Tell an Outrageous Lie About the Previous Poster

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mVitus has a new Star Trek Transporter. He also as an assault rifle to guard it against @boldlygo, who wants to add it to his Enterprise collection.
 
Bartholo invented a compact time machine that fast-forwards time exactly ten minutes. He used it at Mass during an especially long-winded homily. His outraged pastor notified the bishop, who alerted the Vatican, who dispatched an elite team of the Swiss Guard to confiscate the time machine, which is now gathering dust in a giant warehouse on a shelf next to the carburetor that gets 200 MPG.
 
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christofirst has under gone bankruptcy, he went broke after sinking his life savings into his electric powered generator.
 
TheLegend is the one who initiated the chain of sequences by suing after the electric-powered generator didn’t work when TheLegend experienced a hurricane in Kansas. The most significant damage was that he lost his My Little Pony online collection as his device lost memory when it lost power.
 
Speaking of ‘lost memory’…mVitus hasn’t had a good night’s sleep in weeks…he’s a coffee lover, and he especially enjoys the Keurig single-serve varieties…except he can’t remember whether or not he had a cup recently…so he brews another…and another…and another…and he wonders why he can’t sleep…
 
Driver or passenger…what’s the difference? 'TheLegend is capable of throwing that 1966 Cadillac hearse over the top of any retirement home you’ll ever see…trust me…‘TheLegend’ is!!
 
Speaking of bankruptcies, boldlygo recently filed a Chapter 13 bankruptcy. He lost everything when he invested his and the family fortune in the timber rights to Death Valley.
 
Joeybaggz makes his living as a stand up comedian in retail stores. Some of his most frequent jokes are to tell people using a chip card to have salsa, saying he’s gotten turned on when flipping a register light on, and telling people they get thrown in the dungeon when they try to be clever and ask what happens if they don’t press the yes button. Unfortunately his managers just pay him for his normal work without any bonuses for the comedy.
 
For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that “mVitus” died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that He was buried, that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, and that He appeared to Cephas and then to the Twelve.…
 
IWantGod never liked school…he graduated first in his high school class, but was miserable achieving that goal. As a consequence of all his effort, he missed out on most of the socialization that most teenagers get. His angst driven motivation started in kindergarten when, despite tutoring from his peers and teachers, he could not master the game of “telephone”. He couldn’t correctly repeat anything he heard verbally, as is evident in his post above. So he concentrated on test taking, and so passed pre-school by showing the teachers he could color within the lines most of the time.
 
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QLord1Faith was once asked about his views on Pastafarianism. He replied that bagel hair in marinara was his favorite. He still hasn’t figured out why the questioner looked confused.
 
mVitus is currently held hostage by a team of three highly trained assassins in their plot to take out Ronald McDonald.
 
Bartholo (who really prefers the name Barty) was caught trying to sell bottled water gathered from the fountain in the town square.
 
SuperLuigi has a secret vendetta against anyone who sells or makes bottled water, and especially against fountain water, as he believes that drinking it will grant superpowers and he wants to keep it all for himself.
 
SuperLuigi!! Good to see you again, my friend!!

SuperLuigi was forced to lock the doors at his Maine bait shop when he was caught selling al dente linguini as imported flatworms.
 
AmericanRose is so sure that ‘a rose by any other name would smell as sweet’ that deodorant is now a thing of the past…so are close friends…
 
Determined to be listed in the Guinness Book of World Records, mountaineer and hip hop enthusiast boldlygo became the first non-Tibetan to breakdance atop Mount Everest.
 
Christofirst almost fell of the mountain while he was breakdancing- but shhhh, it’d ruin his reputation
 
Whoops I can’t read. I meant: christofirst is insanely jealous of boldlygo and is planning to copy him
 
AmericanRose, going off his lack of deodorant, has gained a fierce reputation for sending skunks in a 5 mile radius from him running for the hills.
 
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