St. Monica pray for us! Praying for our husbands....

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PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

the conversion of my husband, healing and salvation of our marriage, and the strong faith of our son, the conversion of all sinners in our families and of the spouses being prayed for here by CAF members,

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.

Amen.
 
Hello ladies, I hope everyone is doing well & good & better.
I spoke to my wife today in a courtroom. It wasn’t much, but I lovelingly said, it has been six months since we’ve spoken, I think it’s time we speak today. A few minutes later I approached her again and politely handed her a check towards the mortgage and asked her again, if you want to speak to me I will be waiting outside this door. I went and sat down about 25 feet from the door and read some notes I had thought might help my day. About 10 minutes later I walked back to the courtroom and she was already gone. She snuck out without a peep.

What type of person am I dealing with? A theft, a divorce scam, no words why, no discussion ever again. This is someone totally under mind control and so disconnected from her own spirit. Why does somebody like her get married, just for money? I don’t get it. It’s so sad to me. I can’t discuss making up and I can’t even discuss divorcing her.

Anyway, I’ve been feeling better (in the head), less angry with her even after today. I’ll keep working the spiritual program and thank you all for your past words of kindness.
 
HalfOfAWhole, I’m sorry to hear how difficult things are for you, and glad you’re trying to keep afloat and trusting in God. She probably feels there’s nothing to say and wonders why you’d want to. If she doesn’t want to be a friend, that can’t be elicited even if you try. It’s good that you did the Christian, the loving thing, but it’s probably less likely to blow up in your face if you leave it now to her. I guess you already pray for her which is probably the best you can do for her now.

May God continue to help you.

St Monica please intercede for all these mothers and their husbands and families.

Jesus flood Your blessings on us.
Mother Mary please intercede for us.
 
Erazo, how’ve you been? :hug1:
HalfOfAWhole said:
Hello ladies, I hope everyone is doing well & good & better.
I spoke to my wife today in a courtroom. It wasn’t much, but I lovelingly said, it has been six months since we’ve spoken, I think it’s time we speak today. A few minutes later I approached her again and politely handed her a check towards the mortgage and asked her again, if you want to speak to me I will be waiting outside this door. I went and sat down about 25 feet from the door and read some notes I had thought might help my day. About 10 minutes later I walked back to the courtroom and she was already gone. She snuck out without a peep.

What type of person am I dealing with? A theft, a divorce scam, no words why, no discussion ever again. This is someone totally under mind control and so disconnected from her own spirit. Why does somebody like her get married, just for money? I don’t get it. It’s so sad to me. I can’t discuss making up and I can’t even discuss divorcing her.

Anyway, I’ve been feeling better (in the head), less angry with her even after today. I’ll keep working the spiritual program and thank you all for your past words of kindness.
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It sounds like you did the right thing. I’m glad that your anger has lessened and you’re drawing nearer to God during this difficult time. :hug1:

:crossrc: Praying for everyone.
 
I’m still praying for all us ladies on this thread (and 1/2). Please keep me and my family in your prayers, too. God have mercy on us all. Amen.
 
What a beautiful thread. Ladies (and a few gentlemen, it seems), please allow me to introduce myself. I have been married for 21 years and have two children ages 20 and 18. My dh and I were raised in Protestant homes but neither one was practicing any kind of Christianity when we met and married. I started back to church when my ds was little and it was a twelve year struggle until dh converted his heart and joined the Protestant church with us. Long story, but over the past four or five years, dh has lost faith. We’ve been attending mass for almost a year and I would dearly love to convert to Catholicism. I’ve been waiting for him to take the lead, though, but losing heart.

We have struggled in so many areas of our marriage and this afternoon, dh came home from work, packed a bag and told me he was “going away for the weekend.” Our youngest, dd, left for college last weekend and I am emotionally vulnerable. I’m feeling very abandoned by him, very angry, very hurt. I’m trusting God and praying for dh’s conversion. Please pray for us.
 
