Men - how do you feel about your wife seeing a male physician?

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Homers–I noticed that you are Baptist. I only know a little on the surface about your religion. Is it unacceptable in your faith, for a woman to see a male ob/gyn? I’m wondering if that has something to do with it all, too.

I know that Baptists disapprove of gambling and drinking, etc…so there are some significant differences in how we view every day life occurences, between Catholics and Baptists. Just wondering if this could be one of them.(and thus, your strong aversion to your wife ‘exposing’ herself, to another male doctor)
Like your style. I would say that I am a “Reformed Baptist”, but not over the top, which is to say that religion is the prevailing factor regarding this issue. I just perhaps think an feel that (2) people that claim to “love” each other, owe it to each other be as modest as possible. For example, I consider “love” to be demonstrative, through actions. i.e. - a wife trying to avoid any intimate exposure to another male (doctor), if can be avoided.
 
Didn’t mean to be condescending, I just didn’t want you to be accused of stereotyping or anything else!
Oh yes, no offense taken. I hope I didn’t offend by asking the question to you, Homers. I just know a few people who are Baptists, and they are very strict on certain views, so I wondered if this could be another view that just differs because of religious background and beliefs.

Thanks.🙂

I LOVE your username by the way…very cleva. 😉
 
:nope:
Like your style. I would say that I am a “Reformed Baptist”, but not over the top, which is to say that religion is the prevailing factor regarding this issue. I just perhaps think an feel that (2) people that claim to “love” each other, owe it to each other be as modest as possible. For example, I consider “love” to be demonstrative, through actions. i.e. - a wife trying to avoid any intimate exposure to another male (doctor), if can be avoided.
Fair enough. I don’t think you are alone in your stance, from a male perspective. But, just be careful of putting your opinion on others, that’s all. I’m sure these women on this board ***adore their ***hubbies, and would never intentionally hurt them.:nope: We don’t view seeing a male physician as hurting our hubbies, or violating any intimacies with our spouses. We don’t view this as immodesty, because it’s part of a clinical exam. I don’t pretend to think that NO doctors ever have ‘thoughts,’ but by and large, male doctors are not lusting after their patients.

So it’s safe to say that you feel your wife would be acting in an immodest way by permitting herself to be examined by a male doctor? Immodesty is more of an act of the will, just being clear. When we knowingly dress or act a certain away to attract lustful attention, that is immodesty. So, can you see where some women would take offense here?
 
Homers–you infer here something different though:

Originally Posted by Homers
What have YOU done for your marriage today?

*Whatevergirl, I hope you don’t mind me using your prompt, “what have you done for your marriage today.”

-Wouldn’t all of you ladies like to be able to say to all of your husbands, because I love you so much, and** value our honor and intimacy of the marriage, I chose to protect our intimacy as much as possible. ***

You seem to view that if your wife were to go see a male ob/gyn, that she would be dishonoring the intimacy between the two of you, and I ask…how so? How does not seeing a male physician edify one’s marriage? :confused:
My answer to this question is…by a wife saying that this area of my body is intended just for you, and that only if the absolute need and necessity arises, will I ever need to expose myself to another man.
 
Your wife’s body is intended just for you just like my body is just intended for my husband, however, is my health not more important than the sex of the person performing the exam? Case in point: I went to a female gyno for years, moved, and went to a male doctor. The male doctor, on the very first visit, found something abnormal that required surgery. This is not a testament to their sex, but a testament to their ability. I would hope that if I’d left out the sexes of the doctors in the above information, you would agree that, in this particular instance, the second (male) doctor was better!
 
Your wife’s body is intended just for you just like my body is just intended for my husband, however, is my health not more important than the sex of the person performing the exam? Case in point: I went to a female gyno for years, moved, and went to a male doctor. The male doctor, on the very first visit, found something abnormal that required surgery. This is not a testament to their sex, but a testament to their ability. I would hope that if I’d left out the sexes of the doctors in the above information, you would agree that, in this particular instance, the second (male) doctor was better!
Surely a just as competent female doctor could have diagnosed this? It respectfully sounds like your trying to convince yourself that it was ok to see this male doctor?
 
Sigh, and here I thought we were making progress in this thread.
:hammering:

How is this representative of her marriage, Jackie seeing a male doctor vs a female one???
 
Totally missed the point. I’m not trying to convince myself or anyone else of anything. I’m comfortable with him, but am moving again, so I will need to find another competent doctor, male or female. I, like whatevergirl, thought we were making headway. You were polite and non-abrasive in your recent correspondence with her, but then this reply? Wow. Some things just can’t be explained I guess…
 
I think I’m done with this thread. Homers, you have your opinion and the rest of us recent contributors have ours. Though they differ, they are opinions. My husband and I not only respect and honor one another, but we trust one another to make sound decisions. I will discuss this thread with him tonight. It is interesting to get someone else’s perspective, and I do not wish to convince you or any of the other posters my way is the only way. If this is what works in your marriage, then great. I’m glad you and your wife agree on it. Is it possible for you to, without accusations or JUDGEMENT, admit that the alternative may work for other couples without compromising their vows? There has to be some grey areas some of the time. I’m sure you’ll have fun with that last remark, but I stand by it, you can’t make everything black and white all the time.

