Strong Desire to Attend Mass, But Not Catholic

[Susan_Calvin]

CS Lewis said there are two mistakes we can make with the devil. The first is to believe he does not exist and the second is to pay too much attention to him.

Great quote! So I guess its a matter of striking a balance between the two… sounds a bit complicated.

grandfather:

Merton is a bit controversial. He surely has a lot of fans. He did get caught up in zen and some eastern philosophies. He was definitely not conventional. Decades later we see many Catholic orders and institutions that seem to have strayed away from the Catholicism of the saints to embrace new aginess and eastern religions that might be pantheist or atheist. Merton came along in the beginning of this trend and seemed to be going in that direction. His books were a big hit in secular circles among people who were looking for something spiritual, but not Christian or Catholic as well as with some Catholics.

Well, as I said I could just not get into him, I tried again to read the book I have and it is just not my forte. I much prefer the book I have on the Cure d’Ars… I simply love the stories about him! He’s quickly become one of my favourite saints.

grandfather:

I am not so sure. It is not a matter of having the best argument. It is a matter of having ears to hear. A prolonged debate will probably go nowhere. But, maybe a simple word from a friend not trying to threaten her might cause her to wake up.

“I am sorry to learn you have lost your faith”. Maybe that would be disrespectful and maybe not. How can being honest and charitable be disrespectful?

The problem is though, I really don’t know if she’s lost her faith… I mean, by all accounts it seems so, but… only God knows what is in her heart. Its really not for me to say or judge. I don’t know, I really struggle with it. I feel strongly that she doesn’t realize anything is wrong. In another thread someone was talking about Catholic dissidents and said something to the effect of, they are destroying the Church, but do not want to destroy the Church. Meaning I guess, they don’t realize what they’re doing. Reminds me of the crucifixion, where Jesus says, “Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do”. I place Sister in that category, I think she thinks she is doing right and working for the Church, how she perceives the Church should be. But on the other hand, I do agree she needs someone to set her straight. I’m just not sure I’m that person. I am praying for her though in any event.

 

[Susan_Calvin]

I do not want to alarm you at this point. But, the evil one does not sleep and is constantly attempting to lead us away from Christ. However, that same evil has many weaknesses, and his attacks can be defeated. This is a situation in which knowledge of the enemy is good.

Well, no worries about alarming me, I am glad you and others are talking about it. I’m having a bit of situation the past week which I think may be of this nature, though I started a new thread about it in the Spirituality forum so I won’t rehash it here.

po18guy:

Vigilance is the answer. The Eucharist is our best weapon against evil. The vigilance you exercise at Adoration is wonderfully effective.

I will keep that in mind and try to attend the perpetual adoration chapel a few more times this week if I can… its been a bit of a difficult week for me overall! It may very well help.

 

[Susan_Calvin]

The mental image of you “taking on a nun” made me laugh. I guess since they tend to be so peaceful it seems so out of character to imagine one in a fight.

Oh haha, not me… I was really scared of some of my teachers. There was one Sister, when I was about 12 years old, who was especially formidable. She was elderly and ornery and still wore a habit. I will never forget this one time, it was the end of class and we were just about to say our closing class prayer. One of the girls was upset with Sister over something, and when she said “In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit”, she said it in kind of a sing-songy disrespectful voice because she was upset. Well… OMG… Sister literally FLEW across the room and shrieked, YOU DO NOT MOCK A PRAYER!!! And dragged the poor girl out of the class. It was the most terrifying moment of my life, and I grew up in the South Bronx so that’s saying a lot!! To this day I would never, EVER mock a prayer. I always remember Sister’s wrath. And I certainly wouldn’t want to meet Sister in a dark alley somewhere, especially if I was mocking a prayer at the time!!

Liraco:

I think though, that you’ve been blessed with a gift of discernment because you rightly felt when someone was leading you to something untrue (you even could tell it from the Sister who others may have actually trusted but you clearly felt uneasy about). He’s not called the “father of lies” for nothing (making lies seem like truth, and truths to be false), so don’t stop praying to keep yourself strong.

