pasted on skin tight pants!

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Ecce_homo said:
God Bless you netil(name removed by moderator), I see common sense hasn’t been completely abandoned by good Catholics…

I think so many Catholics have bought into popular culture of feminism at all costs, that they can defend a woman dressing like a prostitute to Mass by puting the blame on the men (which is totally off topic BTW), or the “you’re O.K., I’m O.K.” ideology of “who cares how she dresses there’s bigger fish to fry”… Which reminds me of how NYC reduced murder, rape, and theft… By enforcing the small crimes like graffiti, pot possesion, and shoplifting.
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Thank you, my friend.

I like men, A LOT! 😃
 
BEattitude said:
How can you compare speedos to pants? IF she came in bakini clad you might have an argument here! Your analogy is quite appalling!
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I think that it takes a little more vulgar attire for a female to be bothered by a male’s dress then for a man to loose concentration over a woman’s dress. That is why I used such an extreme example. Although honestly, a very well toned man in tight pants can be very distracting to females also.

Regardless of the example, Marilina’s church had rules and there is nothing wrong or unChristian in politely asking someone to follow the rules and yes, the men should also correct one another.
 
BEattitude said:
How can you compare speedos to pants? IF she came in bakini clad you might have an argument here! Your analogy is quite appalling!
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Well, maybe she was a Liturgical Dancer who just stepped into the wrong church!
 
Ecce_homo said:
I think so many Catholics have bought into popular culture of feminism at all costs, that they can defend a woman dressing like a prostitute to Mass by puting the blame on the men (which is totally off topic BTW), or the “you’re O.K., I’m O.K.” ideology of “who cares how she dresses there’s bigger fish to fry”… Which reminds me of how NYC reduced murder, rape, and theft… By enforcing the small crimes like graffiti, pot possesion, and shoplifting.
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Yes, is that not the case so often? We judge by secular relativism rather than our Catholic faith. Now, if the words of correction were gentle would the “offender” not welcome the words? Why do we not see each other as part of the Body of Christ instead of seeing each other as a stranger who has no “right” to judge my actions?
 
Yes - I totally agree that we should be properly attired for mass. But given the fact that I don’t know this woman’s personal story, I would refuse to pass judgment on a first pass. Now if I saw her there very single Sunday like that, maybe I would say something to an usher or the priest, but to approach someone personally I think is totally rude and arrogant and presumptive. Do you KNOW that she has other close in her closet that would be more pleasing to you? Do you KNOW that she has any idea of the proper attire at your Church? Do you KNOW anything about this woman you chose to demean and embarrass?
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Harsh but I fully agree here.
 
Karin said:
Marilena…
You did nothing wrong…even Father says so.😃
Some posters feel it is acceptable to “bate” you and that is what most posts here are…😦
There is no need to explain yourself (over and over again to this small group of folks) most folks it would seem just dont get it!
But do not feel disheartend MANY of us do get it and can understand your concern, saddness etc!
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:amen:

Brenda V.
 
For the record I’ve corrected a few men in my day who came to Mass unshaven and wearing dirty sweatpants and tank tops. If they were offended by my friendly chiding I don’t really care to be honest they’re big boys they’ll get over it. I’ve never corrected a woman, as a man it’s not really my place and may be taken badly, I’ll leave that to my sisters…

Good job Marilena, if all of us would police our own for all sorts of liturgical abuses, improper dress etc… The Church would be a much better place.

I once went to Mass after a long weekend hiking and had no clothes to change into, I didn’t want to miss Mass so I went to a Church a mile or so off the trail, I received a stern talking to for coming to Mass dirty and unkempt by the usher so I stood in the back and didn’t go into the receiving line, I sat there and took it and was happy that people still care enough to police their Church and get on me for being a slob.
 
deb1 said:
Having a tattoo is not a sin and as long as you don’t have naked women on your arm, I doubt that you are indecent. Just don’t come to Mass in a pair of speedos and you’ll be all right.
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lol. I wear long sleeves to church all year long so not to cause a distraction, but wasn’t sunday readings about the parts of the body of Christ …some apostles, some healers, some with tongues… some of us are not polished carbon copy appearing Catholics. I’m not going to lead a CCD class , but I have and will be a witness to bikers, convicts and the like. We all have our place. Tim
 
Marilena said:
the dress code is written on a large paper for everyone to see.
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So - how many languages is this code written in by the way? Didn’t you say that she didn’t speak English?

