Using most of the MGTOW Philosophy in choosing the right women?

[TheLittleLady]

r all their false accusations against me that I cry every nightime

I am sorry that you have this sort of emotional pain. Please, seek a good counselor to help you get past this. It is not normal to cry every night. Seek therapy and healing.

I have been through with 20 women with this kind of experience.

As I would tell my own brother or son, this sort of number says your “picker” needs to be recalibrated. If you had 3 bad relationships, that can be marked up to chance. A person does not randomly date 20 abusive people, there is something inside that is causing them to be attracted to these abusers.

Again, counseling and growing in Christ can help you become the sort of man who attracts women of virtue. Men and women of virtue are drawn to each other.

Make friends with Catholics.

This website will help you find your Diocese website. Search for young adult groups, I have heard that Theology on Tap is in your country, that is just one example of young adult fellowship opportunities.

http://www.catholic-hierarchy.org/country/dph.html

Events like this one will allow you to meet other on-fire Catholics:

Log into Facebook

Log into Facebook to start sharing and connecting with your friends, family, and people you know.

www.facebook.com

 

[TheLittleLady]

I guess I did dating all wrong. Aside from a dinner or a movie ticket, and holidays/birthdays, I never asked for/expected/received gifts or money from men I dated. I would have fund that kinda creepy. I’ve always had a job.

Even after marriage, sure there are little things like a candy bar or a box of colored ink pens (I am a pen freak) just because, but, I don’t expect to be showered with gifts and money.

Thinking about it, I do not know any women who do expect money and extravagant gifts from dates.

 

[redbetta]

Yet despite all that negativity, I still date. But not online, I’m not tall enough or good looking enough for that ride. Not to mention I’m a blue collar tradesman though I have a college degree. So Catholic Match did not work for me as it is just as visually oriented as the secular dating sites.

As a woman, I don’t get it. What’s so bad about being blue-collar? They make better cash than a lot of degree-holding desk jockeys. Also, I find it hard to believe so many women would reject someone just for looks. Often, a woman would start finding the rest of the guy beautiful if they fall in love with him as a person. I initially thought that my old boyfriend looked like a dork. But, I came to Love it.

 

[Lea101]

As a woman, I don’t get it. What’s so bad about being blue-collar?

I don’t get it either. It has got to do with all those rom coms most of us grew up watching. Some rich and sexy man falling in love with the blandest girl ever.

Also, I find it hard to believe so many women would reject someone just for looks. Often, a woman would start finding the rest of the guy beautiful if they fall in love with him as a person.

That’s life. Men reject ugly women too.
Whatever I guess, physical/sexual attraction is important. I’ve had crushes on average looking men after knowing about their personalities, for sure. And then lost them when I find a big flaw. But to be honest, it’s not like I found them physically attractive. But rather it’s almost like ‘oh he’s average but he’s really funny, smart, kind etc’.

TBH, stuff like this only applies to average guys and gals. Ugly people usually don’t get the chance to show off how nice they are, and they are simply not considered. I don’t blame people for becoming cynical about this/opting for surgery etc.

 

[redbetta]

I don’t get it either. It has got to do with all those rom coms most of us grew up watching. Some rich and sexy man falling in love with the blandest girl ever.

I never watched romantic comedies. I maybe have seen three in my life. I remain uncorrupted.

 

[Lea101]

Right before my mom passed, we would buy chips and chocolate and binge on them. And then listen to her lament about my dad. I blame her for both my expectations and health, lol

 

[redbetta]

I find it weird that, despite how much women care and are expected to care about our appearances, female culture condones overeating in response to breakups, extreme emotions, periods, etc. My mom is the reason why my relationship to food is so terrible in a way my male friends don’t struggle with.

 

[edwest211]

On a forum where people are encouraged to think things through, where is this “female culture”? It appears to be a mindset and not reality. Of the women I dated, each one was an individual. Each one had their own unique background.

 

[Lea101]

female culture condones overeating in response to breakups, extreme emotions, periods, etc

It was just a joke, lol.

Probably because dieting can be a prominent part of a woman’s life. Extreme emotions come=diet backfires. On film, it can be used as a tool to highlight the character’s breakdown and maybe girls imitate it. That, and them changing their hairstyles. People who are obsessed with diets are actually more obsessed with good than the actual person.

To be honest with you, I don’t really binge over sad moments. I resorted to starving, which isn’t healthy either lol. I do snack a lot when watching stuff though. That’s more of a ‘me’ problem.

