Everything that
@AdamP88 said was good.
The problem is that the word submission has now become associated in our brains with subordination but it shouldn’t mean this!
On the one one, you have a lot of the western world pushing that men and women are fundamentally the same and trying to reduce notions of femininity and masculinity and trying to make everyone same same.
On the other hand, discussions around “submission” are often US centric, often from an evangelical point of view, and can be twisted and more about ego stroking, sometimes sadly even married dysfunction and abuse etc…
Realistically, there are many Catholics these days, even in traditional countries where gender roles are most pronounced, where the notion of submission doesn’t even come into the marriage, and for those couples who it does, it is very rarely.
To make it bother you less, think of the old saying:
The man is the head
but the woman is the neck
and the neck can turn the head anyway she wants