When did you have your first child?

  • Thread starter Thread starter MooCowSteph
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MooCowSteph:
I’m wondering, how old were you when you had your fist child? Do you wish you’d waited longer or tried earlier? I am 24, married 3 years, and am starting to feel the baby-bug coming on! Many people (mostly people who do not know me very well) keep saying, “you’re too young” or “you’re just a baby!”. The thing is, my husband is quite a bit older than me, and that’s just one reason I don’t want to wait too long. We’re thinking I’ll try to get pregnant is about a year. I am excited, as is my mom!
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I have the baby bug too, but my husband is more reluctant. He is 28 and I’m 23. He states all kind of “logical” reasons why we shouldn’t (I’m finishing school, and he is trying to get a career started). But that does little to calm my desire. We’ve been married just over a year, and I hope to get pregnant within the year…but it is up to God 🙂
 
We are hoping to be 23 or so when our first comes along. I may get lucky enough to be 22 as I might be now.:gopray2:

We are both 21 and very happy to be in a wonderful relationship that will allow us to do this early no matter what our family says about waiting until we are atleast 25. Any way if I had to give up my baby bug for 5 or ten years I would be locked up in the nut house or constantly volunteering with all the childrens groups I could find.

Kat
 
To the Original poster: You need to not focus so much on age but on whether you have a serious reason for postponing pregnancy. If so, you need to use NFP and not artifical contraception (contact CCL at ccli.org).

Also, infertility is greater for couples when the husband is older than the wife (5 yrs+).

My husband and I had our first child at age 30. Wish we had started earlier. We also wish that we had selected better majors in college so that we could have afforded to start having kids sooner and have more children all while having a stay at home Mom.

You will never regret having a child. The fact that you are married and you care about the manner in which you raise your children puts you miles ahead of most people.
 
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MooCowSteph:
I’m wondering, how old were you when you had your fist child? Do you wish you’d waited longer or tried earlier? I am 24, married 3 years, and am starting to feel the baby-bug coming on! Many people (mostly people who do not know me very well) keep saying, “you’re too young” or “you’re just a baby!”. The thing is, my husband is quite a bit older than me, and that’s just one reason I don’t want to wait too long. We’re thinking I’ll try to get pregnant is about a year. I am excited, as is my mom!
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I don’t think you are too young at all. Listen to your instincts, not everyone elses advice. I got married at 18 and EVERYONE told us we were too young, but now that they’ve seen how commited we are they realize how wrong they were. I’m expecting my first in Feb. and I’ll have just turned 22, my husband 24. We’re so excited and ready. Good luck!
 
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StephiePea:
Were you open to children right away?
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the twins were born 13 months after we were married… open to children… guess so… if we could have figured out what did it, we probably wouldn’t have done it… 😃

 
Hello,

I said yesterday that I might be 22, and it looks like I will be. I got my positive a little bit ago. So as long as nothing changes it will be 8 months.

Kat
 
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KittyKat:
Hello,

I said yesterday that I might be 22, and it looks like I will be. I got my positive a little bit ago. So as long as nothing changes it will be 8 months.

Kat
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the best news i have seen on these forums in a long long time…
congratulations… 👍

(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)
 
I was 23, it has benefits and downsides, my youngest is 17 on January.
I get to do things with my children as I’m still relatively young at 46.
Some of my friends have 2 year olds, and some with 7 and 8 year olds, so they might not be as agile when their children get into their 20’s, and I’m thinking I’m glad to have that all-over me.
Then again I have 3 grandchildren, but I can always hand them back.😉
 
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KittyKat:
Hello,

I said yesterday that I might be 22, and it looks like I will be. I got my positive a little bit ago. So as long as nothing changes it will be 8 months.

Kat
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Congratulations!

DH and I have been actively trying (rather than “whatever happens, happens”) for 6 months now. I’ll be 27 in May (DH will be 30 in March) and I’m hoping that we’ll have our first before I’m 28.
 
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KittyKat:
Hello,

I said yesterday that I might be 22, and it looks like I will be. I got my positive a little bit ago. So as long as nothing changes it will be 8 months.

Kat
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Congratulations!! I’m so happy for you! 🙂
 
Thanks,

now I don’t have to feel so guilty about not feeling good last night at Mass. I am not contagious. Or I hope not.😉

I hope the OP figures this all out, it all depends on life. If we were not where we are I would be going nuts right now. Okay I would still be nuts, but I don’t think I will ever be normal.