I can’t believe how many people are totally missing the point here.

She CAME TO MASS PEOPLE! She didn’t choose to sit in front of the tv eating bon-bons and watching Jerry Springer. She chose to go to mass. Yes, she was not properly dressed, I will agree with that, but to suggest she was not welcome solely because of her attire is just pitiful and sad.

We all crab and complain about Catholic mass attendance being down, but when someone makes an effort they are so nit-picked to death about how they do it, I’m sure many never come again, and find their way into more welcoming “churches”. We are our own demise when we are so far up ourselves that we can’t see the more important part of the picture. Not that she came mis-dressed, but that she came at all.

I see the biggest offense to Christ would have been to stay at home.

~Liza
 
netmil(name removed by moderator) said:
I’m sorry but I want my man to be a man.
If he didn’t gawk at this woman, then become embarrassed in his own special way (God Love him) I would be surprised.

Men were made to reproduce. In nature, they would take the way this woman acted as a sign that she was fertile. Now you expect my man to act like a woman and not read into the signs? His Biology and ability to mate at a moment’s notice is also a Gift from God. We are still mammals and only our reasoning power make us different. Our brains overcome our bodies only with thoughts.
Now I’m not saying that he should be acting on this, but she put herself into the arena of “the near occasion of sin” by dressing this way. “She didn’t know” is not an excuse.
My hubby would have had a lustful thought. It’s nature and it would have been a venial sin. But, who is the one saying the Act of Contrition and who disregarded it? The one place where all men should be able to come WITHOUT that factor, should be our parish.
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Netty, I bolded this, and have bit down on my tongue so hard, I think it is bleeding. Human beings are a species that can discern, make choices, think. If my husband looked at her, I would probably say, so big deal. Would I be upset with the woman for making my man have a lustful thought? Not in this lifetime. I could care less. I know who I am sleeping with tonight. Same when I look at cute blond surfer dude on the tv.:eek: …but I digress. I tend to believe that “men” are capable of controlling their thoughts…but, I think its more that women have a difficult time dealing with it, when their man “gawks” at another woman. That is where the buck stops in my marriage. It doesn’t phase me in the least if he looks. There are bigger battles to get my panties in a bunch over. Why the lowdown on women? As a woman, I wouldn’t have a problem saying to the men, “hey boys, you just received communion, eyes front!” I don’t play second fiddle to a man, never have.

The OP is letting the priest handle it. Sounds like a great plan, this is what works for her and her church. I’m not into the veil, and gunny sack dressing, neither do I think a strapless sundress is appropriate for mass. All things in moderation is more my style. It is the custom of her church to dress in a certain way, I would respect that if I attended her church.

Marilena…take care, ok. Your church, your customs.

Juli
 
Much earlier I posted a tongue in cheek response to this thread, which looks to have been somewhat misinterpreted.

The upshot is maybe we should have a policy for this eventuality.

I do not think I would have said anything at church, but sometimes I DO things like Marilena did. I have been known gently to ask pointed questions, like do you think you should hit your child? or to ask children not to run their bare paws through the unwrapped contents of the bulk bins at the grocery store when no parent is in sight.

I can understand why Marilena did it. She thought the woman MUST be unfamiliar with the rules. GIven that the man reacted mildly and the woman didn’t speak English, I don’t think any harm was done.

Nevertheless this highlights an issue we have not dealt with as a whole, what do we do when some outrageous unCatholic behavior occurs at church during mass?

I vote the usher handle it, whatever it is. Yesterday at my church in the third row, a man’s cell phone went loudly off for quite a while and then he answered it and started talking to someone! We could hear the whole conversation. The usher went over to him and asked him to step outside.

So far so good, but what do we do when a woman shows up in hot pants and a tube top? We should have a policy. What should it be? Have a supply of robes? Have the usher give them a mumu?

Ideas anyone?
 