Thanks, I hope you’re right about my discernment. I’ve had a bad week and prayer has been difficult but I am going to keep at it.

 

[po18guy]

Well, no worries about alarming me, I am glad you and others are talking about it. I’m having a bit of situation the past week which I think may be of this nature, though I started a new thread about it in the Spirituality forum so I won’t rehash it here.

I will check your other thread. Just be aware that the closer you come to the Lord, the stronger the evil one will try to disrupt your plans.

I will keep that in mind and try to attend the perpetual adoration chapel a few more times this week if I can… its been a bit of a difficult week for me overall! It may very well help.

An hour per week is the norm for those who regularly attend. If you find even more time than that, you are truly blessed - not to mention your desire to go! It is sad that adoration is not as full as mass is. It should be. In this life, we have precious little time to ourselves, and even less peace and quiet. Adoration of our Lord provides that peace and restores the soul.

 

[Susan_Calvin]

An hour per week is the norm for those who regularly attend. If you find even more time than that, you are truly blessed - not to mention your desire to go! It is sad that adoration is not as full as mass is.

Well I discovered a perpetual adoration chapel, open even in the middle of the night. Plus there is a church near me who has 5 hours adoration every Friday, and my own church has it once a week also. So between the 3 of them I usually am able to squeeze in about 2 hours. I certainly agree with you about attendance, other than being busy with work and so forth, if people have free time I don’t understand why they don’t attend.

 

[Liraco]

I think she thinks she is doing right and working for the Church, how she perceives the Church should be. But on the other hand, I do agree she needs someone to set her straight. I’m just not sure I’m that person. I am praying for her though in any event.

I don’t doubt this may be the case, but do agree she needs to be set straight. As I said before, if you see another opportunity then take it but proceed with love and don’t get baited by attempts to frustrate or make you mad. For the time being prayer is still best.

I’ve met a fellow on this forum who certainly seems to love God, but has been deceived. Also one who seems to “think” they’re doing right but are clearly wrong. He believes he knows the “truth” and yet his incoherencies and self-contradictions are so great that if only he could see what others see he just might realize his error. He’s unwilling to listen though (typical behavior of course) though if I may add this I’d ask for prayers for him (“Thorwald” seems to be his name).

---

On a more lighthearted note… I’d like to walk *along *with that sister if I were ever in some dark alley (so she’d protect me).

I’ll be checking out your other thread but be assured of my continued prayers for you.

Speaking of the “Curé d’Ars”, he was attacked at times and his be set on fire once by the devil. I think there’s another saint who was similarly “stalked” and it was a clear sign to the person that someone important was coming soon (perhaps to confession, it’s slipping my mind right now). I believe I either heard that on the Catholic Answers podcast or on one of the early shows of the saint cast (quite interesting in case you’re curious: saintcast.org/)

 

[grandfather]

]

Oh haha, not me… I was really scared of some of my teachers. There was one Sister, when I was about 12 years old, who was especially formidable. She was elderly and ornery and still wore a habit. I will never forget this one time, it was the end of class and we were just about to say our closing class prayer. One of the girls was upset with Sister over something, and when she said “In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit”, she said it in kind of a sing-songy disrespectful voice because she was upset. Well… OMG… Sister literally FLEW across the room and shrieked, YOU DO NOT MOCK A PRAYER!!! And dragged the poor girl out of the class. It was the most terrifying moment of my life, and I grew up in the South Bronx so that’s saying a lot!! To this day I would never, EVER mock a prayer. I always remember Sister’s wrath. And I certainly wouldn’t want to meet Sister in a dark alley somewhere, especially if I was mocking a prayer at the time!!