CSandy said:
What a beautiful thread. Ladies (and a few gentlemen, it seems), please allow me to introduce myself. I have been married for 21 years and have two children ages 20 and 18. My dh and I were raised in Protestant homes but neither one was practicing any kind of Christianity when we met and married. I started back to church when my ds was little and it was a twelve year struggle until dh converted his heart and joined the Protestant church with us. Long story, but over the past four or five years, dh has lost faith. We’ve been attending mass for almost a year and I would dearly love to convert to Catholicism. I’ve been waiting for him to take the lead, though, but losing heart.

We have struggled in so many areas of our marriage and this afternoon, dh came home from work, packed a bag and told me he was “going away for the weekend.” Our youngest, dd, left for college last weekend and I am emotionally vulnerable. I’m feeling very abandoned by him, very angry, very hurt. I’m trusting God and praying for dh’s conversion. Please pray for us.
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Welcome CSandy – sorry you’re here but glad you’re here. 😉

You’ll be included in everyone’s prayers I’m sure. It’s a nice little “family” here. :hug1: Praying for you now. :crossrc:
 
CSandy,

You’re in the right place! We’re all struggling hear but greatly support another and pray for one another’s needs. My husband has done the same thing in the past. He’s Lutheran while the kids and I are Catholic. It’s a struggle, definitely. But, the Lord will see you through this. Remember - He, too, knew what abandonment felt like when none of his apostles were with Him as He hung from the cross! Nice, huh? I know that He will comfort you - just ask Him. I try to do this myself. You you will be in my daily prayers and rosaries. God bless you and know that WE care about you and will not abandon you.
Much love,
Judi
 
I am so proud of you Half…with such class, you gave her the benifit of the doubt. Even with this, she was unable to see you were reaching out to help her. But it was clear that she got what she wanted and left.

Factually the signs are clear…she does not want help, and you are finally being lifted of the enormous pain.

For this i am so pleased that God has lifted thiseven slightly…

Lana
 
Bless you all, with your struggles and your good hearts. This is one of the loveliest places in the Forums.

St Monica please intercede for all these mothers and their husbands and families.

Jesus flood Your blessings on us.
Mother Mary please intercede for us.
 
Father, in Jesus’ name, have compassion on the good will, the struggles and sufferings of those who post here, and delight in their joys…and please hear and grant their prayers.
 
Hello everyone,

Thought it was high time for me to check in again.

Things with DH are definitely moving in the right direction now. I have moved back into our bedroom after we finished the drywall, texture, and paint. DH is building new closet doors and they are ready for a coat of paint and we are going to add crown molding. New carpeting installed and the room looks fantastic! I truly feel more calm and at peace with our relationship. Everyday is easier and easier as we are relearning our communication skills. Today proved we are capable of conveying our thoughts and needs very well.

Things for us are great and now DD is presenting a whole new set of issues to deal with. Today is her sixth birthday and we found ourselves having to implement “comando” parenting. At her young age she has become very rude and disrespectful especially to me, and throws unbelievable temper tantrums. I very reluctantly planned a birthday party for her. I say reluctant because her behavior has been to the extreme for the past two weeks. I found myself feeling like throwing her a nice party, inviting family and friends was something that was, in a sense, rewarding her for behaving badly. Day before yesterday, I told her that she was working her way to having her party cancelled if her behavior didn’t improve greatly. I told her she needed to speak with kindness and stop being rude at all times and the tantrums needed to stop. It didn’t phase her. She continued the behavior, and I rationalized for and against the party, waffling between whether I should or shouldn’t have it.

Today at mass her behavior was awful. She talked constantly to the point I have no clue what Fr.'s sermon was, she figeted above and beyond normal childhood figeting (I’ve raised three children already, so I know), she sassed and was disrespectful when I asked her to settle down and be quiet. DH was so angry, he didn’t go to communion. Said he didn’t feel it was right to be harboring so much anger to receive.