Julianna said:
Netty, I bolded this, and have bit down on my tongue so hard, I think it is bleeding. Human beings are a species that can discern, make choices, think. If my husband looked at her, I would probably say, so big deal. Would I be upset with the woman for making my man have a lustful thought? Not in this lifetime. I could care less. I know who I am sleeping with tonight. Same when I look at cute blond surfer dude on the tv.:eek: …but I digress. I tend to believe that “men” are capable of controlling their thoughts…but, I think its more that women have a difficult time dealing with it, when their man “gawks” at another woman. That is where the buck stops in my marriage. It doesn’t phase me in the least if he looks. There are bigger battles to get my panties in a bunch over. Why the lowdown on women? As a woman, I wouldn’t have a problem saying to the men, “hey boys, you just received communion, eyes front!” I don’t play second fiddle to a man, never have.

The OP is letting the priest handle it. Sounds like a great plan, this is what works for her and her church. I’m not into the veil, and gunny sack dressing, neither do I think a strapless sundress is appropriate for mass. All things in moderation is more my style. It is the custom of her church to dress in a certain way, I would respect that if I attended her church.

Marilena…take care, ok. Your church, your customs.

Juli
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Why are you biting your tongue?

And please, I’m asking on board, it is not so hard to cut and paste a person’s name. I’m not netty. I’d appreciate it if you used my full screen name or just don’t put a name. You quoted me anyway so people can see who you are talking to.
 
From reading thru this thread—it seems that people are being raised above God. It is no longer about offering to God the proper respect (in our demeanor and clothing)-especially in His house—but about not “offending” someone by taking them aside and explaining to them the appropriate attire for Mass.
People are becoming the primary----God is the secondary.
 
shirleytowers said:
So far so good, but what do we do when a woman shows up in hot pants and a tube top? We should have a policy. What should it be? Have a supply of robes? Have the usher give them a mumu?

Ideas anyone?
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Earlier someone said the Vatican uses shawls. Tied around the waist or shoulders should do.

Heck if it were my church, I would volunteer to crochet them.
 
lizaanne said:
So - how many languages is this code written in by the way? Didn’t you say that she didn’t speak English?

I can’t believe how many people are totally missing the point here.

She CAME TO MASS PEOPLE! She didn’t choose to sit in front of the tv eating bon-bons and watching Jerry Springer. She chose to go to mass. Yes, she was not properly dressed, I will agree with that, but to suggest she was not welcome solely because of her attire is just pitiful and sad.

We all crab and complain about Catholic mass attendance being down, but when someone makes an effort they are so nit-picked to death about how they do it, I’m sure many never come again, and find their way into more welcoming “churches”. We are our own demise when we are so far up ourselves that we can’t see the more important part of the picture. Not that she came mis-dressed, but that she came at all.

I see the biggest offense to Christ would have been to stay at home.

~Liza
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She was dressed like a hooker and was wrong period, had she walked into a 1st century Church they would’ve tossed her out on her ear for defiling the Lord like that.

You have it backwards, the reason why Mass attendance is low is because we’ve largely apostacized and bought into the secular ideology of “you’re O.K. I’m O.K.” like you are professing here.

It’s a fact that more orthodox Parishes are flouroushing compared to liberal parishes. And the orthodox parishes are flourishing because they havea line in the sand of what’s right and wrong, and not all this confusion you get out there.
 
yes, she came to Mass, and yes that was good. yes, she doesn’t speak english according to the guy that was with her.
i don’t understand why you think was rude when i was not rude. not by a long shot. i wasn’t even sanctimonious either.
i never reprimanded her or ridiculed her in front of anyone. iwas not uncharitable to her at all. as soon as the guy told me she does not speak english, i spoke to him, and told him the dress code, and i politely showed to her the dress code by pointing to my veil and my skirt. she got it believe me, and she laughed it off like it was a good joke. at no time was i ever rude to her at any second.
 
netmil(name removed by moderator) said:
Not at my parish.
We need more room!
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same here. Mass attendance is so high at our church that people have to sit on the stairs near the doors of the chapel. the stairs are inside the church, as the doors open to the chapel and even then, the main doors are open in summer and sometimes people pack it so much that they stand just near the doors that go outside. this happens at the early Mass, and at the later Mass
 
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