A lot of people tell stories about how strict nuns were. My sister works hard to support the Salesians. She was taught by nuns in high school, not Salesians. Her husband also went to Catholic school in a very bad neighborhood. His family was very poor and the parish priest paid his tuition. He graduated and went into business and became very wealthy. Now the two of them work hard to keep two schools open. The girls school has about 350 to 400 girls from a neighborhood Of those entering 9th grade there 90% end up with college degrees. These nuns are tough. They are strict with the girls and at the same time stick up for them. They are determined to not let them fail and end up on the streets. I was taught by nuns also and they were tough. We all joked about how tough they were and you did not dare cross them. At the same time we all knew they really loved us. That school is kept functioning today in a poor inner city neighborhood by the adults who suffered all of the abuse by those nuns, my peers. They cherish the place and are grateful for what it gave them. The parents of the students today also realize that if it were not for this school, Immaculate Conception, their kids would not have a chance.

Thanks, I hope you’re right about my discernment. I’ve had a bad week and prayer has been difficult but I am going to keep at it.

The saints tell us that we make spiritual progress in prayer when it is difficult. When we are experiencing consolations it is like a rest period, standing still. When we are experiencing dryness and do not see results, but persevere, is when we are receiving grace. We proceed in faith when things are difficult.

 

[grandfather]

I’ll be checking out your other thread but be assured of my continued prayers for you.

Speaking of the “Curé d’Ars”, he was attacked at times and his be set on fire once by the devil. I think there’s another saint who was similarly “stalked” and it was a clear sign to the person that someone important was coming soon (perhaps to confession, it’s slipping my mind right now). I believe I either heard that on the Catholic Answers podcast or on one of the early shows of the saint cast (quite interesting in case you’re curious: saintcast.org/)

Saint Padre Pio suffered terrible diabolical attacks as did Saint John Vianney. I personally know a priest who was attacked. It is very very rare.

 

[Liraco]

Saint Padre Pio suffered terrible diabolical attacks as did Saint John Vianney. I personally know a priest who was attacked. It is very very rare.

Ah, so my hunch wasn’t off (I didn’t want to mention him because I wasn’t sure). Funny because that podcast on saints has Padre Pio as the first (I tried looking for the mention of the attacks but couldn’t find it when skimming through it).

 

[Susan_Calvin]

]
The saints tell us that we make spiritual progress in prayer when it is difficult. When we are experiencing consolations it is like a rest period, standing still. When we are experiencing dryness and do not see results, but persevere, is when we are receiving grace. We proceed in faith when things are difficult.

Oh interesting, thanks! I haven’t had the dry period yet but I’ve had the other states. I of course prefer how it was when everything felt great (and it still feels really great, just very hard right now…), but its good to know that the trials help me. I am still quite amazed at how my prayers are answered. Not exactly or even close to how I suspect they will be answered, but answered nonetheless! Its very “uncanny”. Today was really a case in point of that.

 

[Susan_Calvin]

I’ve met a fellow on this forum who certainly seems to love God, but has been deceived. Also one who seems to “think” they’re doing right but are clearly wrong. He believes he knows the “truth” and yet his incoherencies and self-contradictions are so great that if only he could see what others see he just might realize his error. He’s unwilling to listen though (typical behavior of course) though if I may add this I’d ask for prayers for him (“Thorwald” seems to be his name).

I’ll be praying for him… I’ll add him to this list that I’ve started, that I now take to mass with me every day. I include on it people I’ve prayed for here from the Prayer Intentions section, and anyone else I think about praying for. I truly believe prayer helps. The more experience I have with prayer (which is still not much!!) the more I am realizing that. It still really amazes me and I honestly hope I never stop being amazed.

Liraco:

On a more lighthearted note… I’d like to walk *along *with that sister if I were ever in some dark alley (so she’d protect me).

YESSS she would make a great bodyguard! She was a wonderful Sister too. I used to eat lunch with her, when the other kids went home for lunch… she often brought me cookies or some other treat. She could be nice too.

Liraco:

Speaking of the “Curé d’Ars”, he was attacked at times and his be set on fire once by the devil. I think there’s another saint who was similarly “stalked” and it was a clear sign to the person that someone important was coming soon (perhaps to confession, it’s slipping my mind right now).

Wow. I really like this saint sooo much! If anyone has anymore stories, or good links about him, please share! I’m also thinking I should start reading this Padre Pio (St. Pio?) as he sounds very interesting too.