When we got home it continued to escalate. An hour and 1/2 before the party, DH looked at me and said, “I think we should cancel this. She needs to understand once and for all this isn’t acceptable.” I agreed and grabbed my cellphone, went to the camper and began making calls and cancelled the party. DD was very upset, and we made her come downstairs and we explained why we cancelled the party and what we will be expecting from her from now on. DH did most of the talking which was good because I have been the one to do most of the explaining and now it was coming from daddy. I enforced her need to remain attentive so she would understand. We made sure she explained to us in her words what was going on and what we expect. After about a 1/2 hour, she was smiling and playing and being happier than she has been in a long time.

Later in the day, our oldest DS called me because our 26 yo DD called him upset and basically angry with her dad and me for cancelling the party. So now our parenting is being judged by someone who is just now a parent herself. Our DGD is 9 months old. I’m upset that she has no empathy for what we are dealing with even though she has witnessed her baby sisters bad behavior first hand

With this ridiculously long post and explaination of what’s going on here, I’ll finish by asking you all to pray for our perseverence, and strength to continue to do the right thing so we can get our beautiful DD to a place where she can be happy and balanced. Please also continue to pray for our older DD that she will find some compassion and understanding for our situation.

AND if you think we have collectively lost our mind and have done irreparable damage to our 6 yo DD let me have it. I’m still feeling guilty for cancelling the party even though I know we had to do something drastic.

As always, I continue to pray for all of you, your spouses and your families. May God bless and guide you in your daily lives.
 
Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement. Dh returned home on Saturday and we talked most of the rest of the weekend. It was up and down but God is working.

Please pray for me that I will not allow discouragement to take hold. I pray that I will turn to God for my needs and let Him be my defender, instead of expecting dh to suddenly “get” what he’s never understood in 24 years.

I prayed for all unbelieving spouses this morning. St. Monica, pray for us!

Blessings,

Sandy
 
I am so grateful to find these posts. I am currently praying a Novena to St. Monica using the prayer already posted to this thread. I started this Novena before seeing these posts, so I feel blessed to see these words. I am praying the novena for healing of my marriage and conversion of my husband (as well as a few other family members). I am constantly praying that my husband will become Catholic, so that we can have a shared faith, for his soul, and for consistency in our family while raising our children. My husband was not raised with any religion and struggles with his faith. Before we got married he took classes, but decided not to join the Catholic church. He promised hw would go to church with me even if he wasn’t Catholic. He has chosen to forget that promise. I feel very sad that he will not join me. I stuggle often with how to help him find his faith. I pray constantly that God will show me how I can help. I try not to be pushy (I agree with the words of the member who alraedy posted about not pushing too hard)… So I pray and pray and pray. I ask all of you to join me in prayer for my husband and our family. We are in need of healing and I feel it begins with a united faith in our home… I am praying for all of you too…
On the NFP note… my husband simply will not entertain this topic and insists on condoms or “pulling out”… I have talked to my priest in confession about this. He told me that since my husband is not Catholic, he is not held to this “rule” and I am not commiting a mortal sin by going along with this… He said that fighting over this issues would be worse. I was so relieved after talking to my priest. I have “let go” of this issue and leave it up to my husband to initiate any contraception. God Bless all of you… I am so happy to have found this site of believers to share with!
 
mom4truth said:
Ladies:

