Potential atheist boyfriend

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Sorry, meant to address the OP, to reread your post, which was spot on. Yikes, haste, haste.

You gave the best advice.
 
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I don’t think you’re the strong Catholic you think you are if you believe you could allow yourself to become serious with an atheist. Not a good idea and you should break things off immediately. Have seen this far too many times and it rarely turns out well.
 
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Making out on the second date? BIG red flag.

Will marriage to an atheist help you and your children get to heaven?
 
“I am calling to cancel our date. I wish you the best. Good bye.”
 
Dacinom said:
“I want you to know early, before we are dating too long, I plan on waiting until marriage to have sex.”
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Clearer than that. “I will not be engaging in any form of intimacy, no making out, no fooling around. Nothing will happen between us that could not happen in front of our parents and grandparents. Period. Nothing.”

I’d also advise our OP that missionary dating is a bad idea, but, if she is going to insist on it, listen to every podcast at Red Pill Religion.
 
To add to this, one of my friend’s father dated a woman who was a non-Catholic with the idea he would convert her, and a holy priest he knew dispelled him of that notion. He would not have married the devout woman his wife is and had their pious children had he remained and tried to covert her.
 
Well, it kind of seems to me that Emily has gotten her answer in no uncertain terms. 🙂
 
Agreed. She’ll probably need a few moments to read and digest all this. We don’t want nor need to dog pile on her.
 
What I would say is if he is using you for his own personal pleasure, then he doesn’t love you are respect you. A respectable guy would not use you or have sex with you till you are both married. If you hope to see God in heaven don’t give this guy a chance. I know I’m being rather harsh but nothing good could come out of this relationship. Think about it… If you go on and get married you may fall away from the faith, and if you dumb him after you’ve gone to far, it’ll be too late…
 
At least Justified is more entertaining than two lovebirds with different worldviews.
 
You should be very cautious. Not only does it seem you have opposing moral values, he is older and brought up sex on the second date. These are huge red flags. You mention becoming “monogamous.” I suppose you meant while having a physical relationship outside of marriage. You would be quite unwise to expect any commitment from him under such a circumstance.
 
As others have said, roving hands on only the 2nd date is a red flag. Of course I’m much older and old-fashioned but 2nd date to me should be maybe holding hands and no more. You should get to know each other before engaging in passionate kissing.
 
Loud-living-dogma said:
He’s a 21-year-old atheist. I doubt very much he has marriage on his mind. Sorry to be crass, but I think most guys his age are looking to “get laid”, not get married! Look at his family. What is his upbringing and home life like?
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This really isn’t fair. Plenty of atheists are good, upstanding people. Just as there are good Catholics and bad Catholics, the same goes for atheists
 
yes, but he is making out and getting ‘handsy’ on the second date… that’s… pretty pushy
 
Eh. No harm, no foul. She just needs to set her boundaries and have an honest conversation with him. In today’s world, this should be advised for any couple starting a dating relationship. The good news is that no guy is going to try to string her along after having a conversation like that. She should not be afraid to be honest. Then he can be honest. If it is a deal-breaker for him he can move on and not waste her time. If he’s really interested in her as a person, then the boundaries may not be a problem for him. I don’t understand why everybody on this thread is assuming he’s a terrible person just because he is an atheist. Most people believe that a sexual relationship is a healthy part of a dating relationship, given certain parameters. I realize Catholics don’t believe this, and that is fine. However just know that because somebody doesn’t believe the same as you does not make them a terrible person.
 
yes, but to build a stable relationship on that would be very difficult… I think that’s why most advice in this thread is on the negative.
 
I went on a date awhile back. She seemed nice… Then I noticed she talked about all her friends in the past tense and then she started complaining about her family. So I started maneuvering the conversation. Turned out she had a lot of issues and had pushed everyone away 😬 Worse yet, she didn’t think she needed help! One cup of coffee :coffee: was all it took for me to move on quickly.

I’m cautious. As a rule, I don’t hand hold or kiss until many dates have passed. I analyze their relationships with friends and family. I’m not afraid to mention God or politics; however, this must be done tactfully.
 
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