Responses to Unwelcome Comments on Family Size

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Just remember all of us who can’t have more children (we could only have four) and desperately wish that we had a bigger family.
Maybe that will innoculate you against rude comments. My friends all had five, six, seven, eight, and nine children.
I’m still so jealous!:confused:
 
agapewolf said:
From a single person (hopefully to be married someday with lots of kids)…

Hearing about all of the rude comments makes me wonder if I can somehow be a friendly voice of encouragement.

Can any of you advise me about how I can show support with a friendly comment to those with larger families?

I mean, saying something like “I think its great that you have a lot of kids” sounds so trite… I mean, big families should be more normal anyway.

Or should I just mind my own business?
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Try giving them a big smile, a nod and this 👍

They’ll get it!
 
The one I never mind hearing is, “You sure have a lot of blessings!” That always makes me smile, and I know it is really meant because so few people say it.
 
Maaaaan, I cannot wait to start having my dynasty!

Course, I need a husband first. 😊 Hehe.

But these comments are great, I’m in the library and I’m LOL and I don’t care!👍
 
I usually say something along the lines of “You have a beautiful family!” 🙂
 
I just put this in another post. But it applies here too.

We haven’t been able to have kids yet. So, of course we don’t get the remarks. But we DO know how to comment in reverse.

When people tell us they have too many kids, my favorite line is: “Too many kids!?!?! GREAT! Which one(s) can we have?” Silence usually follows :yup:
 
A friend of mine wanted another child and although we never talked about it, I think she is having second thoughts on ABC with her husband. She wanted another child and told her husband - who is TOTALLY not Catholic - that these are the terms - you will have to use ABC.

To make a long story short - he was “irresponsible” and she got pregnant.

I was so happy for her, but told her via my wife - lifestyles are expensive - kids aren’t.
 
I started getting the rude comments when we found out that my second pregnancy was twins! I was mortified that people said stuff on a second pregnancy like it was soooo horrible that we were going from 1 to 3 kids in one pregnancy. By the time I was pregnant with my 4th people asked if I was going to quit if I finally had my girl. I told them I had a girl already even if she was now her twins guardian angel. I did get to use the “Yes, and we like it!” to my old boss. He asked if we knew what caused it in front of a bunch of people so I figured he deserved any embarrassment he felt! Now I just smile and say, “We are so blessed”

I love the responses … perfect timing too, we are expecting our 6th and haven’t told anyone yet. Time to start working on the responses!!!
 
As far as myself, I get comments from my fellow males who think that I’m nuts that I would like at least five children. I don’t get as hurt as some people may get, so I kid around with the guys to where it will challenge their manhood
What are you AFRAID of a few kids?

My uncle raised 8 children in a 3 bedroom home. Your whining about 2 kids? What are you a WHIMP?

Or my favorite:

Your wife wouldn’t be afraid of having more children if you wouldn’t be afraid of a diaper.
 
Last night I met up with an old school friend at a party and she made some comments about us having three boys, having our hands full etc. I told her that we wanted to even it up with some girls and she replied that I was a glutton for punishment. So I dug deep and tried to remember a witty CAF suggestion and came up with “Yes, well we actually like our children.” big cheeky grin The look on her face was priceless. :eek: Stunned mullet. She was literally speechless…thanks for the ideas! Can’t wait till someone else bails me up…might try out a different line each time. 😛
 
frleo said:
It’s been great reading your comments. :clapping: I cover three parishes in Eastern Montana. In the largest parish, we have just over 80 registered households.

Some of you may remember Monsigner Murnion who died last Fall. His dad had two brothers who moved to Jordan, Montana in 1914. I’ll look at just one brother, John, who had, I think 9 kids, the next generation continued the tradition. Just from John’s kids who stayed in Jordan: Coleman 16 kids, Philip 9, Clarke 6, Barnard 5 (I think I remember the numbers right).

The next two generations (those having kids today) includes 1 family of six kids (oldest 15 - youngest 2, still the possibility for more), and several with 4 or 5 kids and many just starting out. There are a few other (non-Murnion) famlies who also have serveral kids as well. I’ve been in the parish for 6 years and have married some of these folks and baptized 3 of their children. (We average a baptism or a profession of faith every 6 weeks)

Imagine having only 80 families, but 25 kids under the age of 5 and about the same amount in K-6 and 8-12. I am sure there are several parishes with 800 familes that do not have 250 kids under age 5. :tsktsk: Half of the kids born in Garfield County (pop 1200) are Catholic. At that rate we will do like Todd suggested

Thanks again for your comments. It’s great to see people open to God’s creation in thier lives.

:blessyou:

BTW if any of you feel out of place, there is a lot of room in Garfield county, :hmmm: but I’m afraid I’ll have to add on to the church or have two Masses in Jordan which may cause problems with my other two parishes. Or you could come to one of the other two parishes and help lower or average age. The second largest of my three parishes, 70 miles away, with just under 80 families averages between 1-2 baptisms a year and most of those are people “coming home” to have their child baptized where the grandparents live. We have a lot of room there for more people. Montana is great.

OK, enough of the Chamber of Commerce announcements. Thanks for your witness.
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Fr. Leo, maybe a few boys on this board will become priests. then they can come help you out. 👍 (I like this little dude today)
 
deb216 said:
I read this and weep. After a terrible first pregnancy and terrible second pregnancy, hubby convinced me to have my tubes tied. During the next 12 years, I became a better Catholic, he converted and we both deeply regret that decision. We just can’t afford to fix it. 😦

Here is to big families. You are truly blessed.
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😦 A huge hug going out to you.

Kim
 
I’m fond of the “We’ll stop when we get an ugly one” retort.

But now, I think I’m going to alternate that one with the “Thank God, you can see them, too?” comment.
 
My Dad (Father of a Handful of Boys) had this joke:

An expectant woman with four in tow is questioned by the grocery checker: Mam, are these all yours? Yes. Mam, have you heard of family planning? Beaming, she replies: Yes, and we’re halfway there!

My Aunt was expecting their 8th (in 20 years) at about 42 yrs old. Someone asked her: Well, was this one a surprise? Pertly, she replied: They were all surprises, but welcome!
 
Dakota_Maverick said:
http://img413.imageshack.us/img413/789/bigboat2lightersamplejj2.png
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Hopefully true for some…but my dh is a home-care assistant and several of his elderly clients have 5, 6 or more children…who hardly ever visit, lots of grand-children who never call…One dear lady is now 78 and had 10 children, all still alive and between 35-55…NONE OF THEM bother to visit, and she only hears from the grand-children (20+) maybe once or twice a year! It’s scandalous…

Anna x
 
The best part for me is when I’m out with my Mom, all my sisters (four of them) and my (much younger) youngest brother. People have come up and said, “Oh, how nice, you finally had a little boy after all those girls!”

To which my mom replies, “Yeah, we left his other four brothers at home.” 😃

I also like to tell people that my family has enough to field two basketball teams: a boys’ and girls’. 😛
 
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