I’m really in a pickle. I would like to leave dh. I have tried for 21 years to be a good wife/mother. I have done nothing immoral (I have a clear conscience). Yet, dh continues to hurt me emotionally…cruel words. As you probably know through my other posts, I have a few severe illnesses. DH makes fun of them and tells me I make them up or that I use them as excuses to not have to do anything. (That’s why I’ve had several surgeries…I made them up!) Anyway, I have talked to several priests. They all say keep praying. I just can’t. I don’t want to pray for him anymore. My children are hurting terribly. I don’t have the strength to keep fighting for the marriage. But, I have no means of supporting myself nor the kids. I don’t think that if I left him he would take care of any of us financially. He’s very self-centered. He is certainly not the man I married. I don’t know why he has changed so much. Please, I ask all of you to discern what I should do…not that there’s much I can do. I need something to hold on to … some piece of hope. Thanks, girls! Praying for all of you. 😦 😦
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Hi Mom4Truth, I’m Katie and I just read this post and it reminded me of my dh and I. You may have read some of my posts on other threads. We have been married since we were 18 for 31 years now. It has always been a struggle. I have an auto-immune inflammatory disease called spondylitis. So I have had spinal disc problems since I was 16 and surgery on my neck. My dh tells me that I cause my discs to herniate because I don’t just ignore it and he implies that I just want attention. He has even imitated (in front of my boys)how I walk so weird and slow when my low back discs are herniated. I have a temper and when he is mean to me which is almost every single day about different things I cannot stop myself from telling him or yelling at him that he is mistreating me and so on. He is not Christian or Catholic and my boys are grown and on their own now. Both are atheist. I came back to the Church after 27 yrs. and now all I want to do is talk about my faith. It is so lonely. I had a young friend who is gone to be a missionary now and we used to pray the rosary together, she would read the Divine Office to me cuz I can’t due to my neck being so bad. We would talk about our faith constantly. I miss her so much. I pray for my family but then I don’t cuz I think it is hopeless. I told my boys about Christianity when they were growing up but they have no example to remember and I did not baptize them. My dh doesn’t want me to talk about my faith ever. I did in the beginning and went overboard cuz I couldn’t help it I was so excited. I go to confession all the time and confess the fighting with dh but I have never talked to my confessor about how mean my dh is cuz it would sound like I’m blaming my sins on him in confession. I have said once that I yelled and lost my temper cuz my dh was so mean to me. Then I felt bad for saying that cuz the priest didn’t say anything. I have thought about leaving my dh when I’m sooo mad at him but I know I never will. I even had our marriage convalidated in the Church when I came back to the faith cuz I really believe that marriage is a sacrificial love and a sacrament before God for life. I feel hopeless though because marriage is my vocation and my priest told me that my job was to get me and my dh to heaven and so far I am failing miserably. I guess I will continue confessing these sins but I don’t know how to control my anger. I have other problems too and I go to a psychologist. She gives me advice but it doesn’t work when I am so mad. Sorry this is so long but I just needed to tell talk.
 
Dear onmyknees,

I am feeling really badly for you right now. Chronic illnesses can put a nasty spin on a marriage if one partner doesn’t understand the difficulty of the sick person. You’re in the same boat as me. I understand completely. Please don’t give up praying for your dh and boys. Your suffering may very well get them to heaven! (Even if they don’t convert in this “lifetime” that you know of.) God has a strange way of working things out - like getting your family to heaven. As far as you losing your temper…well…that sounds like me, too! I talked to my priest/confessor before about this and he said I have every right to be ticked off. It’s called righteous or justified anger - which is NOT a sin he said. When a person as wronged you (sinned against you) it is o.k. to be angry. We are not condemning that person. In the end, God will have His just punishment/reward. So don’t be too hard on yourself about that one. I think you need to explain to your priest what your dh says so that he will understand why you said what you said. I’ve thought the same things as you - confessing my husband’s sins…not so. Anyway, feel free to PM me. I will be praying especially hard for you! You are loved! God bless you.
Much love,
Judi
 
Praying for everyone here – may God bring comfort and peace as we confidently pray to Him and for St. Monica’s intercession for spouses and children. :crossrc: :grouphug:
 