 

[chewchoo]

padrepio.com/
ewtn.com/padrepio/man/index.htm

padre pio is a contemporary saint. he died in 1968

 

[Susan_Calvin]

Oh that is very cool to know, how recent Padre Pio is, I had no idea. Thank you for the links.

 

[grandfather]

Oh that is very cool to know, how recent Padre Pio is, I had no idea. Thank you for the links.

Try to find some photos of him.

 

[grandfather]

Oh that is very cool to know, how recent Padre Pio is, I had no idea. Thank you for the links.

It also would not hurt to ask him for some help. He is a very powerful saint as you will find out. I am certain that he would be more than pleased to assist you.

 

[Liraco]

Oh that is very cool to know, how recent Padre Pio is, I had no idea. Thank you for the links.

I certainly recommend reading more of him. I’m sure you’d enjoy that podcast episode because it talks a lot about his gifts (among them, he could tell a person all of their sins since their last confession, he knew if a person was really repentant or not, he could bilocate, had the stigmata, and other things!)

I used to think that the saints that had all these great gifts were from older times but St. Padre (meaning father) Pio is a good example of a contemporary saint who still inspires many.

It’s good that your prayers continue to be answered and I’ll continue praying for you.

 

[MyCatholicHeart]

Judith-Wow, I just found this thread yeterday and stayed up WAY too late reading it and was finally able to finish it this morning! Your story is amazing!:yup: I agree with the others that you need to write a book someday-it would sell like crazy I’m sure. I know I’d buy it. It’s nice to read about someone else that hasn’t had any big objections to the faith as they learn about it. I thought I was the only one. Everyone I’ve talked to about converting have had issues with one doctrine or another but I feel like I was born Catholic and someone forgot to tell me for 30 years! I find myself able to agree whole-heartedly with everything I’m learning…at least I am once I understand it!
I wish you all the best as you continue your journey. prayers for you
MyCatholicHeart:heart:

 

[po18guy]

Originally Posted by Susan_Calvin
Oh that is very cool to know, how recent Padre Pio is, I had no idea. Thank you for the links.

Try to find some photos of him.

Just go to Google Images and type in “Padre Pio”. There, you will find pages and pages of pictures of him. There were quite a few that I had not seen before.

Christ’s peace be with you.

 

[qui_est_ce]

{snip}
Since I moved to this neighbourhood a couple of months back, I’ve frequented a nearby coffee shop and take walks in a nearby park. In both the park and the coffee shop, I often see the same older man, also walking or having a coffee. After a few times of seeing each other he started saying hello to me, and we’ve had some brief general conversations, such as discussing the weather. This morning I saw him in his car, and he waved to me and smiled so I waved back. He seems like a very nice man, and the only “stranger” I’ve had any contact with in this neighbourhood thus far…

This morning I was thinking about mass again so I went online and found the church’s website. I thought I would read a bit about the parish itself in an attempt to feel more comfortable to attend. Well, when I clicked on the priest’s page, guess whose picture was staring back at me!! I almost passed out. Its still jacket weather here, so I guess I never really noticed a collar… though in retrospect he does always wear black… just never thought anything of it… but wow!! Seriously, what are the odds that the one and only person in this neighbourhood who has befriended me is the priest of the parish I’ve been thinking about attending?? I am floored…

Hi Susan,
I only just tripped on this thread, and intend on reading through. Before I do that, though, I wanted to tell you that the above happens to me a lot. It’s because you have the eyes of your soul open to the Lord. Once your eyes are opened, you will realize these aren’t coincidences, but rather you are recognizing God all around you. It’s a wonderful, wonderful awareness that God LOVES and WANTS YOU SUSAN CALVIN. God is searching YOU out, just as he searched me out. :extrahappy:

I pray always that the eyes of my soul be open to the many blessing and graces God sends my way daily.:bowdown:

You are in my prayers, and the prayers of many here at CAF and the saints in Heaven!

 

[qui_est_ce]

Change to Judith, sorry. Stll reading, three hours later!