This is why I know it’s alright for me to question and step away from catholicism and say “this is NOT right”. God gave me a mind to think and reason with and hands to help myself with … he couldn’t possibly want me to forfeit their use. …You are right God is not a hypocrit. We live ibn a human environment so it is in that where we use our sences. But in living her we are as youknow not OF the world only for a short time IN it. He doesn’t say or do something then say I don’t want you to use it. As you know ALL we are given are as gifts from God , but it is what we do with them and the final outcome that counts. If the glory is self induction, or, given to God.
If God wanted to, he could destroy me right now or eradicate me from existence, but he doesn’t and I think that’s because;
(a) he WANTS me to search and seek and not just blindly accept “truth” because saint so and so and Pope so and so said so …
You are right and no one knows as much as St Paul or even me. I was told to go and get some milk one winter night and I was doing nothing but then I remembered dad would be home soon so I better get on my bike and get it before dad got home.
I left and it was getting late in those winter days we didn’t have head gear and as I was going down town a drunk hit me (I was 11yrs) I was flung off the bike over the three lane road and hit the concrete head first. You know where it happened? right outside the Catholic church, you know when? at the Concecration of the Host.
I lay there blood gushing from my head, someone came in asked for a Doctor, the Priest and then my father was called to see his son laying there. You know all because I was disobedient to mum.
You know what, God could have taken me in my disobedient state, right then as you have mentioned, but He decided in His wisdome that He could use this person and 48 years latter He has put mje through hell time and again to change me. But girl I did the same as you I questioned "God I know You are love, I don’t see it in the church (people) the way Jesus tells me about it, I want it where is it? I questioned it for some 14 years until God showed me and on my knees in front of others, I wept when I took Jesus as my only reason to live He alone had given His whole life for a sinful disobedient person as me. And then the heavens opened and I saw that I had been disobedient to God the Father and He inturn forgave me by sending His son to redeam my sinfulness and on that concrete the Father gave my life back to me, redeamed through Jesus dieing for my sins, opening the doors for a sinner like me.
(b) He is not threatened by my seeking
No I seeked, as God wishes us to, give our thoughts away and seek the wholeness of God as LOVE unsermounted.
(c) perhaps it was His very will that I step back and re-examine things