I wouldn’t let other people decide it all for you.

Kat
 
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your first child. Our first baby caught a staff infection in the hospital after he was born and died two days later.
My Father in law remarried and had a second family the same time his son (my husband) and I did. His little girls would get so angry when they would hear my sons call him grandpa. They’d say, he’s not your grandpa, he’s My daddy.
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Lance:
I was 30 when we got married, my wife was 22. We had our first child when I was 32, she lived only a day, we had our next child when I was 34, another at 37 and the last at 42. I wish I had been younger so that I would have more time to spend with my grandchildren but I would not have married my wonderful wife if I had married at 23 or 24. So I guess things are working out just as God planned. 🙂
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We had our first when I was 20 and our sixth when I was 32. I had 4 children by the age of 25 so was a young, energetic and enthusiastic mother and I believe they benefitted, but I also believe my younger two benefitted from me being older and more secure in who I was and what I believed in (and although we were marginally more secure financially, I don’t think this is necessarily always a positive for the child - having parents who were relatively resources rich and time poor, they missed out on egg carton houses, gumnut christmas decorations and the like). There are positives and negatives to both younger and older parenting. I don’t think there is any one correct answer.
 
We had our first when my wife was 18 & I was 19 That was 26 years ago. We were high school kids, there wasn’t time for college or seeing the world or building a career, instead it was minimum wage jobs and no insurance. By all standards we were destined to fail, in fact my parents encouraged an abortion! We married instead, that unfortunate “mistake” is now a wonderfully devout young woman with advanced degrees teaching in a Catholic school. We have 11 kids now ages 26 , 25, 23, 19 ,17, 11, 9, 8,6,4 and 2 each and every one is a blessing from God. I even got “Fixed” for 10 years after the first three, adopted two foster children (out of 21 foster children over the years), converted to the faith got “Un-Fixed” in '91 and had 6 more kids! we live modestly, there’s nothing fancy in this old house but our oldest three are out of college now and doing wonderful. God blesses us with each child and we are always open to life even now in middle age! we’re shooting for #12. Our marriage couldn’t be better, being open to life and to God’s blessings is what brings true happiness to our marriage, not careers, big houses, cars or worldy plans. Just my .02 but trust God and accept all he gives you with a gratfeul heart.
 
I wouldn’t marry just anyone and it took me a while to find the right man. I got married when I was 31 and had my one and only child when I was 33. And it’s been happily ever after, ever since.

And that’s not a joke; it’s true. I’ve never been so happy and fulfilled since I got married and became a mother. I’m so glad I took the time for find just the right husband for me. Our son is in his 20’s now and he’s our pride and joy.
 
My husband and I married when I was 23 and he was 25 fresh out of Law School. I found out that I was expecting while I was in Chicago at a Conference when I was 25 and still in College. We had no insurance and even though my husband was an attorney we had absolutely no money. But the Lord introduced us to a Birthing Center just outside of Wash. D.C. where we only had to pay $4,000. My husband took a second job at a resturant to pay for the birth of our little one. A financial struggle yes but what a wonderful gift. Everyone thought we were crazy and should have been more “responsible”. But what was done was done and we were really excited. I finished college and graduated on Mothers Day 1997. Were there is a will there is a way.

We had insurance for the next three and all four of our babies were born in the same bed at the same Maternity Center. Every time we announced we were pregnant our family cringed. But we felt so blessed. I was just shy of 26 with Will in 1996, 28 with Caleb in 1998, 29 with Abigail in 1999 (an unexpected angel), and our fourth little one, Elinore, was born Christmas Eve 2001. We were unfortunate and lost a baby girl inbetween the girls, but now my babies have an angel in Heaven watching out for them.

If we had waited for the “right” time to start a family we would probably still just be two. Don’t let anyone outside of your Holy Union influence your decisions. At 34 and 36 we are now thinking of babies 5 & 6 and let me tell you, people think we are full of the crazies. But that is ok, we aren’t asking them to raise our little brood.

Good luck and may God Bless you.
 
22 with my first child. We’d been married just under 2 years when she was born. My next child was born when I was 24 years old.
 
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