As for the rest of you…see you in another thread!
 
Surely a just as competent female doctor could have diagnosed this? It respectfully sounds like your trying to convince yourself that it was ok to see this male doctor?
EH? whats there not to be okay?
There is nothing immodest or inherently wrong in being examined by a doctor, male or female. A doc is a doc… the person is for me sex-less, neutral… whatever.
People in the professional field can be expected to be just that, just like a painter can draw the human body without it being sexual, because art is his work and his gift.

Shalom.
 
Totally missed the point. I’m not trying to convince myself or anyone else of anything. I’m comfortable with him, but am moving again, so I will need to find another competent doctor, male or female. I, like whatevergirl, thought we were making headway. You were polite and non-abrasive in your recent correspondence with her, but then this reply? Wow. Some things just can’t be explained I guess…
CORRECT! I guess some things will never be explained. i.e., why some male doctors “cross the line”, and why some women submit themselves to non-emergent male doctor exams.
 
EH? whats there not to be okay?
There is nothing immodest or inherently wrong in being examined by a doctor, male or female. A doc is a doc… the person is for me sex-less, neutral… whatever.
People in the professional field can be expected to be just that, just like a painter can draw the human body without it being sexual, because art is his work and his gift.

Shalom.
Grace, Shalom back to you as well, however, I do not submit to your point of view. Too many male doctors have crossed the line. A “doc is not a doc”. There are male and female doctors, and most women have a choice. Some women have even become aroused during these type of exams. If you think that the gyn exam is completely clinical, then you definitely need to review the student doctor website posted previously on this thread.
 
How would you feel about your wife “exposing” herself to a female doctor who you find out to be lesbian? Is the issue only with the fact that one doctor has a penis and the other a vagina, or the fact that a male or a lesbian doctor might have impure thoughts about your wife?
 
Homers, so are you worried your wife might become aroused during the exam? One post you say, you are worried that she will be “violated,” now you are speaking of imaginary stats about women becoming aroused? :confused:

I encourage you to seek some spiritual advice and guidance for your fears of your wife possibly straying from you. I think that is more of where this lies for you. I say that to you in Christian charity, please know that. For you to post that about women becoming aroused during ob/gyn exams, it speaks volumes to what “some” of your concerns might be that cause you to be wary of your wife seeing a male physician.
 
I think I’m done with this thread. Homers, you have your opinion and the rest of us recent contributors have ours. Though they differ, they are opinions. My husband and I not only respect and honor one another, but we trust one another to make sound decisions. I will discuss this thread with him tonight. It is interesting to get someone else’s perspective, and I do not wish to convince you or any of the other posters my way is the only way. If this is what works in your marriage, then great. I’m glad you and your wife agree on it. Is it possible for you to, without accusations or JUDGEMENT, admit that the alternative may work for other couples without compromising their vows? There has to be some grey areas some of the time. I’m sure you’ll have fun with that last remark, but I stand by it, you can’t make everything black and white all the time.

As for the rest of you…see you in another thread!
Thank you for this eloqent response. I would be interested in hearing your husband’s view on this matter, if you’d be kind enough to share it with us please. My wife and I also respect each others decisions, but not at the expense of each other or our marriage.
 
I asked him and his exact words are “no problem here.” I am sure you will analyze that and tell me his underlying meaning to the contrary. I take him at his word. There, you asked, I answered. Care to reciprocate?
If my husband ever felt he needed to restrict to whom I “voluntarily expose” myself in a “non-emergent” setting, I would be concerned with why he felt insecure and distrustful of me and my choice in doctors. I would seek answers and counseling in an attemp to resolve these issues. Fortunately, he doesn’t, he isn’t and we don’t need to.
 
Homers, so are you worried your wife might become aroused during the exam? One post you say, you are worried that she will be “violated,” now you are speaking of imaginary stats about women becoming aroused? :confused:

I encourage you to seek some spiritual advice and guidance for your fears of your wife possibly straying from you. I think that is more of where this lies for you. I say that to you in Christian charity, please know that. For you to post that about women becoming aroused during ob/gyn exams, it speaks volumes to what “some” of your concerns might be that cause you to be wary of your wife seeing a male physician.
Women in some of the previous links provided have admitted to becoming aroused during these types of exams. When I hear this, it makes me think of some poor sex starved women who’s husband is possibly never at home, whereby making the exam even more inappropriate than what it already is. No, I am not concerned in the slightest that my wife will stray, as what she and I have is rock solid. We are just cautious when it comes to exposing our selves. i.e., I would never want a female nurse doing a foley on me when she’s not around, or a male nurse inserting a foley on her when I am not present, etc.
 
I asked him and his exact words are “no problem here.” I am sure you will analyze that and tell me his underlying meaning to the contrary. I take him at his word. There, you asked, I answered. Care to reciprocate?
If my husband ever felt he needed to restrict to whom I “voluntarily expose” myself in a “non-emergent” setting, I would be concerned with why he felt insecure and distrustful of me and my choice in doctors. I would seek answers and counseling in an attemp to resolve these issues. Fortunately, he doesn’t, he isn’t and we don’t need to.
Respectfully, why would you ever want to expose yourself in a non-emergent setting?
 
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