try nice wireframe “normal” glasses, more casual polos, vary the color of khaki and trim his hair to a more modern style.
And that is the man I found myself attracted to. Seeing his old pictures I know I wouldn’t have been…he displayed an image, whether he liked it or not, that made him seem both pretentious and aloof.
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pianistclare
Guest
HAHAHAHA! This makes me laugh out loud. As I have said many times before, I “met” Joseph on Catholic SIngles and he had I KID YOU NOT the absolute worst photo in the history of online dating. I wish I had saved it. It was sad and hysterical at the same time.
ETA: Turns out he looks NOTHING like that horrible picture.
ETA: Turns out he looks NOTHING like that horrible picture.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
So funny. I was on and off Catholic Match for years. Hubby had a TERRIBLE picture. Or should I say a terrible set of pictures. They were out of focus, far away, contained him with friends…
After we went back and forth for a bit, I realized I’d seen him at Mass so I had a better idea of his looks. But still. Men get all the credit for being visual creatures, but women still do make major assumptions based on looks.
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Melodeonist
Guest
Well, turns out she isn’t a SSPX as she said she goes to a legit Catholic parish and she’s joining the Legion of Mary. She’s just a very traditional Catholic.
We actually got to talk a ton today because I met her when the meeting ended. First me, her, and the advisor were talking, then it was me and her. We talked about prayer, my St. Benedict cross pin, and other stuff like that. Then when someone told her she had to go (probably SGA meeting), I asked her if she likes bowling, which she replied that she’s not very good. I said I’m not too good either, and I asked her if she wanted to go bowling tonight at 7:30, to which she said she is very busy, but she’d like to put a rain date on it.
Success, or failure?
We actually got to talk a ton today because I met her when the meeting ended. First me, her, and the advisor were talking, then it was me and her. We talked about prayer, my St. Benedict cross pin, and other stuff like that. Then when someone told her she had to go (probably SGA meeting), I asked her if she likes bowling, which she replied that she’s not very good. I said I’m not too good either, and I asked her if she wanted to go bowling tonight at 7:30, to which she said she is very busy, but she’d like to put a rain date on it.
Success, or failure?
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jdavani
Guest
Neither success nor failure. It was just a casual conversation. Also, be sure to ask her out on a date next time. Don’t just say let’s go bowling. Use the word, “date”
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F_Marturana
Guest
Here’s a tip.
Ask a woman out for a couple of days in the future.
Unless it’s for something simple like a coffee.
She seems like a nice young lady.
Ask a woman out for a couple of days in the future.
Unless it’s for something simple like a coffee.
She seems like a nice young lady.
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pianistclare
Guest
I think it doesn’t eliminate the possibility,
SLOW DOWN !
I think you may have a chance. Think about something else for a few minutes, sheesh.
LOL
SLOW DOWN !
I think you may have a chance. Think about something else for a few minutes, sheesh.
LOL
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Theo520
Guest
So what if she’s a ‘sedevacantist’
Talk to her, get to know her, maybe she’s a member because her parent’s are of that belief.
Talk to her, get to know her, maybe she’s a member because her parent’s are of that belief.
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pianistclare
Guest
Mel is highly suggestible.
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Walking_Home
Guest
Honestly – her being involved with a sedevacantist group – would be a red flag.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
You do know how facebook works, right? Just because one has added a group and even posts in it doesn’t mean that one is “involved”.
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Walking_Home
Guest
From what he said – she invited him to a sedevacantist “Traditional” group. So what is he expected to do there. Just hang out – while they go on and on about “modernist” Rome and a vacant See. To me – it’s all fishy.Walking_Home:
You do know how facebook works, right? Just because one has added a group and even posts in it doesn’t mean that one is “involved”.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
Read the whole thing. She added him on facebook, then invited to a group there.Xanthippe_Voorhees:
From what he said – she invited him to a sedevacantist “Traditional” group. So what is he expected to do there. Just hang out – while they go on and on about “modernist” Rome and a vacant See. To me – it’s all fishy.Walking_Home:
You do know how facebook works, right? Just because one has added a group and even posts in it doesn’t mean that one is “involved”.
It’s still on Facebook…not exactly like going to a building with a group. It’s Facebook.
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Walking_Home
Guest
Whether it’s facebook/a blog/ site/ etc – it’s still sede.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
I guess I see a huge difference between attending a group face to face and reading things on Facebook and belonging to a group.
Also, not to be mean but as Clare has mentioned Mel’s dress and general nature may make it appear that he would like that.
It’s just facebook, not a lifelong commitment.
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Walking_Home
Guest
Need to take into account – people can be led into toxic “traditionalism” – by what they read/communicate via the various forms of social media.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
Well, I think that the level of toxicity depends on the person. There are people who are able to keep a level head in the face of error. There are people who find value in learning what others say and do. And remember, that many of those who are traditionalist have no venue for remaining with the church and being sedanctivist behavior, so they may actually point one’s way to legit TLM resources.
That, and the descriptions of facebook groups are often rather flawed.
I’m a part of many facebook groups. One is homeschooling. According to the dscription of the group they “encourage all forms of homeschooling” and specifically state they accept unschooling K12. Which is the idea that kids should learn what they want, and nothing more. Not exactly good or healthy IMO…and honestly, I wouldn’t mind if it was illegal to not have core subjects taught at the Jr/Sr high level.
But in reality, the group is really well-balanced and I’ve get to see one of the 300+ VERY ACTIVE members post a single thing about having highschoolers do anything less than credit-bearing classes. In fact, most parents tend to be extremely particular about ensuring a balanced education.
So my point is that a simple glance at a Facebook group tells you very little about a person or their intentions…it may not even reflect the actual practices of the group.
Even if the group I joined was truly pro extreme unschooling (which I think is fairly toxic in itself) it dosn’t mean that I can’t find value in it.
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Walking_Home
Guest
Homeschooling – like you said – encourages various forms/types of homeschooling. Sedevacantism – on the other hand – encourages people to reject the Popes/ Vat II/ etc. etc. etc.
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Xanthippe_Voorhees
Guest
You missed my point. Unschooling is to Education what Sedevacantism is to the Catholic Church. Judging someone based on a facebook group memebership is a dangerous proposition full of folly.
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