I am sad to read of the emotional abuse you have been going through. (onmyknees & mom4truth). While I do not have a physical illness, I am also dealing with emotional abouse. WE have been married for a little over 7 years and now have 2 small children. I look at my children and feel like I have to try to “fix” things… I just don’t know if I can. He agree to a retrouville marriage weekend (shocking that I actually got hime to say YES -took a very long time!). We leave tomorrow for the weekend. i am hopeful, but concerned that the weekend will not offer the tools to deal with this kind of problem. I have mentioned in confession losing my temper as well, but have not known what I should say about the circumstances. I too can not just take the emotional abuse. I may react too much, but I find that if I try to “hold it in”, I feel physically week and even more depressed… It finally comes out but worse than ever! I am working on keeping my responses calm, firm, and fair. I want my children to know that how he treats me is wrong. I worry that he may be a bad influence… (Studies show behaviors repeat themselves)… I feel that I must show them right from wrong, even if it is their Dad doing the wrong. Thanksfully things have been better for the last couple of days, but I do know that it usually is a cycle… Good days and bad days. Sadly I am defining a good day as getting along… Even on a good day he is not one to show much warmth and love… on tht physical illness support issue - I get that too… While I have no serious chronic problems, I have some minor issues with my feet and have had c-sections and a surgery a few years ago. I saw first hand that my husband did not have the capacity to be supportive. I remember a few days after my c-section him complaining that the house wasn’t clean enough or that I hadn’t put away laundry. When my feet were at their worst, I asked for a couple of days to rest them (he would need to watch the little ones). He refused to give that to me. The odd thing is I still love him so much and pray for his conversion and healing of our marriage. That being said, I have been so frustrated by this issue and often wonder why my prayer has not yet been answered. I know I must respect God’s time, but it is hard. I find myself jealous of families that have a united faith. I am trying to control that jealousy… It can be hard. Although I was raised Catholic, most of my family shows no religious values. That is so hard and “lonley” On a bright note - my two children (4 and 2) are already showing signs of loving the Lord. They like to pray and know that they are two of my greatest blessings. They enjoy activities around the church. I pray that God will give me the skills and wisdom to raise them properly so that they will always know Him.

Finally I pray for the those in this thread struggling with the faith of their spouses, children, and all family members and neighbors. May the Holy Spirit open their hearts and minds to feel the love and calling of the Lord… St Monica, please pray with us for the conversion of these hearts. Please pray that all of these families will be healed of the pain they are going through and soon find God in the center of all they do… May the gifts of the Holy Spirit be granted to all of these families and welcomed with open arms…

God Bless you all!
Love,
PJ
 
MY HUSBAND is 10 hrs away and we have been separated for about 5 yrs now.
our 11th wedding anniversary is coming up in Nov.
He goes to the public library where he lives to email us.
Tuesday he got online and told us he had not eaten all day and had 2 dollars to his name. He was going to the bathroom and getting sick while he was at the library.
when I was with him for 5 days this summer while we had time together so the kids could be with him, I "loaned " him 100 dollars.
I did not offer anything on the computer to help, as I went through 5 days of being way too giving to him and it seemed to drain me emotionally. I feel like he can;'t see there is help available, and his teeth are broken and rotting . He is only 35.
I know God is in charge,
His name is Brian, please keep praying.
I am J.
By the way, I joined catholic cupid, a dating site .
If he is still blaming me for the marriage not working( he talked like that on the trip, and said we cannot get along to live together) then I thought well, maybe I ought to be open to meeting others. This time I would love to be with a believer. . Brian is not christian, he is wiccan.
making it all harder.
he has no hope, that belief system, whatever it gives him, offers no hope to him of healing or miracles or anything better!
 
PattyJane said:
He agree to a retrouville marriage weekend (shocking that I actually got hime to say YES -took a very long time!). We leave tomorrow for the weekend.

On a bright note - my two children (4 and 2) are already showing signs of loving the Lord. They like to pray and know that they are two of my greatest blessings. They enjoy activities around the church. I pray that God will give me the skills and wisdom to raise them properly so that they will always know Him.
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I’ve heard great things about Retrouvaille, I hope it goes well for you!

How wonderful that your kids already love God. Stay strong in your faith for their sakes and for your DH’s sake. It’s not always easy (and often very difficult) but you must – if you don’t show them the way to the Lord, who will?

Praying for you and EVERYONE here. :crossrc: :grouphug:
 
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