Greenfield, aka Hog Calin’ Sally, has come up with a bold and innovative suggestion in her home diocese, which has reduced the harmful societal effects of mortal sin. Murders are down 29%, robbery is down 45%, crimes against women and children are down over 60%. And other societal menaces are down ever greater. Her suggestion to the Bishop. At confession, instead of giving penances of saying certain prayers, sinners as a condition of reconciliation are to watch 8 straight hours of commercials for Progressive Insurance featuring that albino chick, Flo. The thought of such a horrible penance has not only chilled Catholics and set them on the right path, but the idea is spreading to other denominations and results according to officials of those churches are reported to be consistent with the Catholic statistics.
As a commendation for her brilliance, the Bishop has awarded Hog Callin Sally, the Ad Altare Dei award. Sally humbly accepted.