 

[redbetta]

If there was no such thing as female or male culture, there would not be media, magazines, and other such stuff catering to those demographics.

 

[edwest211]

Media created cultural prompts are not the issue. The issue is finding women where you and her are agreeable.

 

[redbetta]

It’s a chicken and egg problem. In some ways, media influences what people want and, in other ways, it takes the pulse of the culture and gives the audience what it thinks they want.

Also, you do realize that I’m a woman, right?

 

[edwest211]

No, I didn’t realize you are a woman. Anonymity does not allow for good assumptions.

The media does influence people but only up to a point. I know women who accepted a working-class marriage and others who wanted nothing but an upper-class marriage. It was very clear what they wanted so the choice was clear. Not a chicken or egg scenario.

 

[redbetta]

Sir, I think we are talking past each other. I’m discussing generalizations and you brought up an individual case.

Also, it says I’m a lady on my profile.

 

[MagdalenaRita]

Find an orthodox Catholic woman. Trust me, we are out there and we do value men as more than mere paychecks.

TheLowestHumanBeing:

That is exactly what I am looking for … redbetta. They are rare and hard to come by. Question is how to find them?

They are hard to come by if you are searching on your own. May I suggest a very good prayer partner. Saint Raphael. The patron saint of happy meetings.

https://chastecourtship.com/category/prayers/prayers-for-your-future-spouse/?print=pdf-search

Also, check out the story of Tobit in the Old Testament. This is where we hear of St. Raphael leading a young man to the young woman he is to marry.

I, also would suggest changing your image of yourself. I am saying that because I noticed the name you are using here at CAF.

I realize, sadly, that feminist attitudes have caused many men to think pretty low of themselves but remember Christ died for you, He loves you and wants good for you and when He created you, He said, that is good.

Not all women are feminists and not all feminists are women. As redbetta said above, there are good women out there and they are looking for someone to love also.

God bless.

 

[Zzyzx_Road]

That’s life. Men reject ugly women too.

Short men and ugly women have one thing in common: online dating doesn’t work very well for either party. Ugly women at least have the possibility of working on their presentation if they start on it young enough while short men will always be short men.

Most short men I’ve seen succeed are extroverted. I’m very introverted. At least I can dance and I can carry a conversation. Most ugly women I’ve seen succeed really put in the work on their presentation in addition to developing a nice pleasant personality. Either way, both did their best work in real life, not online.

 

[redbetta]

I like short men. They are less intimidating and easy to warm up to. My ex was three inches shorter than me.

 

[Lea101]

Ugly women at least have the possibility of working on their presentation if they start in it young enough

I promise you, I tried really really hard

short men will always be short men.

I’m extremely short (5"0) so I’m not picky when it comes to height. I think 6" guys would hurt their backs if they have to constantly bend down, lol

I live in South East Asia though, average height for men is lower. unfortunately I see many of them feel insecure because the whole 6" craze caught on here.

 

[Xantippe]

That is truly the worst effect of feminism on ordinary men like me, that it enables and celebrates women who blow up marriages for no other reason than they fell out of love.

Meanwhile, our president is on wife #3 and has cheated on every single one…

I suppose he fell out of love, too?

 

[Xantippe]

I guess I did dating all wrong. Aside from a dinner or a movie ticket, and holidays/birthdays, I never asked for/expected/received gifts or money from men I dated. I would have fund that kinda creepy. I’ve always had a job.

Even after marriage, sure there are little things like a candy bar or a box of colored ink pens (I am a pen freak) just because, but, I don’t expect to be showered with gifts and money.

Thinking about it, I do not know any women who do expect money and extravagant gifts from dates.

I’ve mentioned this before in other threads, but I’ll do it again:

I don’t know about the Philippines, but in traditional Anglo-American culture, nice women do not accept large gifts from men who are not close relatives or their husband or fiancee. Traditionally, the first large gift a woman is supposed to accept from a man she is dating is an engagement ring. Otherwise, gifts should be small (in the neighborhood of a book) and a woman should never accept a gift from a man she is dating that she could not afford to buy herself…except that engagement ring.

As The Little Lady mentioned, it’s not a good idea to shower somebody even with small gifts, because you may make them feel uncomfortable and beholden to you. It could feel like you are trying to buy their affection. As other people have mentioned, normal women will run away from that, while users will stick around and enjoy the party. Excessive generosity attracts bad people.